I think some people have been taught that it is polite conversation to compliment the house they are visiting. Some move directly to that sort of conversation, but most don't. We had a parent over who felt compelled to 'compliment' my house, which I was a little over the top as she was clearly grasping for things. It was a little weird and she probably said a few awkward things - but I didn't take it personally and just chalked it up to her trying too hard. If she was judging, it just didn't matter to me. There are just too many dimensions in the realm of 'judging' other parents - I just don't 'go there'.

That said, if there is someone who is clearly mean - I just stay polite and cordial and let the kids have their relationship.

Anonymous wrote:I am trying to be friendly but people are too competitive insecure, we had a family over the other day and the parents started commenting how bigger their house was compared to ours... Oh their bathroom is bigger! WTF?

Hello GDS parent.

I see a lot of this. Drama. It's intimidating being in a private school at times esp if you didn't grow up going to one and sometimes easier to just say people are mean because you feel intimidated. Most people in the world are nice and I find if you look for nice qualities you will find them. I also see when people want to leave a private school they sort of look for problems to justify. Usually when people complain a lot, I sort of shy away because they are real problems in the world and getting made over a dumb comment just doesn't merit angst with me.

Why does everyone assume the OP described the situation accurately?

At first these parents were expressly talking about how much bigger their house was. But then they just described her house as "cute," which she inferred was somehow meant as a comparison to the size of their house. Certainly not the most natural reading of the comment.

And is that all that they did? Was the experience otherwise pleasant?

It seems like a possibility is that she didn't want to like them and is projecting.

Anonymous wrote:I'm pretty friendly with my kids friends parents. Some of them are in my neighborhood others a few miles away. I don't like the competitive parents who come in your house and are obviously looking around to see what you have. I once hosted our annual neighborhood holiday party, I had a couple walk around the first floor of my home, loudly saying of they don't have the upgraded cabinets, oh look they have hardwood throughout the first floor, etc. I was so damn annoyed.

House Hunters! Tee hee.

We avoid them. Most are boring/annoying. Life is too short.

My kids have attended 3 different schools. We've become quite friendly with some parents from 2, less so from the 3rd (high school so it's a little harder to connect with parents). We never experienced anything like the OP suggested. I don't think we were picking only the nice people but perhaps we were. I just didn't get a competitive vibe from people at all.

I'm friendly to all of them. I'm friends with the ones I like personally.

If other parents feel the need to make a dig at my expense to make themselves feel better, then that is their issue to overcome, and I give them plenty of space to go do it. I don't let other people's problems become my problems, you know?