Is this real? I'm having a hard time believing it is.

But in case it is, here's my two cents --

Having semen come out of you after sex is what happens. Microscopic sperm are still in there and have a chance to do what they need to do. You do not need to lay on your back or stay still or avoid the bathroom after sex.

You have cramping and periods after sex -- two weeks after sex? This doesn't even make sense. You're only having sex once a month and then having a period two weeks later with no more sex after that?

"Pregnancy symptoms" you're experiencing before your period are actually PMS. Sore and swollen breasts, minor bloating, crankiness, etc., are all signs of PMS. And they rarely happen 3 weeks into pregnancy, so they really aren't "signs" of anything but your period coming. (When I was actually got pregnant, I didn't have any PMS-type symptoms before my period was due.)

Everything sounds very normal in terms of what's happening to your body.

How long have you been trying? And how seriously? How often are you having sex? If you have irregular periods, it's really hard to tell when you might need to have sex to get pregnant. On a "typical," average cycle, you would ovulate on the day about 14 days before your next period is due (i.e. 14 days into your cycle if a 28-day cycle or 16 days if it's a 30-day cycle).

Being overweight can make it harder to get pregnant (though I don't know why). Working on losing some weight will be healthy for you and help you have a healthier pregnancy when you do get pregnant. Do it slowly and in a healthy way -- not just to lose a bunch of weight. Focus on health and exercise rather than weight loss specifically. Walk more, go swimming (very easy on the joints, something you can do for your whole pregnancy and feel good because you're buoyant in the water, and if you're a DC resident, you get to use the indoor pools for free). Focus on healthier food choices with more vegetables.

If you're serious about trying, are you taking a prenatal vitamin? You can and should start taking one prior to getting pregnant. It will increase your folic acid stores, which is really helpful in preventing birth defects. They are also extremely high in iron, which will help with anemia. The anemia itself may play a role in this and should be dealt with soon because you'll only get more anemic while pregnant (I was not anemic pre-pregnancy but got anemic during pregnancy, which is very common).

And slow down! There's no need to get pregnant before you get married!

Anonymous wrote:Me and my boyfriend have been together 3 1/2 years. Me and my boyfriend before that were 2 1/2 years. Both guys I trust and am close to their families and know they would make great dads weather we are together or not. I'm not in a rush but I want to know. I know fertility treatments and all that are expensive and so are adoption. So I want to know if this is something we need to start saving for.

The heacy bleeding and cramps happens about two weeks or so after we had sex.

Are you typing all your posts fast? Is that why they read like a 10 year old wrote them?

And this part "and know they would make great dads wHEther we are together or not" - OMG, how about just be with the dad and not worry about what kind of father he is after you split. Aim higher.

Read Taking Charge of your Fertility. Here is a link to it on Amazon:
http://www.amazon.com/Taking-Charge-Fertility-Anniversary-Edition/dp/0060881909#


When you are done reading that book - come back with questions.

Anonymous wrote:Me and my boyfriend have been together 3 1/2 years. Me and my boyfriend before that were 2 1/2 years. Both guys I trust and am close to their families and know they would make great dads weather we are together or not. I'm not in a rush but I want to know. I know fertility treatments and all that are expensive and so are adoption. So I want to know if this is something we need to start saving for.

The heacy bleeding and cramps happens about two weeks or so after we had sex.

But how often are you having sex? If bleeding is happening two weeks after sex, I assume you're not having sex more than once every two weeks to know this? Once a month? Less than that? How often do you get your period?

I noticed you skipped most of my questions, and I don't know why that is, but all of them were serious questions that have bearing on the answer to your question.

A total of 6 years, even assuming no break between boyfriends. You've been trying to get pregnant since you were 18?

I don't understand why you're trying to get pregnant now if your boyfriend will be gone for a year. He would miss the birth!

Are you at least going to get engaged? Seriously, what's so bad about getting married first?

1. Start tracking your cycles. A PP recommended Taking Charge of Your Fertility. This along with a free app like fertility friend is a good place to start.
2. Read up on PCOS (the soulcysters forum is a friendly and helpful place to start).
3. Once you've tracked your cycles for a few months you can use this information as support when you ask your doctor about PCOS or other possible diagnoses. If your doctor isn't receptive, find a new one.
4. It's never too early for you and your partner to start planning for kids: save money, talk about your parenting beliefs, who's responsible for what, will you work or stay home, discipline, etc. Maybe you've already done these things! If so keep going. I know at 24 I had not considered most of the things I now know are important to decide before having a kid.

Know what else is expensive? A kid. So start saving. You will need it regardless.

Me and my boyfriend have been together 3 1/2 years. Me and my boyfriend before that were 2 1/2 years. Both guys I trust and am close to their families and know they would make great dads weather we are together or not. I'm not in a rush but I want to know. I know fertility treatments and all that are expensive and so are adoption. So I want to know if this is something we need to start saving for.

The heacy bleeding and cramps happens about two weeks or so after we had sex.