The wife is a bitch. Who criticizes their husband at the dinner table with the MIL there? If she knows that MIL already doesn't like her ass, the PA move is jumping all over hubby during the visit. Then she does the "go to Florida" but now I wanna go.

That said, man the fuck up. Tell your wife that MIL doesn't like you for a reason - reasons that you apparently overlook because you love her and have to live with her whereas your MIL is a grown woman as well and can do and say as she pleases. I wish someone would criticize my son in front of me and be a bitch about it; so because I'm just the MIL I'm supposed to go run off in a corner and meekly stand by?!! I doubt it. Get over yourselves. And tell her you don't defend her because her actions aren't defensible. Tell her to STFU.

...loving wife AND mother

Let's take your mother out of this equation for a minute. From your description, your wife is criticizing your weight and giving you "laser eyes of death" over really minor mistakes. Is she like this all the time, or just when your mother is around?

What might be the source of all the hostility she has for you right now? Is it all about your mother, or is she generally hostile?

People do have a tendency to marry their parents, despite wanting the opposite for themselves. Nothing that you wrote about your mom sounds totally out of line to me (I don't know if I could keep my mouth shut if my DIL was being so nasty to my son either, and my son is only 2) but I sense that there is a lot more going on than these two interactions.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like your wife and mother are very alike.

His mother was absolutely correct in the things she said. His wife is the issue.

It doesn't matter if she was correct, it wasn't her place to butt in. If the husband had a problem with his wife, he should talk to his wife about it, not have his mommy speak up for him.

Hypothetical: You are with a married couple who, for some reason unknown to you, are obviously angry at each other. One gives the other "laser eyes of death" or some such subjective nonsense. Do you pipe up and tell the person to calm down (even if you think she should)? Or do you stay the hell out of it because it ain't your business?

And yeah, you only get one mother, but she's not the one warming your bed at night and partnering with you on the kids. Pick whichever you like, but be aware that by letting your mom snipe at your wife, you are, indeed, taking sides.

Remember, you can always replace the wife but you can never replace your mother.

Don't let your wife whip you. It's unmanly and embarrassing.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God I love DCUM. His wife sound likes a bitch. His mom is trying to stick up for him, albeit going about it in the wrong way. And yet DCUM blames him and says he should put little love notes around the house to make his wife happier.

If a woman wrote in saying that her husband picked on her about her weight And got pissed because she prepare his coffee wrong, everyone would be calling him an asshole.

+1

Then again, I have little sympathy for grown-ass adults complaining about their partners. We don't choose our parents, but we sure as heck choose who we marry and have kids with. You made a choice, you live with its consequences.

Why are you on the Relationship Discussion forum then?

Anonymous wrote:God I love DCUM. His wife sound likes a bitch. His mom is trying to stick up for him, albeit going about it in the wrong way. And yet DCUM blames him and says he should put little love notes around the house to make his wife happier.

If a woman wrote in saying that her husband picked on her about her weight And got pissed because she prepare his coffee wrong, everyone would be calling him an asshole.

+1

Then again, I have little sympathy for grown-ass adults complaining about their partners. We don't choose our parents, but we sure as heck choose who we marry and have kids with. You made a choice, you live with its consequences.

Anonymous wrote:God I love DCUM. His wife sound likes a bitch. His mom is trying to stick up for him, albeit going about it in the wrong way. And yet DCUM blames him and says he should put little love notes around the house to make his wife happier.

If a woman wrote in saying that her husband picked on her about her weight And got pissed because she prepare his coffee wrong, everyone would be calling him an asshole.

No they wouldn't they would call the woman a fat ass and A baby for being defended by her parents.

I'm going to go the other posters who says it sounds like he married someone just like your mother. Ironically they are both hostile and you are passive aggressive. Go ahead and continue to play the victim it sounds like you love the drama between these two. Personally I think you all three are of equal fault based on the scenarios you described.

Anonymous wrote:Why did you give her a cup of coffee with milk instead of creamer, after she specifically asked for it? Sounds like you are the one being passive aggressive, not your wife.

An honest mistake and he gets the laser eyes of death?

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like your wife and mother are very alike.

His mother was absolutely correct in the things she said. His wife is the issue.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're 5' 12"?

+1
Isn't that usually just called 6'?

IKR?? I call troll..

Why did you give her a cup of coffee with milk instead of creamer, after she specifically asked for it? Sounds like you are the one being passive aggressive, not your wife.

The PA is DW offering for me to go with our children to see their grandmother and then complaining about being "alone."

5'11"

Enjoy your trip OP. You guys will probably have a fun time and the kids can get some grandma bonding time. FWIW, your wife sounds a little hard to please right now and could probably use some down time to pamper herself.

Anonymous wrote:You're 5' 12"?

+1
Isn't that usually just called 6'?