Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop doing things if she complains about how you do them.

My DH make the mistake of complaining about how I put his laundry away. He did his own laundry for quite some time, until he told me that he did not care how it was done. I also learned not to complain about the way he does dishes.

This, IMHO, is the recipe for a happy marriage.

A-freakin' men. I am married for the 2nd time and I used to get into all of that with my ex wife. She'd been a single mother for a decade and was used to 100% ruling the roost and getting everything exactly her way. We tangled a bunch.

The second my now wife starts to complain about how I'm doing something, I listen just long enough to see if I agree with her complaint, and if I don't, I tell her I'm doing it and I'm going to do it my way; if she insists, I just stop doing it and tell her she can do it her way. I keep my mouth shut when she does things in an acceptable way (to most people) even if it's not how I'd do it or want it done. If I can't tolerate it, I volunteer to take it over, not correct her.

In a couple of cases, where she blew me off and there was a real reason for doing it my way (eg, painting half the wall with flat and half with leftover semi-gloss, same color) and I still kept my trap shut. I didn't have to say I told you so, and that gave her room to say "oh, you were right"...as she re-painted that wall. As time goes by we have fewer and fewer of these kinds of bossy/controlling rounds (both of us have been guilty of it).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I second guess my DH because I know he doesn't like to make an effort and often does a half-ass job.

So, then do it yourself and shut your yap!

She shouldn't have to do everything because he happens to be lazy...

Who says he isn't doing a good job? Maybe she just thinks it is "half assed" while the rest of us may think it was done correct.

When I ask DW to do something, I don't complain about the result. If I"m not happy, the next time I do it myself. I don't work for her...and she doesn't work for me. I don't go around grading the work DW does around the house, with the kids, etc.

If you do...you have some fucking issues to get over.

Sounds to me like the perfect strategy for getting out of having to do anything. Just do a shitty job. She's not allowed to complain, so she has to do it for you. Then go watch TV.

Sure if you married a 12 year old.

Because God knows there's no such thing as a passive aggressive adult, right?

Look, women (and men) shouldn't be controlling micro-managers, but if you really think the dynamic I just described doesn't exist in the adult world, you're delusional.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I second guess my DH because I know he doesn't like to make an effort and often does a half-ass job.

So, then do it yourself and shut your yap!

She shouldn't have to do everything because he happens to be lazy...

Who says he isn't doing a good job? Maybe she just thinks it is "half assed" while the rest of us may think it was done correct.

When I ask DW to do something, I don't complain about the result. If I"m not happy, the next time I do it myself. I don't work for her...and she doesn't work for me. I don't go around grading the work DW does around the house, with the kids, etc.

If you do...you have some fucking issues to get over.

Sounds to me like the perfect strategy for getting out of having to do anything. Just do a shitty job. She's not allowed to complain, so she has to do it for you. Then go watch TV.

Sure if you married a 12 year old.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I second guess my DH because I know he doesn't like to make an effort and often does a half-ass job.

So, then do it yourself and shut your yap!

She shouldn't have to do everything because he happens to be lazy...

Who says he isn't doing a good job? Maybe she just thinks it is "half assed" while the rest of us may think it was done correct.

When I ask DW to do something, I don't complain about the result. If I"m not happy, the next time I do it myself. I don't work for her...and she doesn't work for me. I don't go around grading the work DW does around the house, with the kids, etc.

If you do...you have some fucking issues to get over.

Sounds to me like the perfect strategy for getting out of having to do anything. Just do a shitty job. She's not allowed to complain, so she has to do it for you. Then go watch TV.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I second guess my DH because I know he doesn't like to make an effort and often does a half-ass job.

So, then do it yourself and shut your yap!

She shouldn't have to do everything because he happens to be lazy...

Who says he isn't doing a good job? Maybe she just thinks it is "half assed" while the rest of us may think it was done correct.

When I ask DW to do something, I don't complain about the result. If I"m not happy, the next time I do it myself. I don't work for her...and she doesn't work for me. I don't go around grading the work DW does around the house, with the kids, etc.

If you do...you have some fucking issues to get over.

+1
DW and I agree. If you want it done YOUR way, then DO IT YOURSELF. Some people just need to micromanage. Cannot imagine living like that!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I second guess my DH because I know he doesn't like to make an effort and often does a half-ass job.

So, then do it yourself and shut your yap!

She shouldn't have to do everything because he happens to be lazy...

But if he doesn't think she did a good enough job on the dishes, rather than standing over her shoulder telling her to do them again and to scrub here and she missed a spot there, he should just do them himself. Same with her if she doesn't like how he did something.

Lessons from my father:

1. The enemy of "good enough" is "perfect."

2. The minimum would not be the minimum if it weren't ood enough.

He and my mother were married for 46 years.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I second guess my DH because I know he doesn't like to make an effort and often does a half-ass job.

So, then do it yourself and shut your yap!

She shouldn't have to do everything because he happens to be lazy...

Who says he isn't doing a good job? Maybe she just thinks it is "half assed" while the rest of us may think it was done correct.

When I ask DW to do something, I don't complain about the result. If I"m not happy, the next time I do it myself. I don't work for her...and she doesn't work for me. I don't go around grading the work DW does around the house, with the kids, etc.

If you do...you have some fucking issues to get over.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I second guess my DH because I know he doesn't like to make an effort and often does a half-ass job.

So, then do it yourself and shut your yap!

She shouldn't have to do everything because he happens to be lazy...

Anonymous wrote:I second guess my DH because I know he doesn't like to make an effort and often does a half-ass job.

So, then do it yourself and shut your yap!

Anonymous wrote:I second guess my DH because I know he doesn't like to make an effort and often does a half-ass job.

Yep.

I second guess my DH because I know he doesn't like to make an effort and often does a half-ass job.

Controlling people drive me batty. Can't stand the micromanagers and the do it my way folks. Had a boss like that and having to deal with it for 8 hours a day was brutal. Can't imagine being married to someone like that.

Geez...I would get pissed too!! And I would also retort back that if she wants to have it done her way, then she should go ahead + do it herself!!

Ms. Micromanagement to the Extreme....