Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find it odd that your BIL didn't know if the kids were with him this year for Christmas. All divorced with kids families I know have custody agreements that specifically detail holidays.

Does he not have a custody agreement and/or pay support?

Yes he certainly does which is why I am so annoyed.

Oh DH asked MIL that and she said no they just decide each year. I know the divorce and custody dragged out but it's all officially done now.

Anonymous wrote:I find it odd that your BIL didn't know if the kids were with him this year for Christmas. All divorced with kids families I know have custody agreements that specifically detail holidays.

Does he not have a custody agreement and/or pay support?

Yes he certainly does which is why I am so annoyed.

I find it odd that your BIL didn't know if the kids were with him this year for Christmas. All divorced with kids families I know have custody agreements that specifically detail holidays.

Does he not have a custody agreement and/or pay support?

Anonymous wrote:
OP is navel-gazing and puffed up with self-importance.
She should be glad she is not in BIL's situation. Could be he's a push-over, could be he's dealing with an irrational wife who could restrict his access to his kids if he handles things the wrong way.

Of course you're upset at everyone else's incompetence, OP.
Try to be a little more patient and tolerant. It will serve you well in the future.

His ex is an anorexic Bitch. She has always been that way. I tired to warn him before he married her. All she wasted was his money and live a life like mine. But sadly, he is lazy and this infuriated her. It bothered her that she couldn't be a SAHM like she always planned. It didn't last long after that.

In the future regarding Xmas, I will give my side of the family first choice,MIL can pound dirt.

OP is navel-gazing and puffed up with self-importance.
She should be glad she is not in BIL's situation. Could be he's a push-over, could be he's dealing with an irrational wife who could restrict his access to his kids if he handles things the wrong way.

Of course you're upset at everyone else's incompetence, OP.
Try to be a little more patient and tolerant. It will serve you well in the future.

Glad it's settled, but it probably won't be the last time. Custody negotiations are difficult and especially at holiday times - even when all parties are amicable it's still tough.

Have a little more compassion for BIL and what he's juggling and for MIL who is just trying to figure out how to get her family together. You sound pretty self-centered. If you need/want to accept other invitations - fine. But don't carry on as though everyone else's challenges are insignificant/inconsiderate in the face of your social opportunities.