Anonymous wrote:I'm 40, and my girlfriends and I have been debating this for 25+ years. In all of those years and hundreds of incidences or not call back there was only ONE in which the guy was into her but got in a car accident, sustained a head injury and didn't call because he was in the hospital. In all of the rest: he's just not that into you.

Oh gosh, thanks for that! It's funny and a reality check. I'm the Op and it's not even that I like him sooo much, it's just the not knowing how much of myself to invest in this, you know?

NP here. I don’t mean to hijack either! Thank you OP (and the other PP) for posting as I found this thread helpful for my related situation.

I told my bf that I needed to take a break from the relationship, and we agreed to check back in with each other in a few weeks to see where we were. Well a few weeks passed, and I checked in and offered to see him if he wanted to talk in person. He agreed that he did and then...nothing.

I'm seeing what the pps said, and it reinforces the painful truth that if he wanted to see me, he would. It's that simple. I don't want to put my feelings at risk by reaching out again when his silence speaks volumes.

I guess it's time to move on, sadly.

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Anonymous wrote:For the pp who jumped in, do not text him! Believe people when they say a guy will call/ text if really interested no matter how busy or how far away. I know it is so hard to hear but it is the truth.

Ugh. . . thanks. But I texted him. I am assuming he is not interested but just thought I should give it one last try. I don't think I will hear from him.

No worries, OP. There's nothing wrong with texting him, even if he doesn't respond.

Especially if it gives you peace of mind that you tried/make it clear you were open to remaining in touch. You never know though....I've been surprised before.

Thanks! I am not the OP, I am the other PP who hijacked OP's thread (sorry again OP).

I did text him (I asked him if he was free tomorrow night) and he texted back saying that he was still out of town until Monday. He didn't suggest that we should get together when he returns so that is not really a good sign. I am not upset that I texted him though. At least he knows I am thinking about him.

I hope you've got some peace of mind now. You are thinking about him but sadly he doesn't seem to be thinking about you. Also next time you do a check in text, make it more of a 'how was your trip' rather than a 'lets go out tomorrow.' I think you won't hear too much more from him, but it's good because now you know and you can move on to bigger and better things

Agree with you 100%! I don't think he's thinking of me at all. I made a fool of myself but at least I know now!

Don't feel foolish! Sometimes we've just gotta know for sure. I wouldn't sweat it.

He would find the 30 seconds it takes to send a text if he was interested. If he was interested, he would even go as far as making a phone call. I regret spending so much mental space of men not deserving of it over the years.

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Anonymous wrote:For the pp who jumped in, do not text him! Believe people when they say a guy will call/ text if really interested no matter how busy or how far away. I know it is so hard to hear but it is the truth.

Ugh. . . thanks. But I texted him. I am assuming he is not interested but just thought I should give it one last try. I don't think I will hear from him.

No worries, OP. There's nothing wrong with texting him, even if he doesn't respond.

Especially if it gives you peace of mind that you tried/make it clear you were open to remaining in touch. You never know though....I've been surprised before.

Thanks! I am not the OP, I am the other PP who hijacked OP's thread (sorry again OP).

I did text him (I asked him if he was free tomorrow night) and he texted back saying that he was still out of town until Monday. He didn't suggest that we should get together when he returns so that is not really a good sign. I am not upset that I texted him though. At least he knows I am thinking about him.

I hope you've got some peace of mind now. You are thinking about him but sadly he doesn't seem to be thinking about you. Also next time you do a check in text, make it more of a 'how was your trip' rather than a 'lets go out tomorrow.' I think you won't hear too much more from him, but it's good because now you know and you can move on to bigger and better things

Agree with you 100%! I don't think he's thinking of me at all. I made a fool of myself but at least I know now!

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Anonymous wrote:For the pp who jumped in, do not text him! Believe people when they say a guy will call/ text if really interested no matter how busy or how far away. I know it is so hard to hear but it is the truth.

Ugh. . . thanks. But I texted him. I am assuming he is not interested but just thought I should give it one last try. I don't think I will hear from him.

No worries, OP. There's nothing wrong with texting him, even if he doesn't respond.

Especially if it gives you peace of mind that you tried/make it clear you were open to remaining in touch. You never know though....I've been surprised before.

Thanks! I am not the OP, I am the other PP who hijacked OP's thread (sorry again OP).

