I am in the same boat - currently pregnant with #2 and DD will be 6 when DS is born. We'd have loved to have them closer in age, TBH, but there was an economic reason why we couldn't start trying again right away and by the time that reason went away, it took us some time to conceive. I am sure it will be OK, OP! I come from a family of large age differences between siblings yet everyone is pretty close to each other.

Plus, it is what it is - you can't change it.

This happened to us too. It took us 2.5 years to conceive number 2. I had completely given up hope. They are 6.5 years apart and the youngest is 5 months old. Just like everyone else has said, the baby lights up when he sees his sibling and my oldest is so sweet and caring of his little bro. Please don't worry about it. I hope it works out for you!

We are currently pregnant with #2. Our first will be 8.5 and starting 3rd grade when this baby is born. For various reasons, we had waited until our first was 4 before ttc again. Then, one year in, we got ourselves diagnosed unexplained secondary infertile when our first was started kindergarten. We weren't ready to spend the money at that point...that decision took another year and a half, and of course the clinic wanted us retested at that point. So, 3 years into ttc #2, we finally did our first iui. Got pregnant on try #2, then miscarried a month later. Third attempt a couple months later failed, then we took some time off for personal reasons and the holidays. We were about to go back to give it one last shot...and my period never showed in January. I somehow after 3.5 years of no luck had gotten pregnant on my own.

We obviously weren't set on a particular age gap. We didn't necessarily plan THIS big of a gap, but we're thrilled to finally be adding to our family. Our first is so excited to be a big sister.

I guess on the plus side, we did have a little time on our side since we had our first in our 20s. I think it would have been more pressing if we'd waited until later on. This isn't a slight-I realize some people don't meet the one until later and other circumstances. I was very lucky, I get it.

Anyway, we just figure this was how it was supposed to happen all along. We're feeling pretty lucky that this is happening, no matter being a bit unconventional.

We also wanted a 2 year age gap. #1 was conceived naturally with a full year of charting - we actually had our appt scheduled with an RE for bloodwork when we found out we were pregnant. #2 took 3 IUIs and 3 IVFs before we were successful. They are 'only' 4 years apart. Honestly, I ended up really liking having all the alone time with the older one, it was so easy to do outings and just pick up and go, while watching friends struggle to get 2 or 3 kids out of the house. #1 is about to go off to K and #2 will be like an only all day. The house will be noticeably quieter, but I'm looking forward to the ease of only transporting 1 around.
This thread is super of interest to me because we still have a frozen embryo left and by the time we are ready to transfer - if successful, there will be a 6-7 year gap between #1 and #3... which seems like a lot. I'm trying not to worry about it, but I am not at all close with my brother who is 10 years younger. I was always his babysitter and ended up more in a 'mom' role than a sister role and it did not go well.

Anonymous wrote:I have a 5yr age gap. My now 13 month old ivf baby's first words are his sister name. They are honestly bffs. She thinks she's his mom. Their bond has been incredible. I used to worry but honestly she had the maturity and independence to make this a very positive experience.
By the way he only smiles first thing in the morning after seeing his sister face. He plays barbies with her, loves her jewely and she and her friends can't get enough. She's never resentful or mad at him.


My friend has an 8yr gap. The kids are rock solid. She too tells me her baby lights up for his sister in a way that he doesn't even do for her,

I think this bond can only continue. My mom has four siblings and she's closest to her opposite sex sibling of ten yrs older. I don't think age matters,

so cute.

I have a 5yr age gap. My now 13 month old ivf baby's first words are his sister name. They are honestly bffs. She thinks she's his mom. Their bond has been incredible. I used to worry but honestly she had the maturity and independence to make this a very positive experience.
By the way he only smiles first thing in the morning after seeing his sister face. He plays barbies with her, loves her jewely and she and her friends can't get enough. She's never resentful or mad at him.


My friend has an 8yr gap. The kids are rock solid. She too tells me her baby lights up for his sister in a way that he doesn't even do for her,

I think this bond can only continue. My mom has four siblings and she's closest to her opposite sex sibling of ten yrs older. I don't think age matters,

My brother and I are really good friends and are five and a half years apart. My parents planned it that way to avoid two in college at the same time!

Anonymous wrote:I'm in the same boat but at this point i will be thrilled with any age gap. Good luck to us all

This is what we thought too. Whatever age difference will be what we end up with. And it'll be fine for them either way. I know adults that are close to their 6 year apart siblings, and adults that hate their 2 year apart siblings. But we knew we wanted 2 children, so we were happy with whatever we ended up with. FWIW, we were successful, and the age gap is a non-issue. There is a lot of love in our house!