Why can't they fedex it and have him sign in the presence of a notary/lawyer?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is entirely up to your husband and his parents.

You have no say in the matter unless he is signing something that compromises your current assets or takes on new liabilities that would affect your marital financial status.

She has no say in what his parents decide to do with their money. But in a marriage, these are the kinds of things you share. You don't keep these kinds of secrets. That the parents want it kept a secret doesn't trouble me, it's that OP's husband is going along with it, and very obviously putting his parents ahead of his marriage. Even if whatever he's signing has zero implications for OP, because she is his wife OP's husband should be willing to open up to her and make sure she's included if for no other reason than to reassure OP that she's not being compromised in some way.

After he signs whatever he is going to sign, he should disclose to OP what he obligated himself to - assuming there was an obligation. He should not keep it a secret.

All I am saying is that whether he/his parents want OP there or reviewing the documents ahead of time or prior to him signing the document/s is a call OP's husband must make.

If I were the OP, I would tell her husband that he can go ahead with whatever they want him to sign as long as he does not compromise their current marital assets. He should also understand what he is signing and if he has any doubts that he should seek advice whether from OP or someone else who is qualified.

OP has the absolute right to ensure their marital assets are not impacted. Her husband has the absolute right to agree or disagree with anything his parents want him to sign that affects his rights with regard to their assets. OP has no say when it comes to the terms of disposition of his parents assets.

Keep in mind that OP has acknowledged that her relationship with her in-laws are/have been an issue.

you are just another bored wife who is wondering if you are getting any coin out of them.

Anonymous wrote:It is entirely up to your husband and his parents.

You have no say in the matter unless he is signing something that compromises your current assets or takes on new liabilities that would affect your marital financial status.

She has no say in what his parents decide to do with their money. But in a marriage, these are the kinds of things you share. You don't keep these kinds of secrets. That the parents want it kept a secret doesn't trouble me, it's that OP's husband is going along with it, and very obviously putting his parents ahead of his marriage. Even if whatever he's signing has zero implications for OP, because she is his wife OP's husband should be willing to open up to her and make sure she's included if for no other reason than to reassure OP that she's not being compromised in some way.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is entirely up to your husband and his parents.

You have no say in the matter unless he is signing something that compromises your current assets or takes on new liabilities that would affect your marital financial status.

OK, sure, but without knowing what he is going to sign, she has no clue whether he is going to be asked to sign "something that compromises your current assets or takes on new liabilities that would affect [their] marital financial status." Neither does he. She has a right to know. But this situation is mostly indicating a problem with the DH. He should be the one politely but firmly asking his parents to send him a copy. If they are really crazy and won't do that, he should reassure his wife that he won't sign anything without discussing it with her first. His "I'm going and I'm going to sign anything they tell me to" is ridiculous. Sorry, OP, I don't know what I would do about it, though. It sounds stressful.

Someone who lacks financial sophistication needs advice but he is the one who should make that call with the input of his wife or other person who has his interests in mind. If he does not want his wife involved that is up to him.

OP describes his parents as "assholes" and if they are even remotely aware of her views about them, I don't blame them for not wanting her around.

Perhaps they don't trust her and if they are leaving him something it may be that they want to ensure that she does not get any access to those funds while married or in the event of a divorce. OP says "they" don't want the in-laws' money but that again is a call for her husband to make whether HE wants their money.

It is not that I am unsympathetic to OP's plight but these sort of family dynamics don't happen in a vacuum - there are aspects to OP's relationship with her in-laws that are coming into play in how the in-laws are approaching this is my conjecture.

+1 . This is between DH and his parents. Parents don't want her around because they think she is an 'asshole".

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is entirely up to your husband and his parents.

You have no say in the matter unless he is signing something that compromises your current assets or takes on new liabilities that would affect your marital financial status.

OK, sure, but without knowing what he is going to sign, she has no clue whether he is going to be asked to sign "something that compromises your current assets or takes on new liabilities that would affect [their] marital financial status." Neither does he. She has a right to know. But this situation is mostly indicating a problem with the DH. He should be the one politely but firmly asking his parents to send him a copy. If they are really crazy and won't do that, he should reassure his wife that he won't sign anything without discussing it with her first. His "I'm going and I'm going to sign anything they tell me to" is ridiculous. Sorry, OP, I don't know what I would do about it, though. It sounds stressful.

