I think this idiot purposely destroyed your things just so when you broke up, he would still have contact with you. It's a sick form of control OP.

He wants you to take him to court. He wants to be able to have that connection with you. He doesn't want to sever ties with you and he knows if he damages your things, that when you try to leave his ass, you will also try to sue his ass for all the things he destroyed.

He is secretly hoping he will see you in court and if you win, he will have your address so he can "send" you your judgement monies.

It's a sick ploy.

You're kidding, right? He sounds like he'd slash your tires.

Walk away, do not look back, do not collect small claims. Never tolerate one second of bad behavior again.

Anonymous wrote:if It was me, I wouldn't want to revisit it or air it in court in front of all the people there. You could get a judgement and you probably will, but then you would need to collect it. a whole new hassle which would keep reminding you of all the ugliness. He sounds really unstable, you would be best off getting far away with no more contact and chalk this up to what not to chose in a man. Best of luck and please don't take him back.

Exactly, he sounds unstable and you shouldn't have contact with him anymore. Chalk this up to an expensive lesson learned. If you press charges you won't be rid of him.

Anonymous wrote:Lawyer here. Anyone can take anyone to court. That's not the question. As my Civil Procedure professor said "You can sue the Bishop of Boston for bastardy. But can you collect?"

As others have pointed out, getting a judgment will be meaningless. Good luck collecting. You would have to enforce liens, and involve this person in your life for years. And you would have attorney fees, collection agency fees that would probably outweigh everything you collect.

Move on, OP.

Yep. Also consider: unless you want to pay a lawyer to represent you, you'll be spending time navigating the paperwork required by small claims court and you'll be taking time off to attend court dates. Totally not worth it, even if you win.

And you may not win -- it will be your word against his, and everyone will ask why you didn't call the police about the property damage/theft when it happened, if it was really so bad.

Cut your losses.

Anonymous wrote:Consider it an expensive (and incredibly valuable) life lesson and just move on.

Pursuing legal action means continuing contact w/ someone you should want to put fully in your rearview mirror.

This. And I wonder - Is it possible that you actually want to continue the contact? Sometimes we become addicted to the drama.

Let it go.

I see these types of cases ALL the time on Judge Judy. They do make interesting T.V. and in most cases, Judge Judy usually believes the perpetrator even though it is a "He said...She said" type situation." However, even if you do win, it will be a long and drawn out process to collect a penny from this nutcase. He will play you like a drum and will stress you out again and again. You're much better off cutting your losses now and just sucking it up and moving on.

Had you stayed with this creep, eventually he would have turned his abuse toward you, I guarantee you. I am glad you left him. Usually abusers start off by physically damaging possessions to make their victims feel helpless. They like to feel superior and establish control. That then proceeds to physical bodily harm.

Consider it an expensive (and incredibly valuable) life lesson and just move on.

Pursuing legal action means continuing contact w/ someone you should want to put fully in your rearview mirror.

Another voice added to the chorus of posters advising you to let it go. You might win a judgment, but the process of suing him and then trying to collect the money will just keep him in your life longer and prolong the negative emotions and energy you've invested in this guy. Cut your losses and focus on figuring out why you tolerated this kind of treatment for so long and how you can avoid making similar mistakes in the future.

Anonymous wrote:Some of life's lessons are expensive, in dollars. You just spent a lot of money to learn one. Move on.

Agree. Don't enrage him further.

Lawyer here. Anyone can take anyone to court. That's not the question. As my Civil Procedure professor said "You can sue the Bishop of Boston for bastardy. But can you collect?"

As others have pointed out, getting a judgment will be meaningless. Good luck collecting. You would have to enforce liens, and involve this person in your life for years. And you would have attorney fees, collection agency fees that would probably outweigh everything you collect.

Move on, OP.

I don't know whether it could help in this case or not, but you might check your homeowner's or renter's insurance policy to see what kind of damage it covers. It's a different situation, but when my purse was stolen, my insurance covered everything.

Cut all contact completely. Suing him is contact. This guy is. It's and dangerous. Please stay away from him permanently.

Count yourself lucky you weren't hurt or killed. All those things can be replaced, you can't. Move on and don't look back.

He's violent; you should cut your losses while you can before he starts hitting you!