I did text him (I asked him if he was free tomorrow night) and he texted back saying that he was still out of town until Monday. He didn't suggest that we should get together when he returns so that is not really a good sign. I am not upset that I texted him though. At least he knows I am thinking about him.

I hope you've got some peace of mind now. You are thinking about him but sadly he doesn't seem to be thinking about you. Also next time you do a check in text, make it more of a 'how was your trip' rather than a 'lets go out tomorrow.' I think you won't hear too much more from him, but it's good because now you know and you can move on to bigger and better things

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Anonymous wrote:For the pp who jumped in, do not text him! Believe people when they say a guy will call/ text if really interested no matter how busy or how far away. I know it is so hard to hear but it is the truth.

Ugh. . . thanks. But I texted him. I am assuming he is not interested but just thought I should give it one last try. I don't think I will hear from him.

No worries, OP. There's nothing wrong with texting him, even if he doesn't respond.

Especially if it gives you peace of mind that you tried/make it clear you were open to remaining in touch. You never know though....I've been surprised before.

Thanks! I am not the OP, I am the other PP who hijacked OP's thread (sorry again OP).

I did text him (I asked him if he was free tomorrow night) and he texted back saying that he was still out of town until Monday. He didn't suggest that we should get together when he returns so that is not really a good sign. I am not upset that I texted him though. At least he knows I am thinking about him.

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Anonymous wrote:For the pp who jumped in, do not text him! Believe people when they say a guy will call/ text if really interested no matter how busy or how far away. I know it is so hard to hear but it is the truth.

Ugh. . . thanks. But I texted him. I am assuming he is not interested but just thought I should give it one last try. I don't think I will hear from him.

No worries, OP. There's nothing wrong with texting him, even if he doesn't respond.

Especially if it gives you peace of mind that you tried/make it clear you were open to remaining in touch. You never know though....I've been surprised before.

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Anonymous wrote:For the pp who jumped in, do not text him! Believe people when they say a guy will call/ text if really interested no matter how busy or how far away. I know it is so hard to hear but it is the truth.

Ugh. . . thanks. But I texted him. I am assuming he is not interested but just thought I should give it one last try. I don't think I will hear from him.

No worries, OP. There's nothing wrong with texting him, even if he doesn't respond.

Anonymous wrote:For the pp who jumped in, do not text him! Believe people when they say a guy will call/ text if really interested no matter how busy or how far away. I know it is so hard to hear but it is the truth.

Ugh. . . thanks. But I texted him. I am assuming he is not interested but just thought I should give it one last try. I don't think I will hear from him.

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Anonymous wrote:Guy here: no way to know. Most men have encountered situations where they were really into someone, but blew it by appearing overeager. He might just not be that into you, or he might be playing it cool.

NP here and I'm in kind of a similar situation with a guy. We've gone out three times now and I really like him but he is so hard to read. After our last date he went out of town and told me he'd call me when he got back. I haven't heard from him. Is it okay to text him? Or should I wait? I definitely don't want to appear desperate.

OP, sorry if I hijacked your thread but I was going to post this exact question and you beat me to it!

Do you know when he was supposed to be back in town? If that time has already passed and he's back I might text him, but I'd make a small mental note that he didn't reach out to me when he said he would.

He never told me when he was coming back so I'm not sure. I suppose I have nothing to lose (but my pride) if I reach out to him. The worst that will happen is he ignores my text or says no. I just don't want to come off as desperate and pathetic.

Oh, this could be nothing but it could be everything. Text him if you will just be waiting in suspense if you don't, but prepare yourself to not get the outcome you want.

I agree. But I don't see anything wrong with sending a single text asking how the trip went. Just don't send multiple texts before he replies.

For the pp who jumped in, do not text him! Believe people when they say a guy will call/ text if really interested no matter how busy or how far away. I know it is so hard to hear but it is the truth.

Anonymous wrote:Just not that into you. Sorry, it sucks. But someone else will be, so hang in there.

+1.

For some it could mean he's not into you and for others it could be that he's trying not to seem desperate. I don't think girls need to wait for guys to be the one to follow up, however only one text/call until he calls you. I dated a guy who like to play the hot/cold game because of insecurity issues he had. (He would randomly distance himself after feeling he let his guard down too much.) SOOOOO not worth the time I put in to that relationship. Don't let yourself fall for a guy who plays games.

Also, going out of town a d never calling again is so common it's almost a cliche. Did you sleep with him prior to him leaving?