Anonymous wrote:The late 1940's-mid 1970's were an anomaly in American life as the US was enjoying the postwar economic boom. The Ward Cleaver/Donna Reed lifestyle was celebrated with the wife at home while the husband worked and a station wagon was in the driveway. People got married right out of college and life expectancy was in the low 70s. Flash forward over forty years and the world between men and women is completely different. Here are factors that support why divorce and/or infidelity are almost unavoidable for college educated couples:
1) people get married much later and have more complicated emotional and sexual histories.
- If the average college educated person has 2-4 serious relationships before they meet their spouse, there are 2-4 situations that did not work out. Hence, a 100% failure rate. Why should the marriage work out any differently?
- having more sex with more people leads to a continued curiosity that is not easily satisfied with one person.
2) women are in the workforce.
- there are many more opportunities for men and women to find partners for cheating vs. the 1950s where the milkman or postal carrier was generally the only one available for this
- the fact that women earn money provides them with the resources to leave a marriage if they are not happy
- married women achieving professional success can begin to believe that they "deserve" sex as part of the reward for their hard work (men also, I suppose)
- women in the office are exposed to alpha males. There is an undeniable appeal that these men have to them combined with the fact that they see co-workers more than their own spouses
3) modern communications.
- smartphones, FB, internet sites (e.g. Ashley Madison), etc. all give someone who wants to cheat plenty of places to find someone. There was no equivalent in earlier times.
4) the sexualization of American culture.
- no matter where you look, TV, movies, internet porn, etc. the ability to look at other human beings in a purely sexual manner have never been greater. This has increased American's expectations for sex - frequency, quality, need to experiment, etc. IF it cannot be found at home. women in the workforce creates a never-ending stream of affair partners
5) no-fault divorce
- divorce can often be easier than filing your income taxes. Something easy is easily abused.
6) people are living much longer
- be honest, can you really imagine in your 30s having sex with only one person for the next 50 years? Knowing their entire routine and still being excited?
Lot of generalizations but ok.
I would add that many also model themselves on their own divorced or cheating parents.