She thinks of him as her father. Of course he should walk her down the aisle! Don't be so selfish.

OP, I can understand your feelings. I think the posters telling you you are horrid are too strong. You are honest and in touch with your feelings. I'm an only daughter too. But you know in your heart that you need to stand down on this. Please find some way to feel better about this. Be kind, be sharing, be generous and I think you will feel better about the situation. If you can't get to a place of generosity about your dad, I think talking to a therapist for six weeks or so will be helpful.

How old were you when your stepmother and dad got together? Did your step-sister live with your dad growing up? Did you? Did you live with your mom? If so, was your dad involved in your life? Did your dad leave your mother to be with you step-mother? Did your dad behave as more if an attentive family man with his "new" family? Does your step-mother treat you as her child or does she draw lines that prioritize her bio daughter? It seems there's a lot going on here, and that you may feel replaced.

While it is not your place to decide whether your dad walks her down the aisle, a lot of pps are being pretty unsympathetic to your feelings. You are not the one who tore apart your nuclear family, your parents did that. They broke vows and promises, but you've had to live with many of the consequences. Be kind to your step-sister, and to your dad. But try to respect and deal directly with your feelings too. It's hard know without more facts where your insecurity us coming from and where the tensions began, but be sure your father loves you and will help you through this.

Just keep your fingers crossed! Maybe she respects.herself enough to shed this sexist tradition and you really will be the first daughter your father gives away!

OP this isn't something you have any say in.

You need to get over whatever issues you have.

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I expected most of these comments. To answer some of the posters comments, no I'm not single. I've been dating a guy for almost a year now. I'm the younger "sister", but my dads only child. I guess you would have to be in my shoes to understand why I feel this way. It may be selfish and I may need to grow up, but this may be something I may not get over. I guess I will have to make my day extra special if that day ever comes for me.

Go explain to your boyfriend how you're feeling, and I'm sure that day won't be coming anytime soon. You sound horrid.

You yourself admit that he practically raised her. Why would you tell him not to walk her down the aisle?

Don't let jealousy and bitterness ruin your relationships. You don't have to be that woman.

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I expected most of these comments. To answer some of the posters comments, no I'm not single. I've been dating a guy for almost a year now. I'm the younger "sister", but my dads only child. I guess you would have to be in my shoes to understand why I feel this way. It may be selfish and I may need to grow up, but this may be something I may not get over. I guess I will have to make my day extra special if that day ever comes for me.

What, so your dad is going to have to cough up extra money to make amends for this? Are you going to make him pay??? That's,what it sounds like you are implying.

OP, no one is denying you your feelings. But to say "This is something I may never get over" puts you in a selfish and immature light. It's as if you want to wallow in being a victim here.

The fact that you put "daughter" in quotes and mention the woman's mother is your father's common law wife shows that you have issues with this family situation.

Also you say you are your father's only child. I am sorry but while you may be his only biological child you are not his only child. Being considered someone child is not a title reserved only for this who share genes with their parents. I am sure you are aware of familes where the child is not biologically related to one or both parents.

Again, I think this goes back to how you feel about your fathers new family. If this woman considers your father her father I have to feel a bit sad that you two women don't see yourself as sisters.

I have to ask you, if your father were married to his domestic partner and had adopted the daughter would you feel the same?

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I expected most of these comments. To answer some of the posters comments, no I'm not single. I've been dating a guy for almost a year now. I'm the younger "sister", but my dads only child. I guess you would have to be in my shoes to understand why I feel this way. It may be selfish and I may need to grow up, but this may be something I may not get over. I guess I will have to make my day extra special if that day ever comes for me.

I'm going to give what will probably sound like a snide, trollish suggestion, but truly is not meant to be. Please don't get married until you can put this whole issue into the proper perspective, and not feel the need to do things like make your day extra special to somehow make up for the fact that your dad did something wonderful for someone else, or to somehow best your stepsister. You wedding should be about you and your husband, and not about all of this other silliness. If this is getting in the way of your happiness, then you're not ready for marriage.

Anonymous wrote:OP here, I expected most of these comments. To answer some of the posters comments, no I'm not single. I've been dating a guy for almost a year now. I'm the younger "sister", but my dads only child. I guess you would have to be in my shoes to understand why I feel this way. It may be selfish and I may need to grow up, but this may be something I may not get over. I guess I will have to make my day extra special if that day ever comes for me.

It sounds like you are sn asshole. I agree you may never get over that.

Your stepsister likely views your dad as a father figure. People often have people who are their closest ledge male relatives walk them down the aisle if thei fathers aren't around, whether they have died, are estranged, or for any other reason aren't available. So perhaps you could try to see the do Tustin in tthAt light.

I seems the real issue is that you may not feel uniquely treasured and lived by your dad, that he has come to love someone else's child in the same way he lives you. You absluty should not suggest whether he should walk her down the aisle. He us your father, though, and you can work with him on your relationship. I think it's normal and reasonable to feel anxious or upset that you are sharing your parent with someone who isn't a full sibling if yours. Deal with those feelings, which really aren't about the wedding at all. Sometimes parents don't realize thatvtheir bio children can feel replaced by younger stepchildren. Talk with him and he may be able to reassure you how important you are to him.

OP here, I expected most of these comments. To answer some of the posters comments, no I'm not single. I've been dating a guy for almost a year now. I'm the younger "sister", but my dads only child. I guess you would have to be in my shoes to understand why I feel this way. It may be selfish and I may need to grow up, but this may be something I may not get over. I guess I will have to make my day extra special if that day ever comes for me.

OP, what about the other daughter? Have you given any thought to how she'd feel if she had nobody to walk her down the aisle? I can't imagine you'd feel very good about yourself at that wedding, knowing you created such drama and disappointment. Of course, hopefully your father has a backbone and would ignore your request.

Absolutely wrong to ask, and would probably cause long-term if not irreparable damage to relationship(s) that are important to you.