Anonymous
Post 04/09/2015 07:39     Subject: I declined these invites -- What would you do?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It not just falling on the ice though, is it? Its falling on the ice amongst people wearing blades on the bottom of their skates.

Face + skate = mess


I am at an ice rink twice a week with my daughter, for a minimum of two hours each time if not longer. We've been going for eight years. In all that time I've seen a couple of injuries to fingers, but nobody has ever gotten a blade to the face. My own child basically tripped forward throwing a trick and belly flopped onto the ice, and although she scared me by staying down for more seconds I thought was reasonable, her face was totally fine and she only got bruises on her hips and ribs, and nobody ran over her.

Generally when little kids who are non-skaters fall, they fall onto their knees or onto their butts.


We've been to the ice rink more than a few times ourselves and generally the less experienced people skate to the outside of the rink while the more experienced people skate to the inside. Some of the folks are skating around the rink pretty fast and not all of them have excellent control. If one of them bumped a kinder that child would go flying. And that is why you rarely see a young, inexperienced child out on the ice trying to navigate a busy rink alone.

Often for bday parties at the rink the party package will include a group lesson for the party goers - an employee actually gets out on the ice with them and teaches them to skate as a group. You have to pay extra for that. Otherwise, parents stay with their child and skate with their child - usually.
Anonymous
Post 04/09/2015 07:31     Subject: Re:I declined these invites -- What would you do?
The cash thing would have completely turned me off. We've given cash as Birthday gifts to older kids and teens because honestly, that's what they want. I would never give cash as a gift to a kindergartner.

Any mention of a gift on an invitation is just tacky beyond words. It wouldn't prevent me from sending my child to the party. I wouldn't want to punish a five year old for having clueless parents. But I wouldn't send cash.
Anonymous
Post 04/09/2015 07:27     Subject: Re:I declined these invites -- What would you do?
Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks for the responses so far. Although there are varying opinions, I feel that most would not attend the party on the basis of the required cash gift.

Someone asked if family was American -- which they are.

To be honest, the cash gift is really what turned me off, and all the other dumb decisions on their part were just ancillary. Had the gift not been an issue, we might have gone to the skating party. But DC had never been on skates, so I brought her for lessons for a few weeks before the party (not yet deciding whether to go). She was doing ok after a few weeks (not falling every time she got up). But If I had sent her totally green, she would not have had a good time. One of the moms said the family was having this party to show off their daughter's skating abilities. I don't necessarily agree with that because I am sure this is what the daughter wanted, right? Who knows.

I also want to point out that we were invited to another skating that year, but this one rented a small private rink and had a teacher there to help new skaters. That is really the way to throw a party for such young skaters imo.

As for the Valentine Day party, it was mostly the fact that the party was on a Saturday night in a part of town that does not have any decent restaurant choices. DH and I always try to go out mostly every Saturday, especially if he has been traveling a lot. So the idea of dropping off and going on a date was not working for us. But I could not believe the same cash request was made for the presents AGAIN.

At other parties, I have seen requests for donations for certain charities (like animal rescues or food banks), but the entire donation would go to the charity. Many still brought presents for the child, but there was no request for that. Not THAT is classy.




I'm with you on the cash but disagree abojt the skating. Every skate rink has walkers your child can use if they are new. Besides that they also have staff. I've never heard of a party where the parent is expected to provide your child with assistant. Idk just seems odd that you were so worried about the skating aspect.
Anonymous
Post 04/09/2015 07:13     Subject: Re:I declined these invites -- What would you do?
OP here. Thanks for the responses so far. Although there are varying opinions, I feel that most would not attend the party on the basis of the required cash gift.

Someone asked if family was American -- which they are.

To be honest, the cash gift is really what turned me off, and all the other dumb decisions on their part were just ancillary. Had the gift not been an issue, we might have gone to the skating party. But DC had never been on skates, so I brought her for lessons for a few weeks before the party (not yet deciding whether to go). She was doing ok after a few weeks (not falling every time she got up). But If I had sent her totally green, she would not have had a good time. One of the moms said the family was having this party to show off their daughter's skating abilities. I don't necessarily agree with that because I am sure this is what the daughter wanted, right? Who knows.

I also want to point out that we were invited to another skating that year, but this one rented a small private rink and had a teacher there to help new skaters. That is really the way to throw a party for such young skaters imo.

