Anonymous wrote:I'm curious about why a woman who is 40+ and professionally established would so prefer a never-married over a divorced man that she would bother to discount the divorced guy?

OP again. They are open to divorced men. But other than online, they can't seem to meet them in real life. This seems to be a common situation in my circles so I thought I'd ask. In their twenties and early thirties they were focused on careers but I think they thought they would meet someone along the way. Yet suddenly they're 37, 41, 43 and no more prospects than five years ago. I'm sure some of them would move out west if they met the right guy but now they have careers on the east coast so starting anew in Seattle or Denver with only the hopes that the odds are better doesn't seem like the best idea.

I'm curious about why a woman who is 40+ and professionally established would so prefer a never-married over a divorced man that she would bother to discount the divorced guy?

I know a few - a couple of divorced dads from school, a couple of my neighbors, a couple of guys at work. Don't know how a single woman would meet men like them. The dads you'd probably have a hard time meeting them outside school functions/kid-oriented stuff. The never-marrieds are kind of set in their bachelor ways by the time they hit their late 30s/early 40s and hang out in the golf course, sports events, sports bars. Guess that's where your single friends would have to go to run into them.

DC is rated one of the worst places for single women to find a guy to get married. Everyone comes here so bent on career success and look down on people who get married in their early 20's. Unfortunately pickings get slim for women the older they get. Plus the pressure to have children by a certain age. More women are ending up not married and without children.

Maybe it's a lawyer/highly educated thing. I know at least 5 women in that age range who focused on their careers and are wishing they had children instead.

I get hit on all the time by single men. Where are you trying to find one? I bike, run, hike, row, the Seersucker Social, etc. If you are looking in church or at a restaurant, they aren't there.

In ... China? ::ducks::

Don't bother looking for the never marrieds. Go for the divorced guy, especially the nice divorced dad who has 50/50 custody and is friendly with his remarried ex-wife.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There aren't many of them. My single friends and I have tried all of the dating websites and the few men who are okay with a woman who is too old for kids just seem odd. I have a kid so I a stuck between being too old to have another kid and has one of her own. The only men who seem interested are men who already have their own kids. They don't seem to understand that I have mine 24/7.

odd in what way? just curious

not in the right tax bracket odd

ah ok - why didn't you just say that then (i.e. just put in your profile, 'no poors')?

I wrote about these men being odd but I didn't write "not in the right tax bracket odd." The odd ones didn't seem to be able to hold a conversation. I am usually the quieter person when first meeting someone but if I am holding up both ends of the conversation, something is amiss.

fair enough. sorry for assuming you were PP who said he tax bracket thing

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There aren't many of them. My single friends and I have tried all of the dating websites and the few men who are okay with a woman who is too old for kids just seem odd. I have a kid so I a stuck between being too old to have another kid and has one of her own. The only men who seem interested are men who already have their own kids. They don't seem to understand that I have mine 24/7.

odd in what way? just curious

not in the right tax bracket odd

ah ok - why didn't you just say that then (i.e. just put in your profile, 'no poors')?

I wrote about these men being odd but I didn't write "not in the right tax bracket odd." The odd ones didn't seem to be able to hold a conversation. I am usually the quieter person when first meeting someone but if I am holding up both ends of the conversation, something is amiss.

India

OP,

What were your friends doing from 25-35?

OP again. I should also add that only one of the single women I know have unrealistic expectations for income. The rest would be happy to meet a normal, nice guy who has a job he enjoys, whatever it is.

OP here. I think some if not all are open to men of different backgrounds (races,religions, etc) but what continues to strike me is that I just don't seem to know any single heterosexual men. Neither does DH. Or my male or female friends in NYC, DC, or Miami. Statistically they have to exist. Where are they? I'm going to Google the Ted Talk now.

Perhaps move to israel to find a israeli guy?