Anonymous wrote:Don't give a rat's ass what my MIL thinks. Why should I?

So true.

Anonymous wrote:Yes. My MIL does this. Her DH didn't really do a lot with the kids and I think it makes her happy to see her son so involved with his own. I don't see it as a slight in anyway, and I really think some of you are far too sensitive. I just comment right back "well, I just knew how to pick a man who was raised right!" and give her a smile. We're lucky to have each other. My MIL also tells my DH that my kids and he are lucky to have me because she likes the job I am doing as a SAHM. Should he be taking that as an insult? He's happy that his mom approves of his choices. Seriously. There are far bigger problems.

+1

Anonymous



Maybe she was saying that because she was looking back at her parenting experience, and her husband never helped.

Good grief, ladies. Come ack when you have a real issue to get worked up over. You all sound whiny, insecure and self-absorbed. Grow up.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:...visit and then comment to their DIL how MUCH their son does with the one year old child and how LUCKY she is? Apparently not every man is so wonderful.

Yes.

I'll allow it, though, because DH's dad really didn't do much with the kids at all. She's surprised be how much DH does because FIL was useless. It's a good change and I'm okay with her praising DH for it.

Well, does your mother point out constantly to your husband how lucky he is to have a wife who shares in the financial responsibilities?

Actually, my mom does kind of constantly point out to my DH and I how lucky we are to have found each other and to have the relationship we have (MIL does too)- I think maybe that there is a possibility that its just that my own mom and MIL are more focused on the whole rather than money vs. house parts of a relationship- but that doesn't necessarily mean OPs MIL is trying to be malicious- she may just come from another generation and wants to praise her son and doesn't realize how its coming off. I would bet that the OP probably doesn't particularly like her MIL anyway- you know how when you don't care for someone, even the innocuous things they do are annoying?

Nope, my MIL is utterly clueless to the fact that my husband does anything as a father. She directs any child related comment or inquiry towards me, and I find it completely sexist and infuriating. She will actually ask him to put me on the phone if she wants to know anything about the children. Drives me CRAZY.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. My MIL does this. Her DH didn't really do a lot with the kids and I think it makes her happy to see her son so involved with his own. I don't see it as a slight in anyway, and I really think some of you are far too sensitive. I just comment right back "well, I just knew how to pick a man who was raised right!" and give her a smile. We're lucky to have each other. My MIL also tells my DH that my kids and he are lucky to have me because she likes the job I am doing as a SAHM. Should he be taking that as an insult? He's happy that his mom approves of his choices. Seriously. There are far bigger problems.

How was your DH "raised right" when his father didn't do jack?

Well, he was raised right by his mother. That comment is a nod to her. Plus, it was a different time that he was raised in and the expectations of men were much lower in the childcare department. My DH has inspired his father to be a much more involved grandparent. So yes, he was definitely "raised right". You keep on trying to pick a fight though, honey. I see that approach working much better than not sweating the small stuff with my inlaws.

My MIL used to say that I was very lucky that her son helped with the kids, since I was a SAHM (I took breaks with each kid).

My reply was that there would be grave implications on the state of my marriage if the gentleman who was my neighbor wanted to help raise these kids. She never said anything after that.

Don't give a rat's ass what my MIL thinks. Why should I?

Anonymous wrote:Yes. My MIL does this. Her DH didn't really do a lot with the kids and I think it makes her happy to see her son so involved with his own. I don't see it as a slight in anyway, and I really think some of you are far too sensitive. I just comment right back "well, I just knew how to pick a man who was raised right!" and give her a smile. We're lucky to have each other. My MIL also tells my DH that my kids and he are lucky to have me because she likes the job I am doing as a SAHM. Should he be taking that as an insult? He's happy that his mom approves of his choices. Seriously. There are far bigger problems.

How was your DH "raised right" when his father didn't do jack?

Yes. My MIL does this. Her DH didn't really do a lot with the kids and I think it makes her happy to see her son so involved with his own. I don't see it as a slight in anyway, and I really think some of you are far too sensitive. I just comment right back "well, I just knew how to pick a man who was raised right!" and give her a smile. We're lucky to have each other. My MIL also tells my DH that my kids and he are lucky to have me because she likes the job I am doing as a SAHM. Should he be taking that as an insult? He's happy that his mom approves of his choices. Seriously. There are far bigger problems.

13:46 - PLEASE POST!

Never. She's a cool MIL and I'm lucky to have her.

Anonymous wrote:OP.
(And he is truly wonderful, it just doesn't make me lucky.)

If you don't consider yourself lucky that your husband is "truly wonderful," you should read this board more. Plenty of sad sack posters who, according to them, are far less lucky.

Anonymous wrote:My MIL does this and so much worse. I so much want to post her Thanksgiving antics (and complete lack of boundaries) but don't want it to be traced to me somehow. And I know I'm actually lucky because she loves me and is well intentioned.

PP, that's great you recognize that she loves you. Such antics can be very difficult, but I wish more of my friends recognized that their ILs love them. Mine drives me crazy, and she lives most of her life out of bounds, but she unconditionally loves me, our kids, and DH.