Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 16:55     Subject: Why do you cheat??
I enjoy the high of new romance, getting to know someone new. That whole infatuation phase.
Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 16:51     Subject: Why do you cheat??
Anonymous wrote:I've done my fair share of book reading on affairs post my husband's affair. The general gist is men and women cheat for different reasons. Usually men for sex and to make themselves feel better about themselves as men, women do it for love. For women, it's usually a prelude to divorce, for men, not necessarily. That being said, cheating in the past used to be about sex and a new hot thing. Now, most common affairs are workplace affairs, they develop over time, sometimes with the most seemingly well of intentions. But you spend 8-12 hours a day every day with someone at work, who generally looks their best because they have to dress up for work, and you guys share a lot. I didn't cheat, I never will. And I avoid being friendly with men at work because I don't want to even remotely offer up the chance. I'm hyper vigilant about that, tho.

I'd add, some people do it for the sex. I'm sure. But I think people who one night stand it aren't your homewrecking cheaters. The ones with prolonged romantic affairs, those do it for a variety of reasons.



I've never cheated, but have been very tempted. I love my DH. I have plenty of sex with my DH (much more than most people being very high drive, as is he), but I really would love love to have sex with someone new. I have zero interest in a relationship, I already have that with my DH.

So if I were to cheat, it would be based on sex. Most men annoy me and I'd just want them to shut up and fuck. With my luck I'd probably get some stalker stage 4 clinger type. The only reason I don't cheat is because if my DH found out he would divorce me. If he gave me a pass, you bet I' take it.
Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 16:40     Subject: Why do you cheat??
DW here. I cheat because I find other men attractive. They sometimes hit on me and I can't resist. The thing is I also find DH attractive. Sex is frequent and good at home, but new sex feels too good to pass up at times. I don't want to replace DH, I don't want a new husband. I don't compare him to my affair partners. They are all in separate compartments. For me, the variety is the appeal.
Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 16:01     Subject: Why do you cheat??
Why cheat?

Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 15:57     Subject: Why do you cheat??
I feel others aren't posting because they think it is some kind of trap. Lol. OP here.
I think that in some ways an emotional affair might be worse.
Also to the guy at the rooftop party. I think thats wrong because others are witness to you disrespecting your wife..
Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 15:48     Subject: Why do you cheat??
I've done my fair share of book reading on affairs post my husband's affair. The general gist is men and women cheat for different reasons. Usually men for sex and to make themselves feel better about themselves as men, women do it for love. For women, it's usually a prelude to divorce, for men, not necessarily. That being said, cheating in the past used to be about sex and a new hot thing. Now, most common affairs are workplace affairs, they develop over time, sometimes with the most seemingly well of intentions. But you spend 8-12 hours a day every day with someone at work, who generally looks their best because they have to dress up for work, and you guys share a lot. I didn't cheat, I never will. And I avoid being friendly with men at work because I don't want to even remotely offer up the chance. I'm hyper vigilant about that, tho.

I'd add, some people do it for the sex. I'm sure. But I think people who one night stand it aren't your homewrecking cheaters. The ones with prolonged romantic affairs, those do it for a variety of reasons.
Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 15:30     Subject: Why do you cheat??
Because I love being desired. But it isn't actually cheating, as my dh is fine with it. I would not be fine if the situation was reversed. Judge or question if you wish, but it works for us, and he is very happy with it. In fact, he is happier when I get some on the side than when I don't.
Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 15:17     Subject: Why do you cheat??
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Great answer! And thank you for being honest.
I am in my 40s and sex drive has gone up CONSIDERABLY! I just worry what will happen if your wife finds out..
How do you insure that she won't?


I refuse most opportunities to cheat. I won't mess around with anyone in the office. I won't mess around in town. It is always on the road. I always wear my wedding ring so there are no surprises. If the other woman asks I tell her my wife and I are doing great and I am not looking for a relationship. I generally avoid activities that are high risk for STDs. I stay away from long term affairs.

If I was reckless, wanted to sleep with the office assistant or hot bartender, I could do that but then I am inviting trouble. I don't want to be Jon Edwards or Tiger Woods. Those guys seem like scum, even to me.


Do you wear a condom?


Not for oral. Yes for sex. I assume anyone who would cheat with me would cheat with others. Although I am not the best person to respond, most of my cheating has been kissing, and occasional BJs/Oral. Surprised haven't heard from others. Lot's of people cheat.
Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 15:02     Subject: Why do you cheat??
Is a woman sitting on my lap at a DC rooftop party and me caressing her cheating? If so, then I do it because it's fun, it's happy hour and my wife is nowhere to be found.
Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 14:46     Subject: Why do you cheat??
Anonymous wrote:I seriously want honesty.. I dont want to hear - lack of sex, she/he doesnt understand me. Are you always on the look out or did someone pursue you? Did you see it coming?
I am not judging, just really want to know..


Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 14:37     Subject: Why do you cheat??
Anonymous wrote:What made you think of even entertaining stepping over the line?


Lack of attention. Infrequent, vanilla sex.
Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 14:36     Subject: Why do you cheat??
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Great answer! And thank you for being honest.
I am in my 40s and sex drive has gone up CONSIDERABLY! I just worry what will happen if your wife finds out..
How do you insure that she won't?


I refuse most opportunities to cheat. I won't mess around with anyone in the office. I won't mess around in town. It is always on the road. I always wear my wedding ring so there are no surprises. If the other woman asks I tell her my wife and I are doing great and I am not looking for a relationship. I generally avoid activities that are high risk for STDs. I stay away from long term affairs.

If I was reckless, wanted to sleep with the office assistant or hot bartender, I could do that but then I am inviting trouble. I don't want to be Jon Edwards or Tiger Woods. Those guys seem like scum, even to me.


Do you wear a condom?
Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 14:31     Subject: Why do you cheat??
Anonymous wrote:Great answer! And thank you for being honest.
I am in my 40s and sex drive has gone up CONSIDERABLY! I just worry what will happen if your wife finds out..
How do you insure that she won't?


I refuse most opportunities to cheat. I won't mess around with anyone in the office. I won't mess around in town. It is always on the road. I always wear my wedding ring so there are no surprises. If the other woman asks I tell her my wife and I are doing great and I am not looking for a relationship. I generally avoid activities that are high risk for STDs. I stay away from long term affairs.

If I was reckless, wanted to sleep with the office assistant or hot bartender, I could do that but then I am inviting trouble. I don't want to be Jon Edwards or Tiger Woods. Those guys seem like scum, even to me.
Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 13:24     Subject: Why do you cheat??
I love my DH very much. We have a great relationship for the most part.. We enjoy being w each other. Many of the things you mentioned. I guess if i am being honest- we could/ should have mores sex.
He cheated on me.. Now i dont trust him anymore and i wish i never found out. He still says nothing happened and will never admit truth.
I wish i never found out. I want things to go back to the way they were
Anonymous
Post 08/22/2014 13:16     Subject: Why do you cheat??
Anonymous wrote:



Monkey business!