Anonymous wrote:We also have a soon to be 5 year old who sounds very similar to your son. He does OT and is an unrepentant class drop-out. He dropped out of, or refused to go at all- martial arts, swim classes, soccer, softball, gymnastics. It was an exercise in frustration for me until I just said eff it and forget about classes.

The one thing that does seem to be working is semi-private swim lessons at a private indoor swim club. We're not members so it's somewhat expensive, but he loves to be in the water and he goes with his sister and her friend. Sometimes it's just him and his sister. As others have said, if your son really enjoys the water (and of course, swimming is a necessary skill), maybe biting the bullet and paying for private or semi-private lessons might be good.

A LOT of kids with receptive speech delays, ADHD, or who have executive functioning issues do much better, especially early on, in one-on-one or small group settings. Too many visual/auditory inputs, not having skills broken down into simple steps, too many other bodies can spell disaster.

Anonymous wrote:DS had very similar symptoms and is now almost 10. Tried a variety of things from about your kid's age with most success in 1:1 swim lessons, 1:1 horse riding lessons (until he figured out it was a "girl's" sport), and Taekwondo. Last fall was the first time DS was able to self regulate and listen well enough to do soccer, so we've added it to the list, which is good because it gives him a bit more social currency now that his peers don't hang out on swing sets much anymore.

TKD has been tremendously useful in centering him, getting him to listen & having him feel successful. Horse riding was a long shot, but honestly, when you're on top of a fast moving 800 lb animal, you have to pay attention & DS got to be quite good. Wish more boys still did this

You may want to tell your DS that there will be around 20 girls for every boy at horse events. That alone should be an incentive to keep riding when he's a teenager.

We did private swimming lessons.

I think gymnastics would actually be great for your kid, but it'd have to be 1:1. I tried a class with my autistic 4.5 year old, and it was a disaster. Group classes are just not possible yet. We are starting him on swim lessons in a couple of weeks, and this is also 1:1. I know, the money just disappears into a black hole.

DS had very similar symptoms and is now almost 10. Tried a variety of things from about your kid's age with most success in 1:1 swim lessons, 1:1 horse riding lessons (until he figured out it was a "girl's" sport), and Taekwondo. Last fall was the first time DS was able to self regulate and listen well enough to do soccer, so we've added it to the list, which is good because it gives him a bit more social currency now that his peers don't hang out on swing sets much anymore.

TKD has been tremendously useful in centering him, getting him to listen & having him feel successful. Horse riding was a long shot, but honestly, when you're on top of a fast moving 800 lb animal, you have to pay attention & DS got to be quite good. Wish more boys still did this

We also have a soon to be 5 year old who sounds very similar to your son. He does OT and is an unrepentant class drop-out. He dropped out of, or refused to go at all- martial arts, swim classes, soccer, softball, gymnastics. It was an exercise in frustration for me until I just said eff it and forget about classes.

The one thing that does seem to be working is semi-private swim lessons at a private indoor swim club. We're not members so it's somewhat expensive, but he loves to be in the water and he goes with his sister and her friend. Sometimes it's just him and his sister. As others have said, if your son really enjoys the water (and of course, swimming is a necessary skill), maybe biting the bullet and paying for private or semi-private lessons might be good.

I didn't have a hyperactive child, but the reverse - completely dreamy and hypotonic. So nothing worked at that age, because he wouldn't listen to the directions, and when the instructor repeated them to him, his hypotonia would make it difficult for him to actually do the movements.

Basically, I held off on extracurriculars until he was older. Now at 9 he's on the team track in gymnastics!

Just to reiterate a previous point: your child does not need to be enrolled in ANY extracurricular activities. Especially as the weather warms (we hope and pray) and playgrounds beckon, let him run around! NT or Special Needs: Running around, preferably with a friend, can be the best way to "learn." Explore different playgrounds and nature centers (there are nice trails in back of the Nature Center at Rock Creek Park in DC). People kept telling me to throw my VERY bouncy and active daughter into soccer or gymnastics or swimming or karate or dancing or or and after about two or three classes, she'd had enough. She wanted to run around: a minute here, two minutes there, ten whole minutes on a swing. That's where she was, developmentally. Saved me a pile of money just to stop listening to people's questions.
You can always make things up, too ("We go to Joy of Motion twice a week." "We have private tennis and golf lessons on weekends." What are they going to do, check up on you?)
I didn't realize this needless pressure until a mother of a brilliant, kind boy "confessed" that he wasn't in any extracurricular activity. "He doesn't want to go, and we can't really afford it." She seemed so ASHAMED. My goodness, if your son doesn't want to go to Gymboree or whatever, then don't go.
On a nice sunny day, go to the zoo. Call it an extracurricular activity. : >

Private swim lessons, learning to ride and then riding bikes.

Martial Arts, swimming, rowing, Krav Maga