Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:21     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Anonymous wrote:190 is obese. I feel sorry for both you and your DH. You are physically mismatched.

OP, you need to lose weight and your DH needs to bulk up. Maybe you both need to hit the gym.


Um, what? I am 5'11 and at 205 had 26% body fat. Hardly obese.
Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:20     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Newsflash people! NP here but men hit on women all the time. It's not a big deal and certainly doesnt mean it's the woman's fault.

MAJOR sideeye at the casual misogyny going on here...


Wait a second, wait a second. This is a thing people do at work? To people who are married? Single, I understand, but "expressing sexual interest" in a married coworker is just not something that goes on in my workplace.


That's because you work in a convent, with a stick up your butt.


x2
Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:20     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Newsflash people! NP here but men hit on women all the time. It's not a big deal and certainly doesnt mean it's the woman's fault.

MAJOR sideeye at the casual misogyny going on here...


Not just misogyny. A lot of judgy-ness, in general.


Yup. I know it's DCUM and the posters arent exactly life of the party types, but still....
Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:18     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Newsflash people! NP here but men hit on women all the time. It's not a big deal and certainly doesnt mean it's the woman's fault.

MAJOR sideeye at the casual misogyny going on here...


Wait a second, wait a second. This is a thing people do at work? To people who are married? Single, I understand, but "expressing sexual interest" in a married coworker is just not something that goes on in my workplace.


That's because you work in a convent, with a stick up your butt.
Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:17     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You need to be in a more professional workplace. I can't imagine having multiple coworkers express sexual interest in a married female colleague. That's just a huge EEO catastrophe waiting to happen in most workplaces.


No shit. There would be mass firings.


Where do you work? "Expressing interest" is not harassment. OP has not indicated that it's unwelcome.


If this is the case, OP has bigger problems than being 40 pounds overweight.


Why? People flirt all the time. It doesn't necessarily mean anything.


I think flirting is different from "expressing sexual interest." I think of flirting as really low-level innocent stuff. Or maybe I am wrong?
Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:16     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Anonymous wrote:Newsflash people! NP here but men hit on women all the time. It's not a big deal and certainly doesnt mean it's the woman's fault.

MAJOR sideeye at the casual misogyny going on here...


Not just misogyny. A lot of judgy-ness, in general.
Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:16     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Anonymous wrote:Newsflash people! NP here but men hit on women all the time. It's not a big deal and certainly doesnt mean it's the woman's fault.

MAJOR sideeye at the casual misogyny going on here...


Wait a second, wait a second. This is a thing people do at work? To people who are married? Single, I understand, but "expressing sexual interest" in a married coworker is just not something that goes on in my workplace.
Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:15     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You need to be in a more professional workplace. I can't imagine having multiple coworkers express sexual interest in a married female colleague. That's just a huge EEO catastrophe waiting to happen in most workplaces.


No shit. There would be mass firings.


Where do you work? "Expressing interest" is not harassment. OP has not indicated that it's unwelcome.


If this is the case, OP has bigger problems than being 40 pounds overweight.


Why? People flirt all the time. It doesn't necessarily mean anything.
Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:13     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Newsflash people! NP here but men hit on women all the time. It's not a big deal and certainly doesnt mean it's the woman's fault.

MAJOR sideeye at the casual misogyny going on here...
Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:12     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You need to be in a more professional workplace. I can't imagine having multiple coworkers express sexual interest in a married female colleague. That's just a huge EEO catastrophe waiting to happen in most workplaces.


No shit. There would be mass firings.


Where do you work? "Expressing interest" is not harassment. OP has not indicated that it's unwelcome.


If this is the case, OP has bigger problems than being 40 pounds overweight.
Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:09     Subject: Re:Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
How did your married coworker even think that it was ok to hit on you? You are being too promiscuous in your conversation with them if they think that they can take this liberty with you.
Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:02     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Anonymous wrote:DH doesn't need to do anything. 135 may be healthy for him. If she doesn't like him at 135, then she obviously wouldn't have married him.

Sorry, OP, but 190 is a bit heavy. Your coworkers are either humoring you, or they are assuming that you will be an easy, undemanding lay ("fat chicks try harder," etc.).

Try to avoid falling into the trap of becoming resentful and letting yourself off the hook and insisting that he just be attracted to you even if he isn't. Just accept that you gained weight, for reasons that may be totally understandable, and that your skinny husband probably doesn't like it. Don't be ashamed; just go on a diet and hit the gym. A mountain is moved one stone at a time.



DH absolutely does. Unless he is a midget, 135 is way too little for a grown man.

Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:02     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Anonymous wrote:If you are fat and being rejected by your husband, then you probably seem like an easy screw to your coworkers. Sorry but that's how it looks to me.


+1

Harsh, but true. The vultures are circling. They know you want validation.
Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:02     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Anonymous wrote:I dont know what to tell you. I think it's gross that your DH would be turned off by such a small weight gain after kids, especially considering your height.

What's small about 40 pounds? 20 were after the baby.
Anonymous
Post 01/19/2015 00:01     Subject: Married coworkers want me but I'm to heavy for hubby
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:190 is obese. I feel sorry for both you and your DH. You are physically mismatched.

OP, you need to lose weight and your DH needs to bulk up. Maybe you both need to hit the gym.


Actually, no. 190lbs on a woman that is 5'10 is overweight, but not obese. Her BMI is 27.7. The top of the range for normal weight is 24.9. Obese is 30.0 or higher.


It's heavy for a woman, sorry. Even for a man, that would be a little pudgy, unless he was muscular.