Someone who lacks financial sophistication needs advice but he is the one who should make that call with the input of his wife or other person who has his interests in mind. If he does not want his wife involved that is up to him.

OP describes his parents as "assholes" and if they are even remotely aware of her views about them, I don't blame them for not wanting her around.

Perhaps they don't trust her and if they are leaving him something it may be that they want to ensure that she does not get any access to those funds while married or in the event of a divorce. OP says "they" don't want the in-laws' money but that again is a call for her husband to make whether HE wants their money.

It is not that I am unsympathetic to OP's plight but these sort of family dynamics don't happen in a vacuum - there are aspects to OP's relationship with her in-laws that are coming into play in how the in-laws are approaching this is my conjecture.

Op here. You are probably right. They are Jewish and I am not and they refuse to accept me because I am not Jewish. This lack of accepting his wife has obviously caused a strain in their relationship for obvious reasons.

Anonymous wrote:Maybe they are making him executor or giving him power of attorney?

That doesn't require his signature. We set up my siblings as executor/power of attorney and just let them know by phone.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is entirely up to your husband and his parents.

You have no say in the matter unless he is signing something that compromises your current assets or takes on new liabilities that would affect your marital financial status.

OK, sure, but without knowing what he is going to sign, she has no clue whether he is going to be asked to sign "something that compromises your current assets or takes on new liabilities that would affect [their] marital financial status." Neither does he. She has a right to know. But this situation is mostly indicating a problem with the DH. He should be the one politely but firmly asking his parents to send him a copy. If they are really crazy and won't do that, he should reassure his wife that he won't sign anything without discussing it with her first. His "I'm going and I'm going to sign anything they tell me to" is ridiculous. Sorry, OP, I don't know what I would do about it, though. It sounds stressful.

Someone who lacks financial sophistication needs advice but he is the one who should make that call with the input of his wife or other person who has his interests in mind. If he does not want his wife involved that is up to him.

OP describes his parents as "assholes" and if they are even remotely aware of her views about them, I don't blame them for not wanting her around.

Perhaps they don't trust her and if they are leaving him something it may be that they want to ensure that she does not get any access to those funds while married or in the event of a divorce. OP says "they" don't want the in-laws' money but that again is a call for her husband to make whether HE wants their money.

It is not that I am unsympathetic to OP's plight but these sort of family dynamics don't happen in a vacuum - there are aspects to OP's relationship with her in-laws that are coming into play in how the in-laws are approaching this is my conjecture.

Maybe they are making him executor or giving him power of attorney?

How would we know? Are you for real?

Anonymous wrote:It is entirely up to your husband and his parents.

You have no say in the matter unless he is signing something that compromises your current assets or takes on new liabilities that would affect your marital financial status.

OK, sure, but without knowing what he is going to sign, she has no clue whether he is going to be asked to sign "something that compromises your current assets or takes on new liabilities that would affect [their] marital financial status." Neither does he. She has a right to know. But this situation is mostly indicating a problem with the DH. He should be the one politely but firmly asking his parents to send him a copy. If they are really crazy and won't do that, he should reassure his wife that he won't sign anything without discussing it with her first. His "I'm going and I'm going to sign anything they tell me to" is ridiculous. Sorry, OP, I don't know what I would do about it, though. It sounds stressful.

It is entirely up to your husband and his parents.

You have no say in the matter unless he is signing something that compromises your current assets or takes on new liabilities that would affect your marital financial status.

I would guess that they are not evenly dividing the estate between siblings (if he has any) or are leaving him very little so their lawyer wants him to sign something now to avoid his contesting the will after they die.

If he doesn't want their money then it's no big deal, but ridiculous to fly out there without knowing what's going on or asking to see the papers first.

Your husband is "so stupid" and his parents are "assholes." You married into a great family!

He is not signing anything. He is either lying to you or they are lying to him.

When was the last time he visited it. It might just be a way to get him to actually visit.