Anonymous wrote:you are all on the same page and i do agree so i revised my profile to say that i'm actually older than it states and left it at that. i have a recent photo posted as well so they can be the judge if it's about looks. i have a date coming up that i'm really excited about it and he's 9yrs younger (and childless) so may as well come clean now before getting my feelings hurt..

This whole strategy makes you sound stupid and unintelligent, you can't trick someone into dating you.

No

"i have a date coming up that i'm really excited about it and he's 9yrs younger (and childless) so may as well come clean now before getting my feelings hurt.."

Yes, definitely fess up ASAP. Also, he has feelings too. You really seem like you are using these younger guys to boost your ego. I'm sure you would not appreciate being used in the same manner.

I realize that it's difficult to go from having young men chase you all your life to being "invisible," but you're really just better off being honest. If you are as young-looking and fit as you claim, you should be able get a man around your age, instead of having to settle for men in their 60s.

Anonymous wrote:you are all on the same page and i do agree so i revised my profile to say that i'm actually older than it states and left it at that. i have a recent photo posted as well so they can be the judge if it's about looks. i have a date coming up that i'm really excited about it and he's 9yrs younger (and childless) so may as well come clean now before getting my feelings hurt..

Did you revise this after he "found" you or does he think you're really one year younger than him if he didn't check your profile again?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Deal-breaker if someone lied about their age - especially by 10 years! Just a turn-off. And I wouldn't trust them to be truthful in general. It's deceptive - if a man wants a 40 year old then that's what they want. And most 50 year olds can't pass for 40 anyway. It's just not going to work, OP.

+1

+2 dishonesty is the deal breaker, not age.

I don't lie about my age and I post recent photos. So far, that's worked well for me. Most of the guys I date lately have been my age or about 10 years younger. When I see men posting and they are clearly older than the age they list, I ignore them.

you are all on the same page and i do agree so i revised my profile to say that i'm actually older than it states and left it at that. i have a recent photo posted as well so they can be the judge if it's about looks. i have a date coming up that i'm really excited about it and he's 9yrs younger (and childless) so may as well come clean now before getting my feelings hurt..

I understand where you're coming from, OP, but it says a lot about your character if you lie about essential details. Don't do it. You wouldn't like a man to lie to you, so don't lie to him.

I immediately drop a man who lies about something like his age. And I've run into a few of them. If he's going to bend the truth about age, what else is he going to "revise"? That's no way to start a relationship.

Anonymous wrote:Although I am attracted to physically fit women who are even alot older than myself, I could not forgive such a blatant and intentional lie about indisputable fact.
Please don't do it!

Instead, give your actual age and explain the age men you are looking for.
If you are sooooo concerned about the search filter thing, to the degree you would blatantly lie about your age, at LEAST put your actual age in the description and explain your rationale for lying.

ok, that's fair. i will do this.

Although I am attracted to physically fit women who are even alot older than myself, I could not forgive such a blatant and intentional lie about indisputable fact.
Please don't do it!

Instead, give your actual age and explain the age men you are looking for.
If you are sooooo concerned about the search filter thing, to the degree you would blatantly lie about your age, at LEAST put your actual age in the description and explain your rationale for lying.

Anonymous wrote:Deal-breaker if someone lied about their age - especially by 10 years! Just a turn-off. And I wouldn't trust them to be truthful in general. It's deceptive - if a man wants a 40 year old then that's what they want. And most 50 year olds can't pass for 40 anyway. It's just not going to work, OP.

+1

Bad idea.

You cannot compare lying + being deceptive about your age to a potential partner in the same category as seeing a home outside your price range to see what's out there.

By starting out a new possible relationship based on dishonesty, you are wasting not only your time, but someone else's as well. It is unfair and in my opinion, very immature.

On date #3 when you finally let a guy know you are actually TEN yrs. older than you let on, he will wonder what other things you have lied to him about.

Don't be surprised if you find yourself alone again and again.

Don't do it.

I think maybe shaving off one year (to stay in the search ranges as it seems many people set the cutoff at a round number) e.g. saying you are 34 instead of 35, 39 instead of 40, etc. is probably OK. Could just claim you accidentally clicked one above or below on the drop-down menu when you signed up and never noticed. 10 years though - that's a lot. That's an entire decade of life and experience you're denying you lived.

If you look that much younger, why not just meet men in person where those who are attracted to you will approach you based on how old you look, not how old you actually are?

Pp again- 10 years is too much lying. 4-5 yes is ok

I'm 39 and I say I'm 35 because most men won't look above 35 on profiles. They lie about their height so it's fair.