I'd literally tell her to worry about her own space and work.

"Mary, I don't report to you. How I keep my workspace is not your concern nor your place to comment on. I need you to stop interrupting me and focus on your own work rather than mine. Go fuck yourself"

Last sentence optional.

Anonymous wrote:Isn't "exposure therapy" a treatment for OCD? Allowing your coworker to constantly clean, rather than having to be exposed to a mess, may be making her condition worse in the long run.

My cousin has OCD. When we were little and I slept at her place, she used to make me wake up two hours earlier than necessary, at five or so, because she absolutely had to make her bed first thing in the morning, and it took her two hours to do her morning routine. So I just slept on the floor. She just really needs her own separate space, for her sake and those around her. She has her own office which is pretty essential.

If this coworker can't have an office, the coworker at least needs to have a desk that is hers and hers alone. Beyond that, she should not be controlling other people's spaces.

As to the quoted previous testers' comments, my cousin generally lives alone unless she is dating someone who is over a lot. I would not even want to spend one night in her house because it would stress her out too much. But I do remember one time she was dating someone she felt was too accommodating of her OCD. He would kind of walk on eggshells around her trying to placate and allow her to do her excessive cleaning etc. she felt this was actually worse for her. It's a fine line. You need to be sensitive to the fact that this is a mental health issue that is nearly impossible to cure, while not making it worse by going along with it too much.

Don't understand the office setup that the original poster has described. But it sounds like that the OCD woman has to share space. That's not a good idea. At the very least, she needs her separate desk. She can be controlling on her desk. But she needs to be told to leave other peoples desks alone

Anonymous wrote:Not being mean, but by the time a person is an adult, they should be able to manage their issues, and that includes OCD. Just because you have OCD, ADHD or any other issue doesn't mean you are just allowed to go running around doing whatever the hell you want. You still have to be able to function in society. Medicated or not, this person needs to figure out what is and isn't ok to do in a workplace, and needs to learn that some things need to happen inside of her own head instead of out in public.

I have a friend who blames a lot of stuff on her adult ADHD, including missing deadlines for things like car inspections. One of our friends dared to suggest putting it on the calendar with reminders to get it done by a certain day, and got reamed for being insensitive and clueless. But in my view, if you haven't figured out how to manage your life by your early 40's, you have bigger problems than ADHD.

Please keep in mind that many people are not diagnosed, were misdiagnosed, or were untreated or mistreated for their issues as kids. I was in my mid 30s when I got diagnosed with aspergers and I've not been treated for it. So I just stumble through life, royally screwing up on the regular and doing the best I can.

Isn't "exposure therapy" a treatment for OCD? Allowing your coworker to constantly clean, rather than having to be exposed to a mess, may be making her condition worse in the long run.

This woman needs her own separate office space or at least a separate desk as accommodation for her OCD.

Anonymous wrote:"Tidying up is busy work that one does to avoid real work. If you don't have any real work to do, you need to let your Supervisor know or I will."

Oh, I love this! I don't want to be mean, but she isn't leaving me many options.

"Tidying up is busy work that one does to avoid real work. If you don't have any real work to do, you need to let your Supervisor know or I will."

Anonymous wrote:As a person with OCD (diagnosed and medicated for 21 years) I find it odd that she is trying to manipulate others' behavior. This is not typical. Most OCD behavior is focused inward. I would not tiptoe around this. It needs to be addressed from a "you cannot control other people's behavior/workspace" stand point just as if she did not have OCD.

Initially, she just cleaned everything herself, but then she threw away things that we both needed. After I told her she has to check with me before cleaning my areas, she started asking me 6-7 times per shift to please tidy up myself or let her know what can be discarded or filed. Part of the problem is the shared workspaces have ill-defined ownership. She uses the drawers of the file cabinets, but the top is where I need to put oversize items.

I will try the dedicated time for cleaning and nit-picky revising. However, she still can't file all of our materials during that time because it wrecks my work flow. I have told her that verbal requests from her to tidy or even physically getting up to unfile whatever she just put away are interruptions that make me work slower.

I admit that I let her explanation of OCD cow me a bit. I wanted her to be happy sharing the space with someone who works part-time. I job share and am in 8 hours a week. The woman who works 32 hours a week doesn't share our work space.

