The kid needs to learn to nap on the run. I can not fathom, after 4 kids, planning all of those years around nap time, and being a prisoner in my home.

I'm sure if we could only parent as perfectly as you do, our kids would learn to 'nap on the run'. You clearly have superior skills and are probably awesome at everything you do. I aspire.

I think what they'd really like is some sort of Downton Abbey type scenario where nanny (guess that's my role!) presents the children (in fresh white cotton) for an hour or so, and then everyone proceeds to cocktails.

Lots of grandparents are that way. I guess I can't really blame them - being with little kids can be exhausting, and maybe they are just not up for it any more now that they are older. I do feel that it is the role of the spouse to take on more in terms of dealing with the kids when you visit the other spouse's parents - after all, it is more important for the child (in this case your DH) to see his parents than the DIL or SIL. My DH does it for me, and I do it for him.

Anonymous wrote:
I think what they'd really like is some sort of Downton Abbey type scenario where nanny (guess that's my role!) presents the children (in fresh white cotton) for an hour or so, and then everyone proceeds to cocktails.

(Which sounds sort of awesome--were I not nanny--but is about 180 degrees from the current chaos that is our life!)

See, that's what MY parents want, only in their home, so they can show off dear little GD during cocktail hour. I make sure to always have my own vehicle, so when they become annoyed by my "non-participation" <- b/c I'm trying to entertain a 2YO during an endless happy hour - we can just escape. I would love to see the look on my mother's face if I brought a babysitter

This sounds like bliss to me. When my parents visit, they want to spend ALL DAY with us. They never do their own thing for a bit.

Don't skip naps. You're the one who has to deal with the aftermath.

The kid needs to learn to nap on the run. I can not fathom, after 4 kids, planning all of those years around nap time, and being a prisoner in my home.

Learning to sleep anywhere is a great gift you can give you children.

As for the IL's, suck it up and stay home, or spring for a sitter, if you know they are not kid people. They are not going to bend to your not being able to have your kids nap on the run. Nor should they be expected to.