Anonymous wrote:I am not sure what's more annoying... Dog people who take their dogs everywhere regardless of other people's wishes, or people who have irrational fears and can't relax. I'd have probably silently removed the dog and either put it outside or in the garage. Is anyone asked I'd have reminded them about our repeated conversations regarding what dogs would be present. It really sounds like a pissing match with the dog owner wanting to be an asshole dog owner.

Where in the world do you come up with that?

OP, you could mention it now. It might be better though to ask next time who else will be there with dogs.

I tend to agree that the dog was leashed, and your ds could have been told to avoid that area. Not ideal for your ds but it wasn't your house.. sometimes you have to improvise.

It's after the fact. Work w/your son re: the fear. No reason it should impact everyones' lives. Your son is not that special.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is on SIL she was host hosting, I spoke with her almost daily about preparing my DS for the visit and she was aware that the high energy dog was coming but forgot to mention it.

Your SIL conveniently "forgot." And who ties an energetic dog to a couch. Your SIL is a piece of work. She set you up.

+1

Who forgets a high energy dog is coming over?

Someone who is busy and stressed preparing dinner and getting the house ready for guests, that's who.

I think it depends on how old your child was. My son is very afraid of dogs. When he was younger, I expected my family members to keep their dogs away from him (the dogs are generally well behaved), because he was incapable of managing his fear. As he got older, we expected that he would become more capable of dealing with his fear/the situation, and in fact, he did.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Either she's clueless or she was completely overwhelmed with things and really forgot. Plus she must secretly think your child is overreacting - a lot of dogowners don't get that their dog is a horror.

We are hypervigilant with our 4 year old DC when we go to a friend's 90 lbs dog that jumps on people and licks them aggresssively (and barks your ear off). Our older DC can fend the dog off with his elbow but the little one can't - so we ask that my friend crate the dog as soon as we arrive.

There is a bit of my SILs thinking that my child is over reacting and it is their responsibility to make my child not fearful of dogs.

Not saying that your SIL handled this appropriately. At all. But maybe she was trying to help desensitize your son and make him more comfortable around dogs? I have dogs and on occasion we've had a dog fearing kid over and after being around our dogs the child becomes less afraid. Some even wind up wanting a dog themselves.

Anonymous wrote:If you know any proud dog people, here's a gift idea for them:
www.funnydogsrule.com

how is that site even funny it is stupid

I fine it odd that some PPs want to blame the situation on "entitled" dog owners. The brother didn't do anything wrong. His dog was obviously welcome at the SIL's house. If she is fine with it, then it is on the OP to prepare her child or decline the invitation. OP did nothing wrong because she did try to prepare her child. The "high energy" dog was somewhat confined to the couch area. Perhaps the only one in the wrong is the SIL who didn't warn the OP. However, it could easily have been an honest mistake.

In any case, there is nothing so terrible about this situation and it doesn't require some huge talk. Next time, OP should be sure to double-check with the SIL about whether or not both dogs will be there. Problem solved.

In the meanwhile, OP should keep helping her child get over his fear of dogs. He will likely encounter them in plenty of settings and a paralyzing fear will limit him in situations where there are pets around. It sounds like she is doing that. All good.

Yes, I have a dog. No, I don't bring her to people's houses. But that's because I don't want to stress my dog out. Kids aren't usually properly trained how to interact with dogs. They lunge, smother, poke, and tease...because they are kids and don't know better. And while my dog is very docile and highly tolerant about being smothered with toddler kisses, she is still an animal and I have to do my part to ensure neither kids nor my dog are stressed out.

Why do people bring their dogs to other people's houses? I have a dog. She doesn't come with us when we go to family events at someone else's house. I wouldn't say anything to anyone. I would ask more specifically next year of the host family and of the family with the offending dog.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is on SIL she was host hosting, I spoke with her almost daily about preparing my DS for the visit and she was aware that the high energy dog was coming but forgot to mention it.

Your SIL conveniently "forgot." And who ties an energetic dog to a couch. Your SIL is a piece of work. She set you up.

+1

Who forgets a high energy dog is coming over?

If you know any proud dog people, here's a gift idea for them:
www.funnydogsrule.com

It sounds like she forgot the dog was coming /didn't know the dog was coming and met both you and dog owner halfway by tying it to the couch

Anonymous wrote:It is on SIL she was host hosting, I spoke with her almost daily about preparing my DS for the visit and she was aware that the high energy dog was coming but forgot to mention it.

Your SIL conveniently "forgot." And who ties an energetic dog to a couch. Your SIL is a piece of work. She set you up.

It is on SIL she was host hosting, I spoke with her almost daily about preparing my DS for the visit and she was aware that the high energy dog was coming but forgot to mention it.

God, I hate dog people. So freaking entitled.

I'm not sure why this is on your SIL when it's your brother's dog. Doesn't your brother know your son is scared of his dog?