I work on 4-5 projects at a time and they are in various stages of doneness so my desk and 2 or 3 work stations may have assorted pieces on them. However, I know where everything is because of the flow of the work (Location A is new and barely started, location B is halfway done, location C is almost finished, and location D is done and waiting to go to the client). I inherited this system from the person who had the position before. I shared the space with 2 previous coworkers who never complained so I asked our supervisor was there a mess vs. a reasonable use of the space given what I do. He confirmed my position.

I have actually considered quitting because I am not dependent on this work. I use the paychecks to pay for extras for my kids. However, I don't want to be run out by a 25 year old who is a pest.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When she is not around - mess up her desk. She'll be so freaked out trying to get her s*** together she won't have time to mess with yours.

Lol. You make her seem like those dogs who were bred to do a job and go nuts if they can't do their job or there is no job to do.

The two of you are obviously really empathetic people. I doubt the co-worker really enjoys having OCD.

OP, I second the suggestion to try to sit down with her and talk about it at a time when she is not trying to tidy up.

I am one of those posters. I don't think she likes having OCD and I doubt that OP enjoys having her work interrupted by her co-worker's inability to handle her issues whatever they may be.

thanks,

As a person with OCD (diagnosed and medicated for 21 years) I find it odd that she is trying to manipulate others' behavior. This is not typical. Most OCD behavior is focused inward. I would not tiptoe around this. It needs to be addressed from a "you cannot control other people's behavior/workspace" stand point just as if she did not have OCD.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not being mean, but by the time a person is an adult, they should be able to manage their issues, and that includes OCD. Just because you have OCD, ADHD or any other issue doesn't mean you are just allowed to go running around doing whatever the hell you want. You still have to be able to function in society. Medicated or not, this person needs to figure out what is and isn't ok to do in a workplace, and needs to learn that some things need to happen inside of her own head instead of out in public.

I have a friend who blames a lot of stuff on her adult ADHD, including missing deadlines for things like car inspections. One of our friends dared to suggest putting it on the calendar with reminders to get it done by a certain day, and got reamed for being insensitive and clueless. But in my view, if you haven't figured out how to manage your life by your early 40's, you have bigger problems than ADHD.

Agree. But there are a lot of people in the workforce who don't manage their issues. What can you do? Report them to HR?

Not cave in to ridiculous demands. Don't stop and clean your area if she asks and don't let her do it. Be firm and polite. Tell her "no, my work area is tidy enough, let's get back to work", over and over and over. If you never give she will stop asking or will be so upset she will quit.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not being mean, but by the time a person is an adult, they should be able to manage their issues, and that includes OCD. Just because you have OCD, ADHD or any other issue doesn't mean you are just allowed to go running around doing whatever the hell you want. You still have to be able to function in society. Medicated or not, this person needs to figure out what is and isn't ok to do in a workplace, and needs to learn that some things need to happen inside of her own head instead of out in public.

I have a friend who blames a lot of stuff on her adult ADHD, including missing deadlines for things like car inspections. One of our friends dared to suggest putting it on the calendar with reminders to get it done by a certain day, and got reamed for being insensitive and clueless. But in my view, if you haven't figured out how to manage your life by your early 40's, you have bigger problems than ADHD.

Agree. But there are a lot of people in the workforce who don't manage their issues. What can you do? Report them to HR?

Yup. If the boss isn't handling the situation, I would seek guidance from HR. Otherwise the OP is enabling the OCD behavior and also allowing her own productivity to be constantly disrupted.

Anonymous wrote:Not being mean, but by the time a person is an adult, they should be able to manage their issues, and that includes OCD. Just because you have OCD, ADHD or any other issue doesn't mean you are just allowed to go running around doing whatever the hell you want. You still have to be able to function in society. Medicated or not, this person needs to figure out what is and isn't ok to do in a workplace, and needs to learn that some things need to happen inside of her own head instead of out in public.

I have a friend who blames a lot of stuff on her adult ADHD, including missing deadlines for things like car inspections. One of our friends dared to suggest putting it on the calendar with reminders to get it done by a certain day, and got reamed for being insensitive and clueless. But in my view, if you haven't figured out how to manage your life by your early 40's, you have bigger problems than ADHD.

Agree. But there are a lot of people in the workforce who don't manage their issues. What can you do? Report them to HR?

Sounds like she needs personal space at work. It sounds like you don't have individual offices, correct? Do you think she could get one? If not, is there a cubicle she could move to where she doesn't see as much of other people's "mess"? Maybe one faces a wall or looks directly out onto a window?