Is this the same OP bitter DH who moved his family overseas and all around and now is mad his DW can't get/won't pop easily back into a professional job?

What is the reason DW can't take DS to school? I have a feeling that there is another version to this story.

And yes, my job regularly requres travel, long hours, etc. but I coach the Little League, am home on weekends, am home in the evening to check homework, etc.

She needs time to look for a job, shop for nice clothes, get her hair done, go to the gym, etc. etc. etc.

Anonymous wrote:You sound like an ass. Ok. So you are far more important than your wife. We get it. Go tell a judge. You get huge child support and alimony and every other weekend visits. You said you are too busy to take your kid to school. So, how would parenting without her be?

Now, if I were you, I would say you are sorry and do something nice for her given all the hours you are working.

Ahh a prime example of the victim/martyr species. Can only see your own perspective and no other. Black and white concrete thinker.

Op- Sorry this is all happening. I am not sure if this is just a vent or indicative of a much bigger issue. If she she sounds borderline abusive.

Why did she need me? Because she decided she does too much already! That she is not everyyone's taxi driver.

Anonymous wrote:Why did she need you to take DD to school?

Because there is no school bus and no direct metrobus route to the school. It is a 10 minute drive vs. a 40 minute bus ride with the change of buses. DD will start driving next year.

She's provoking you to get your attention, and it seems to be working - maybe nothing else does? You guys are in a very bad dynamic.

How do you help a teen deal with a "crazy-making" Mom. I can handle this. I emotionally disengage. I don't respond and I don't allow myself to get sucked into the vortex. DD does not have the maturity or the skills to do this.

I was proud that she put that boundary about where Mom should be placing her anger. It may not be respected, but goddamn it she took a stand! I just hope she has a better day than she did a morning!

OP - you put too much identifying info. Ask Jeff to remove some of it.

Anonymous wrote:You need to stop engaging with her. She's "crazy making."

That said, you need to re-think how much you share online.

Where I come from, that's called "blaming the victim."

Anonymous wrote:Yeah sorry OP but custody ain't happening.

Not over this shit, no it won't.

It does, however, make her rather unpleasant to be around. I can't deny that, and all the people in here giving the wife every benefit of the doubt won't change the reality of what you're going through.

And -- let's face it -- sometimes one party is the lion's share of the problem in a marriage. If a SAHM with one kid -- schoolaged no less -- cannot find it within herself to take her kid to school (or at least ensure the kid gets to the bus stop), there's something seriously wrong here. And if you're just understanding and kind without doing it smartly, you'll find yourself doing everything and that her expectations of what you do will just ratchet upwards.

12:07, I would like to know how OP's wife declaring the evening before that OP has to take his kids to school (in the middle of these important meetings no less) is being a team player.

Other random points:
1. If she goes to work/you demand she return to work, prepare to have her work suddenly mean she can't do anything kid-related and that you (or someone you hire) will have to do it all now. Or, she will half-ass her job search for a few months in the hopes that you'll get off her back.

2. How often are these crunch times? If it's more than once a month, you may as well admit to yourself that this sort of thing is normal and respond within your job and/or arrange for help accordingly.

Anonymous wrote:You sound like an ass. Ok. So you are far more important than your wife. We get it. Go tell a judge. You get huge child support and alimony and every other weekend visits. You said you are too busy to take your kid to school. So, how would parenting without her be?

Now, if I were you, I would say you are sorry and do something nice for her given all the hours you are working.

Given that she seems to randomly decide she's too important to take her kid to school every now and then despite, you know, not having a job, I guess there's not much difference between parenting with her and without her.

You need to stop engaging with her. She's "crazy making."

That said, you need to re-think how much you share online.

Anonymous wrote:You sound like an ass. Ok. So you are far more important than your wife. We get it. Go tell a judge. You get huge child support and alimony and every other weekend visits. You said you are too busy to take your kid to school. So, how would parenting without her be?

Now, if I were you, I would say you are sorry and do something nice for her given all the hours you are working.

Not OP and a SAHM -- are you kidding? That's why a parent stays at home -- so that the DC has a stable situation and the working parent can focus on work.

F counseling. Get a divorce. You and your daughter deserve better.

I always put my husband first. Why ? Because he brought home the money, money that kept us fed, clothed and living well. There is no excuse for a SAHM to shirk her obligations.

God I hate lazy entitled women.