Id I RSVPed yes and had to cancel at the last minute-YES!

We had one kid not able to make it at the last minute, and didn't get a gift. We didn't mind at all. Honestly, for school acquaintances, it's a generic little boy/girl gift anyhow, so I'd save it for the next party! If it's a more special friend, you could bring it to school and put it in their cubby to take home.

The one time this happened to us, we already had a gift so we sent it along with another parent who was attending the party.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For a last minute cancellation I would definitely find a way to get the gift to the child. The family planned on your kids being there and possibly paid for favors, food, etc. Kids get sick and there's nothing you can do, but it is nice to follow through with the gift, especially sombe you have already bought it if you were planning on going. On the other hand, if I say from the beginning that we can't make it to a party, I don't give a gift.

THIS

If you say no in advance, no need to buy a present. If you cancel last minute, get the present to the child. Plan on a playdate.

I really try not to think this way. If I throw a party and invite you, it is because I want you to come. I appreciate that you came. I could care less about a gift. I understand last minute cancellations. Thanks for letting me know--you do not owe me anything! Either give a gift or don't, but do not feel obligated.

Anonymous wrote:For a last minute cancellation I would definitely find a way to get the gift to the child. The family planned on your kids being there and possibly paid for favors, food, etc. Kids get sick and there's nothing you can do, but it is nice to follow through with the gift, especially sombe you have already bought it if you were planning on going. On the other hand, if I say from the beginning that we can't make it to a party, I don't give a gift.

THIS

If you say no in advance, no need to buy a present. If you cancel last minute, get the present to the child. Plan on a playdate.

I'd save it for the next party.

In this case I would try and give the gift. Handing it off at pick up would be fine. If at all possible it would be even nicer if you could have the kids (yours and bday child) get together for a playdate and give it then. One of my son's classmates got sick the day of the party and had to miss. The mom invited my son over the next week and the boys played. She made them a special treat (brownies) and my son opened his gift. I have to admit I was very touched by it all. It was not anything fancy but the boys have been good friends ever since.

I would. They planned for you to be there and it would be a nice gesture.

This has happened to us only once, and I had the gift but didn't give it. It was literally the last minute, DS developed strep throat and couldn't go. This is a family we never saw outside of school (and at school saw only the kid and nanny, never parents). I held onto it for weeks thinking I'd see the mom at some point, and never did, so didn't give it. Like PPs mentioned I didn't want to bring it to school because I didn't want to underscore the fact that not everyone might have been invited and/or wasn't sure what the school policy might be about a child opening a gift at school (there is a no-toys-from-home policy and I didn't know how the teacher would view it).

FWIW we have also had a couple of very last-minute cancellations (i.e. said they were coming and then emailed or texted after the fact to say they couldn't) and I would have been shocked if we received a gift in those situations.

I'm not sure I would take it to school. I wouldn't want this because I only invited a few kids from school and wouldn't want other kids/parents to see this and feel bad. I don't think you need to give it, but if you want, I would mail or drop it off at their house.

Depends on if it is a good friend. If I know you well enough to do a playdate, I would give it to you the next time we hang out. If we never hang out outside of school, probably not.