You are missing spending time with your kids; at a park, at home, just playing and hanging out.

Put them in Kumon.

Your kids are missing sporting activities and enrichment opportunities OP. Maybe trade with other families so you can get your kids out a bit. My DH and I always worked FT, but also always managed to have the best classes available to our kids.

After being in school all day the last thing many kids want is more organized activities.

After school there's snack, play/TV, homework, dinner, more play/TV, and bed. Sometimes we play games. We still do books together before bed.

We are beginning to do sports, but its no more then an afternoon or two a week and a Saturday. I try not to overschedule them.

I was going to work fewer hours or re-arrange my schedule in order to be home after school for my 1st and 3rd grader but they like the aftercare program. I decided instead to try and ran more money now and then when they are in junior high school not work afternoons. I don't think there is even after school care at that age and I think they really need a lot if supervision at that age. I am hoping that our house will become a hang out house for their friends since I will be home and available to pick them up and drive them around.

The only thing my kids do after school is ride the bus home, do their homework, and park themselves in front of Minecraft or NOVA. Unless they have sports practice or a game/meet -- then it gets crazy, schedule-wise. It sounds like your kids are socially engaged and having fun, which is great. Don't sweat it!

I work but have a flexible schedule. We usually have an after school activity or play outside most days after school. You aren't missing anything, just probably have a different schedule, maybe you have more activities on the weekend mornings or maybe yours go to bed later than mine.

I worried about this too, until I had a lengthy period where I wasn't working, and then I realized they basically do the same thing (play, hang out with friends) regardless of whether it is me supervising or not.

Also, I was looking forward to that after school time bonding I had heard about when I started picking them up, hearing about their day,etc. Did not happen. The kids kept to the pattern we established a long time ago -- conversations about what happened at school continued to happen at night, as I sat on their beds in the dark saying goodnight. I think my kids need time to think about their day, and right after school was too soon to talk. I assumed that conversation would move, but it didn't.

I used to really worry about this, and then I talked with some SAHM and realized that what their kids do is play with other kids, often on the same playground. Or they schedule tons of play dates. to me, aftercare is one big play date. plus I think my son has learned some valuable social skills there.

In nice weather, you're probably missing some time at the local park. But if your kid gets to go outside at aftercare, it's basically the same thing.

Also, judging from the schedule at our ballet studio and the county rec system, a lot of people do activities then.

My kids usually go to the playground and play with the kids who are there for aftercare! So, same thing pretty much. Over the years, we've also used that time for language class, music lessons and sports, plus homework, bike rides, and lounging around doing nothing (not all at the same time, of course). And once DC wanted to take an on-line class and we were able to do it because we has those hours free. But mostly, they want to play with friends when homework load allows. Then again, some days they just want to come home and chill. I like those days.