Anonymous wrote:Another approach ~ do you get a thank you? If you don't happen to get a thank you - for say 2 years in a row - I would stop sending to that relative regardless of age.

My grandmother did this, and then upped it by making the rule that you must also send her a card for the occasion. No birthday card for her, no birthday card or check for you.

In our family godparents and godchildren exchange gifts with each other indefinitely. Otherwise, the aunts and uncles are each assigned a specific niece or nephew (or grandniece or grandnephew) to buy for for birthday and Christmas each year. You age out the Christmas after college (undergrad) graduation, whether you have a job or are continuing your education.

I would stop after the 4 years of college. If there is a particular niece/nephew that you think needs extra help just mail thenma gift card at another time of year.

My grandmother stopped when her grandkids hit 18 (she did have a dozen of them). Stop at the same point for all of them--if that's graduation from college, or age 21, or whatever, pick it and stick with it.

My aunts and uncles gave through college (I think) and then most trickled off. I have one aunt who gave me a gift until I had DD and now DD gets the presents (I've been usurped!) and another aunt who does homemade wine who gives us a bottle when we are there, but no one else of that generation gives us gifts anymore.