As for the Valentine Day party, it was mostly the fact that the party was on a Saturday night in a part of town that does not have any decent restaurant choices. DH and I always try to go out mostly every Saturday, especially if he has been traveling a lot. So the idea of dropping off and going on a date was not working for us. But I could not believe the same cash request was made for the presents AGAIN.

At other parties, I have seen requests for donations for certain charities (like animal rescues or food banks), but the entire donation would go to the charity. Many still brought presents for the child, but there was no request for that. Not THAT is classy.
Anonymous
Post 04/09/2015 05:07     Subject: I declined these invites -- What would you do?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It not just falling on the ice though, is it? Its falling on the ice amongst people wearing blades on the bottom of their skates.

Face + skate = mess


I grew up skating in Canada. I've probably spent thousands of hours on the ice, and I've never seen someone injured in that manner by another skater.


A party of 20 x 5 year olds, none of whom have skated before = higher chance of this happening than in Canada where you're born with skates on your toes.


We had an ice skating party in February for my special needs child. About half the kids had motor challenges of some kind. None suffered facial injuries or bodily contact with ice blades despite many falls. You really have a kind of bizarre mindset about safety. Perhaps you have anxiety in general?
Anonymous
Post 04/09/2015 02:40     Subject: I declined these invites -- What would you do?
Anonymous wrote:It not just falling on the ice though, is it? Its falling on the ice amongst people wearing blades on the bottom of their skates.

Face + skate = mess


Have you ever skated?

Anonymous
Post 04/09/2015 02:22     Subject: I declined these invites -- What would you do?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It not just falling on the ice though, is it? Its falling on the ice amongst people wearing blades on the bottom of their skates.

Face + skate = mess


I grew up skating in Canada. I've probably spent thousands of hours on the ice, and I've never seen someone injured in that manner by another skater.


Yeah but five year olds in Canada know how to ice skate!
Anonymous
Post 04/09/2015 02:20     Subject: Re:I declined these invites -- What would you do?
I would be happy to bring cash - one less thing to worry about.
Anonymous
Post 04/09/2015 01:16     Subject: I declined these invites -- What would you do?
Anonymous wrote:It not just falling on the ice though, is it? Its falling on the ice amongst people wearing blades on the bottom of their skates.

Face + skate = mess


I am at an ice rink twice a week with my daughter, for a minimum of two hours each time if not longer. We've been going for eight years. In all that time I've seen a couple of injuries to fingers, but nobody has ever gotten a blade to the face. My own child basically tripped forward throwing a trick and belly flopped onto the ice, and although she scared me by staying down for more seconds I thought was reasonable, her face was totally fine and she only got bruises on her hips and ribs, and nobody ran over her.

Generally when little kids who are non-skaters fall, they fall onto their knees or onto their butts.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2015 23:40     Subject: I declined these invites -- What would you do?
I would've stopped at the request for cash and simply cut those people out of my life. Poor kid.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2015 23:23     Subject: I declined these invites -- What would you do?
The skating wouldn't bother me as much- a helmet and maybe some wrist guards if you're worried. Most little kids (and some adults) cling to the side.

The money and Valentines night for a party is weird. I like donating solely to a charity but going halfies with the birthday girl isn't classy.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2015 22:41     Subject: I declined these invites -- What would you do?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It not just falling on the ice though, is it? Its falling on the ice amongst people wearing blades on the bottom of their skates.

Face + skate = mess


I grew up skating in Canada. I've probably spent thousands of hours on the ice, and I've never seen someone injured in that manner by another skater.


A party of 20 x 5 year olds, none of whom have skated before = higher chance of this happening than in Canada where you're born with skates on your toes.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2015 22:40     Subject: I declined these invites -- What would you do?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:

Just curious as to what others would do in a similar situation. Just an FYI, we never invited this girl to our DD's parties.


I would decline an invitation to a birthday party I did not want my daughter to go to.

I would not post on DCUM about it in detail.


That's a fair point.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2015 21:51     Subject: I declined these invites -- What would you do?
Anonymous wrote:

Just curious as to what others would do in a similar situation. Just an FYI, we never invited this girl to our DD's parties.


I would decline an invitation to a birthday party I did not want my daughter to go to.

I would not post on DCUM about it in detail.
Anonymous
Post 04/08/2015 21:47     Subject: I declined these invites -- What would you do?
Anonymous wrote:It not just falling on the ice though, is it? Its falling on the ice amongst people wearing blades on the bottom of their skates.

Face + skate = mess


I grew up skating in Canada. I've probably spent thousands of hours on the ice, and I've never seen someone injured in that manner by another skater.