I wonder what Stanford's vibe is like? Less stressed since it's on the west coast?

Anonymous wrote:I think the Fiske Guide to Colleges give a good sense of the competitive atmosphere at different colleges, so I would recommend giving that a close read.

This is a gross generalization, but kids at east coast schools tend to be more overtly competitive than those at schools in the south and midwest. For example, some rigorous schools that are considered more friendly/non-competitive are Carleton, Kenyon, Macalester, Rice. Also, women's colleges (Wellesley, Bryn Mawr) are often much more cooperative than cutthroat.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I teach in a college. Basically the high achievers tell me high school stress was nothing compared to college stress. Half of them take Adderall to stay awake, Xanax to keep form panicking and drink alcohol to 'relax'.

They are just as perfectionistic in high school but with even higher stakes - the job market looming. they are trying to do as much service and extra curriculars as they can while also working and playing a sport.

As often the high achievers are in programs where you basically had to be a high achiever to even get accepted to the program, the competitiveness is fierce.

It is also the age when mental illness and mental health problems explode and depression is rampant in this age group - partly due to poor self care that wears them down (no sleep, poor nutrition, too much drinking). Then they start to feel suicidal or like quitting but they can't because there is too much internal pressure and sense of external reputation to hold up. Anxiety is rampant especially around exams and project times.

Agree with the above. I've been surprised at the number of students I have each year who are very smart, very well-prepared, and have serious stress related issues that really impede academic success. Since you know that your daughter is predisposed to stress, I would really encourage you to find her some formal stress management program/therapy before she goes to school.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A weirdly high number of kids have committed suicide at William & Mary, supposedly because of the stress.

http://www.wydailyarchives.com/local-news/5232-surge-in-deaths-leaves-william-and-mary-battling-suicide-school-reputation.html

I would be interested in knowing where the most recent three suicides hail from.

Whitney Mayer was from Plano, Texas.

Ian Smith-Christmas was from Stafford, Virginia.

Dominique Chandler was from Portsmouth, Virginia.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A weirdly high number of kids have committed suicide at William & Mary, supposedly because of the stress.

http://www.wydailyarchives.com/local-news/5232-surge-in-deaths-leaves-william-and-mary-battling-suicide-school-reputation.html

I would be interested in knowing where the most recent three suicides hail from.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I teach in a college. Basically the high achievers tell me high school stress was nothing compared to college stress. Half of them take Adderall to stay awake, Xanax to keep form panicking and drink alcohol to 'relax'.

They are just as perfectionistic in high school but with even higher stakes - the job market looming. they are trying to do as much service and extra curriculars as they can while also working and playing a sport.

As often the high achievers are in programs where you basically had to be a high achiever to even get accepted to the program, the competitiveness is fierce.

It is also the age when mental illness and mental health problems explode and depression is rampant in this age group - partly due to poor self care that wears them down (no sleep, poor nutrition, too much drinking). Then they start to feel suicidal or like quitting but they can't because there is too much internal pressure and sense of external reputation to hold up. Anxiety is rampant especially around exams and project times.

Agree with the above. I've been surprised at the number of students I have each year who are very smart, very well-prepared, and have serious stress related issues that really impede academic success. Since you know that your daughter is predisposed to stress, I would really encourage you to find her some formal stress management program/therapy before she goes to school.

Anonymous wrote:A weirdly high number of kids have committed suicide at William & Mary, supposedly because of the stress.

http://www.wydailyarchives.com/local-news/5232-surge-in-deaths-leaves-william-and-mary-battling-suicide-school-reputation.html

Anonymous wrote:Looking for some advice here . . . DD is a junior at a local magnet high school and has done very well academically (A's and A minus's, 2300+ SAT, etc). However, she has not been able to enjoy high school because she is a perfectionist and gets very stressed by the workload and the fact that she is around many kids who are willing to work, work, work to the exclusion of all else (since she feels compelled to keep up with them). I am hoping that she will have a more balanced life when she gets to college, but it is very hard to tell from the outside which of the top-tier colleges have a lot of stressed kids/unreasonable workloads and which might allow for more balance. (I'm not saying she has to go to an Ivy-level college, but she would want it to be somewhat academically rigorous.) Does anyone have any personal experience to share in terms of which schools are known to be full of stressed kids, or which are known to promote balance? Thanks.

Anonymous wrote:She's going to be stressed and high achieving no matter where she goes. She should just aim for the top. Don't encourage her to go to a less prestigious school under the misguided notion it will make her less stressed. At this point, her drive is internalized. Might as well get the ivy on her resume.