Anonymous
Post 03/12/2014 15:47     Subject: Dh's parents
Anonymous wrote:My in-laws came to 'help', but what they mean is they want to play with the baby when they feel like it and I have to do everything else. Not sure if my in-laws have ever changed a diaper of my two kids. Know for a fact they have never done the dishes. My mom, on the other hand, truly 'helped' because she actually cares about my health and well being, and not just here to see the baby. I wouldn't sound so bitter about my in-laws if they didn't throw a fit when they found we hired help.


PP, they can MYOB. Some ILs are only good for complaining and criticizing, never so much as a helpful word. I'm thinking their life always sucked!
Anonymous
Post 03/12/2014 15:43     Subject: Dh's parents
We get the same from one of our sets of parents. Endless talk about how they can't wait to help, all the help they will be when they come, talk about how they were so happy to help us out when they leave. Only no actual helping happens, just extra guests for us to prepare food for, entertain, and wait on.

Some people lie, whether intentional or not. Unfortunately you have to find it out the hard way, no one tells you up front they are full of $hit.
Anonymous
Post 03/11/2014 08:45     Subject: Dh's parents
Anonymous wrote:You are lucky they came at all. You don't exactly sound like a peach of a DIL.


NP

I wouldn't say she's lucky. She has a new baby and houseguests who need tending and who aren't being helpful.

They're an extra burden, not a help.
Anonymous
Post 03/11/2014 08:43     Subject: Dh's parents
Lesson learned. They're not the helping type. My ILs visited when dd was 2 weeks old and asked me to get her some coffee while I washed dishes. My mom hears the baby wake up and knocks on my door to say "let me know when you're done nursing her so I can bring her downstairs while you go back to sleep". Now we know who gets the next invite to visit, and who may me asked to stay in a hotel.
Anonymous
Post 03/11/2014 01:06     Subject: Dh's parents
My in-laws came to 'help', but what they mean is they want to play with the baby when they feel like it and I have to do everything else. Not sure if my in-laws have ever changed a diaper of my two kids. Know for a fact they have never done the dishes. My mom, on the other hand, truly 'helped' because she actually cares about my health and well being, and not just here to see the baby. I wouldn't sound so bitter about my in-laws if they didn't throw a fit when they found we hired help.
Anonymous
Post 03/09/2014 18:41     Subject: Re:Dh's parents
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I feel for you OP- been there. When DD was born, DH's parents came to town when she was two weeks old to "help". We were in a small apartment so they were at a near-by hotel. I had a 2 year-old and a colicky newborn and a DH who was working 80 hours a week at a new job. They agreed to be at the apartment by 7am so I could get some sleep. 8 am, 9 am, 10 am- NOTHING!! I called DH at work and he finally calls the hotel. They actually put a "block all calls" order on their line. I wanted to kill them. So did DH.


I don't understand new mothers who expect more from their in laws than they do their husbands.


What's wrong with trusting and expecting people to follow through on what they verbally said they would do?
I guess true colors show themselves quite quickly with some. Now you know who you can and cannot count on.


I agree completely. Don't rely on the ILs. Isn't that universally understood? Seriously. MILs around the world are known for looking for "digs" where there are none. Who has that kind of time?

Weddings, funerals, births, all of these life occasions are opportunity for peoples true colors. When they show you, believe them.

Anonymous
Post 03/08/2014 22:07     Subject: Re:Dh's parents
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I feel for you OP- been there. When DD was born, DH's parents came to town when she was two weeks old to "help". We were in a small apartment so they were at a near-by hotel. I had a 2 year-old and a colicky newborn and a DH who was working 80 hours a week at a new job. They agreed to be at the apartment by 7am so I could get some sleep. 8 am, 9 am, 10 am- NOTHING!! I called DH at work and he finally calls the hotel. They actually put a "block all calls" order on their line. I wanted to kill them. So did DH.


I don't understand new mothers who expect more from their in laws than they do their husbands.


What's wrong with trusting and expecting people to follow through on what they verbally said they would do?
I guess true colors show themselves quite quickly with some. Now you know who you can and cannot count on.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2014 22:04     Subject: Dh's parents
Anonymous wrote:OP. It's not a newborn, it's a toddler. They said they wanted to watch him in the morning while we slept in. It doesn't matter, I'm always super duper nice to them, this is just somewhere for me to vent.


Sounds like their word is worthless. Sigh.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2014 22:03     Subject: Re:Dh's parents
Anonymous wrote:I feel for you OP- been there. When DD was born, DH's parents came to town when she was two weeks old to "help". We were in a small apartment so they were at a near-by hotel. I had a 2 year-old and a colicky newborn and a DH who was working 80 hours a week at a new job. They agreed to be at the apartment by 7am so I could get some sleep. 8 am, 9 am, 10 am- NOTHING!! I called DH at work and he finally calls the hotel. They actually put a "block all calls" order on their line. I wanted to kill them. So did DH.


I don't understand new mothers who expect more from their in laws than they do their husbands.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2014 20:56     Subject: Re:Dh's parents
I feel for you OP- been there. When DD was born, DH's parents came to town when she was two weeks old to "help". We were in a small apartment so they were at a near-by hotel. I had a 2 year-old and a colicky newborn and a DH who was working 80 hours a week at a new job. They agreed to be at the apartment by 7am so I could get some sleep. 8 am, 9 am, 10 am- NOTHING!! I called DH at work and he finally calls the hotel. They actually put a "block all calls" order on their line. I wanted to kill them. So did DH.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2014 20:43     Subject: Dh's parents
You are lucky to have them. My IL's never offered help, not even read a single story to DC.
Anonymous
Post 03/08/2014 20:41     Subject: Dh's parents
I'd send him into their room and go back to bed.