Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It means he wants to have sex with you and is infatuated with you.

If he wants to say "I love you," he'll say "I love you."

This.

"I've fallen for you" sounds both pseudo-Victorian and vaguely resentful. "You're nothing but a common shopgirl from Spitfields, Emily, but I've fallen for you. I'll put you up in a 33k pounds a year flat so I can have my way with you in between siring legitimate children and serving as an expert witness in this new field of medicine started by this Germanic chap Freud."

Well done. I'm surprised you have gotten more kudos on this work.

Yes, thanks for the laugh!

Anonymous wrote:My BF said that in an email yesterday (he is out of the country until Sunday), but I'm not sure what it means...is it a precursor to "I love you" or....a safe way of saying "I love you"... or??

I think he is the love of my life and don't want to screw it up, so I need to know how to interpret...thanks!

I say you nailed it right there.

He may not want to say it yet, he may feel it is too early and not want to jump the gun, but he wants you to know that things are definitely headed in that direction...Meaning the direction of L-O-V-E.

Lucky Girl you are OP!!

I think he loves you; he realizes it especially because he's away, and since he's over 40 he knows enough to realize that email or texting "I love you" for the first time is not the memory he wants to create; he wants it to be as it should be, in person, and to see your reaction.

But he can't keep his mouth shut so he's both tipping his hand and getting a little of his nerve up with "I've fallen for you" which is more acceptable to say for the first time via email or text.

That being said, most of the other interpretations also make sense. And I agree with the PP who says that behavior trumps words.

Promise us when you find out, come back here and let us know.

Don't pay attention to anything he says. Watch what he does. Words are meaningless.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It means he wants to have sex with you and is infatuated with you.

If he wants to say "I love you," he'll say "I love you."

This.

"I've fallen for you" sounds both pseudo-Victorian and vaguely resentful. "You're nothing but a common shopgirl from Spitfields, Emily, but I've fallen for you. I'll put you up in a 33k pounds a year flat so I can have my way with you in between siring legitimate children and serving as an expert witness in this new field of medicine started by this Germanic chap Freud."

Well done. I'm surprised you have gotten more kudos on this work.

Anonymous wrote:It means he wants to have sex with you and is infatuated with you.

If he wants to say "I love you," he'll say "I love you."

+1000

For me, "I love you" is a MUCH bigger deal than having sex. In fact, DH was the first and only person I've ever said it to. To me, saying "I love you" is a precursor to "Let's get married", not a precursor to having sex. I don't say the L word until I know that this is the person that I want to spend the rest of my life with. So for me, "I'm falling for you" would be a way of expressing that I really have strong feelings, but am not quite ready to make a permanent commitment.

i'm over 40. was dating someone last year for several months. he said he was falling for me...i was definitely falling for him. i know i was infatuated with him and he with me. once it settled down a little (after 4 or 5 months, i was ready to really be in it...and then he broke up with me.

give it a little time. not suggesting he is not the one for you but try to pace yourself a little. you need to know people for a little bit...

enjoy it though.

He is the only one who knows what it means. So don't think about it at all.

If you are ready to say I love you, do and that will let you know where things stand.

Waiting and seeing how things go and what else he says is good too. If he is "the one" you can't mess this up.

Anonymous wrote:This must be same poster with similar love questions that were only dating for 2 mos.

Dating at this point (post divorce, 40s) can be confusing. You're too old and vulnerable for bed-hopping. Too young to give the "Let's not waste each other's time." speech.

My ex-DH is dating someone new. He is more into her than she is into him (his words, not mine) and he's the type to fall hard fast. It's hard watching him struggle, especially since he is rushing to introduce kids.

To me, adore is so much stronger than love.