Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 15:03     Subject: Re:is DH unreasonable?
and could have fixed it but didn't because they didn't feel like it.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 15:02     Subject: is DH unreasonable?
Anonymous wrote:

Is it mean that I teach my DC to deal with disappointments?

So, if your K cries because another kid won a prize and your kid didn't, would you run out and buy your DC a prize? Wow. That's teaching your DC ...oh what's it called... oh I know... the world revolves and caters to what you want.

But this is different. It's more like the time I realized that the function was formal, but I was wearing jeans and felt uncomfortable all day. I'm grown, so I didn't cry, but I sure would have been pissed if I was in that situation because someone else had messed up.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 15:02     Subject: is DH unreasonable?
Anonymous wrote:OP, you're just another angry wife coming to DCUM to get support against her horrible DH. Handle this face to face with your husband.


Haha, now OP has two pages on posts supporting her and validating her decision. That's going to go over great tonight when she brings it to DH, definitely the best way to win marital disagreements.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 15:00     Subject: is DH unreasonable?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:1) Why in the heck did the school think this warranted a phone call? Good grief, it's one day.

2) That said, DH really could have done it, unless he had a crazy day of working from home or needed to be there for a repairman. If he can great, if not well, oh well.

3) You leaving work early and driving over an hour home? That was insane. Totally unnecessary...and on top of it it undermined the decision your DH already made. You should have let it go.

4) Since nearly all these involve not delivering the PJs, apologize to DS when he gets home and do something extra nice like have ice cream after dinner.

Done.


+1 I WFH close to the school and would not have run the PJs over. I'm a DW. You were insane to do what you did. Your child will have many more incidences of being upset about "being the only one". You need to teach your kid how to deal with disappointments, whose ever fault it was.

I probably coddle my kids more than my DH, too, but the incidence you describe was a bit too much.

And totally agree with #1 - whoever had the school call home is ridiculous.


For a kindergartener who was crying over it? That's just mean. I would have.


Is it mean that I teach my DC to deal with disappointments?

So, if your K cries because another kid won a prize and your kid didn't, would you run out and buy your DC a prize? Wow. That's teaching your DC ...oh what's it called... oh I know... the world revolves and caters to what you want.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 14:59     Subject: is DH unreasonable?
OP, you're just another angry wife coming to DCUM to get support against her horrible DH. Handle this face to face with your husband.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 14:59     Subject: Re:is DH unreasonable?
Anonymous wrote:As an aside I'd like to share with you all that I HATE THE SPECIAL DRESS-UP DAYS. It's a nightmare to remember, try to find the right clothes, etc.


I hate them too. I don't need one more thing to have to remember.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 14:58     Subject: is DH unreasonable?
Anonymous wrote:5 yo DC is in K. Everyone was wearing pajamas today but we forgot and sent him to school in regular clothes. School called that Ds is upset because he is not wearing pajamas while everyone else is wearing theirs. DH was at home near the school. I called him and asked to take pajamas to school, he refused saying that this is not important and that the 5 yo needs to toughen up and learn to brush off minor disappointments. I left work and spent an hour driving home, getting pajamas, taking it to school. It has since escalated into a major fight over me spoiling DS, coddling him, etc. DH believes that this was unimportant and DS should have just brushed it off. What do you think?


He is wrong and a moron. Tell him no sex for a month unless he stops being a douchebag.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 14:58     Subject: is DH unreasonable?
Anonymous wrote:The school called pretty early in the day and I did not want them to have to deal with his crying for 5 more hours. Dh was sleeping when I called he goes to work a little later to avoid rush hour traffic. The school is walking distance to the house which means he would either lose 10 minutes of sleep or come to work 10 minutes late. I think being able to participate in a school wide event is a big deal for a 5 year old. And no he is not coddled or spoiled and if anything I am more of a disciplinarian in the family.


If your son was unable to function at school because he was not wearing pajamas, and/or your son's school was unable to cope with your son's feelings about not wearing pajamas -- those are the problems you should be thinking about.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 14:57     Subject: is DH unreasonable?
If your child was so upset that the school called home about this, I'd gently suggest you might want to consider helping your child developing some resilience. Probably neither your husband's approach (telling your child to toughen up) nor yours (coddling and spoiling, at least according to your DH) seems to be working for your family.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 14:57     Subject: is DH unreasonable?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:1) Why in the heck did the school think this warranted a phone call? Good grief, it's one day.

2) That said, DH really could have done it, unless he had a crazy day of working from home or needed to be there for a repairman. If he can great, if not well, oh well.

3) You leaving work early and driving over an hour home? That was insane. Totally unnecessary...and on top of it it undermined the decision your DH already made. You should have let it go.

4) Since nearly all these involve not delivering the PJs, apologize to DS when he gets home and do something extra nice like have ice cream after dinner.

Done.


+1 I WFH close to the school and would not have run the PJs over. I'm a DW. You were insane to do what you did. Your child will have many more incidences of being upset about "being the only one". You need to teach your kid how to deal with disappointments, whose ever fault it was.

I probably coddle my kids more than my DH, too, but the incidence you describe was a bit too much.

And totally agree with #1 - whoever had the school call home is ridiculous.


For a kindergartener who was crying over it? That's just mean. I would have.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 14:56     Subject: is DH unreasonable?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Try to have your child pee on the potty before going to bed. That immediately stopped our peeing through night diapers. That being said, seventh generation overnights seemed to do a good job holding all the pee.


Crap wrong post!


LOL! This was perfect. The conversation was way too serious.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 14:56     Subject: Re:is DH unreasonable?
As an aside I'd like to share with you all that I HATE THE SPECIAL DRESS-UP DAYS. It's a nightmare to remember, try to find the right clothes, etc.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 14:55     Subject: is DH unreasonable?
The school called pretty early in the day and I did not want them to have to deal with his crying for 5 more hours. Dh was sleeping when I called he goes to work a little later to avoid rush hour traffic. The school is walking distance to the house which means he would either lose 10 minutes of sleep or come to work 10 minutes late. I think being able to participate in a school wide event is a big deal for a 5 year old. And no he is not coddled or spoiled and if anything I am more of a disciplinarian in the family.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 14:53     Subject: is DH unreasonable?
Anonymous wrote:1) Why in the heck did the school think this warranted a phone call? Good grief, it's one day.

2) That said, DH really could have done it, unless he had a crazy day of working from home or needed to be there for a repairman. If he can great, if not well, oh well.

3) You leaving work early and driving over an hour home? That was insane. Totally unnecessary...and on top of it it undermined the decision your DH already made. You should have let it go.

4) Since nearly all these involve not delivering the PJs, apologize to DS when he gets home and do something extra nice like have ice cream after dinner.

Done.


+1 I WFH close to the school and would not have run the PJs over. I'm a DW. You were insane to do what you did. Your child will have many more incidences of being upset about "being the only one". You need to teach your kid how to deal with disappointments, whose ever fault it was.

I probably coddle my kids more than my DH, too, but the incidence you describe was a bit too much.

And totally agree with #1 - whoever had the school call home is ridiculous.
Anonymous
Post 10/22/2014 14:51     Subject: Re:is DH unreasonable?
Anonymous wrote:I'm with you. There does come a point where kids need to be responsible for their own things, commitments, etc., but expecting a 5-year-old to be able to read the calendar and know that it means he's supposed to wear pajamas is unreasonable. The parents screwed up, and it's the parents job to fix it if feasible (which it sounds like it was).


Agree.