Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 23:16     Subject: Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
Whenever DS goes to "no gift" parties, seems like most of the guests have brought a gift.
Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 23:06     Subject: Re:Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
Anonymous wrote:Are people bothered when a party does NOT say no gifts?


Bothered, no. But definitely baffled.

Because of our parenting group, we were invited to a ton of first birthdays - and the guest list for some of these parties was 50+. At the parties for which there hadn't been a "no gifts" note on the invite, the gift table was out of control. Part of me cringes at that. No child needs that many gifts.

We were invited to no less than 15 first birthday parties this past year. About half mentioned "no gifts" on the invitation, and it seemed to me that most gifts took this at face value and didn't bring gifts.

I know it's not couth to mention anything about gifts on an invitation, though.
Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 23:06     Subject: Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
No. We often ask for no gifts and are not at all bothered to bring gifts to other birthday parties. We just can't cram more stuff into our little house, but other people have bigger houses or fewer toys, and THAT'S FINE. We love giving gifts.
Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 22:49     Subject: Re:Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
Are people bothered when a party does NOT say no gifts?
Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 21:02     Subject: Re:Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
Our problem is that DC brings gifts to most parties and would be upset to not receive any. I do realize that I could manage this expectation, but I'm not sure that I should. To be perfectly honest, if a few people brought gifts but most didn't that would be ideal, but of course thats not how these things work. The main reason I would consider saying no gifts is that I don't want parents to feel obligated to bring one.
Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 19:33     Subject: Re:Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
I am from India. Parents did a 'no gifts, cash, flowers. Only your presence, blessings and best wishes requested' for our 'arranged marriage'. We had to spell out the no stuff as that's the typical stuff given. I was thinking of that as we approach DS' first birthday party in a few months. Just thought I'd share.
Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 17:33     Subject: Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
Anonymous wrote:I genuinely don't want gifts. And no matter how you word it people still bring gifts!



I didn't take a gift once to a no gift birthday party and I was the only one! Everyone else had brought a gift. Not doing that again.
Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 16:59     Subject: Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
Anonymous wrote:i have seen people sign up for charity instead and said no gifts please but feel free to support our cause at www.xx.com


I can only imagine the charity available at xx.com
Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 16:48     Subject: Re:Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
Don't bring a gift.
Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 16:25     Subject: Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
I genuinely don't want gifts. And no matter how you word it people still bring gifts!

Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 16:22     Subject: Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here-- to the PP who genuinely doesn't want gifts, could you please put "no gifts please" on the invite instead? I'm happy to respect your preference but I can only do that if I know about it.


NP here: maybe they think the phrasing of "no gifts necessary" is less obnoxious than "no gifts please"


Maybe so, but it's confusing. I the PP's "your presence is your present." Clear, but not phrased as an order. This is OP.


Apparently not clear though. We put this on DD's invite, and still almost evert guest brought a gift.


Yep. This has been my experience every time. And (unfortunately) generally it is a present for DD instead of a six-pack for mommy. I think it's clear, but people just disregard it. I do not understand why.
Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 15:10     Subject: Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We always have a book drive or toy drive in lieu of gifts. That way, the guests don't feel awkward showing up with nothing and we don't have a bunch of gifts we don't want, and a worthy charity gets a donation. Everyone wins![/quote

Lame. I do not want to donate to your charity.


Aren't you a peach.
Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 14:39     Subject: Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP here-- to the PP who genuinely doesn't want gifts, could you please put "no gifts please" on the invite instead? I'm happy to respect your preference but I can only do that if I know about it.


NP here: maybe they think the phrasing of "no gifts necessary" is less obnoxious than "no gifts please"


Maybe so, but it's confusing. I the PP's "your presence is your present." Clear, but not phrased as an order. This is OP.


Apparently not clear though. We put this on DD's invite, and still almost evert guest brought a gift.
Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 14:26     Subject: Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
We always say something like 'no gifts necessary, your presence is gift enough.'

If someone brings a present anyway, that's fine, but that way nobody has to do so, and my DCs have enough stuff already, so the less extra stuff they get the better.
Anonymous
Post 07/24/2014 14:05     Subject: Does "no gifts necessary" mean "please don't bring a gift"?
I read that as, "Really, you don't need to bring our kid anything, but if you feel like bringing something, how about a nice six-pack instead?"

In any case, we have brought booze when the invite says "no gifts necessary."