Anonymous wrote:Rule #1 for having an affair and keeping your sanity is to NEVER have an affair with someone you know, either through work or home. It's too close for comfort.

If you're going to fuck around, don't do it with someone who can blow up your life in the blink of an eye.

Do you speak from experience?

Anonymous wrote:Rule #1 for having an affair and keeping your sanity is to NEVER have an affair with someone you know, either through work or home. It's too close for comfort.

If you're going to fuck around, don't do it with someone who can blow up your life in the blink of an eye.

Great advice.

Rule #1 for having an affair and keeping your sanity is to NEVER have an affair with someone you know, either through work or home. It's too close for comfort.

If you're going to fuck around, don't do it with someone who can blow up your life in the blink of an eye.

Of course it's a huge mistake. Nothing is wrong with your life yet you are willing to torpedo it and hurt your entire family for... some excitement?

Not if you really want to end your marriage but just can't bring yourself to do it in a direct, honest way.

And not if you don't care about the pain to yourself and whomever else might end up involved (the other party, another spouse, friends, kids, etc...)

And not if you'll still respect yourself when it's all done.

It seems insane to me that you are 40+ years old and have to ask if this is a mistake. Go for it. Be prepared to completely implode your marriage as a result.

Yes, it's a huge mistake. Even if you don't wind up losing your marriage, kids, etc, you will lose your integrity. Not worth it.

You want to be 45 and divorced? You want to ruin another person's family?

It's only a mistake if you would regret losing your husband and your family. If you have kids, think of how they would view you? Are you ready for a divorce or to blow up your family? Can you handle the guilt? Once something happens, there is no turning back.

Ask your husband what he thinks.

There are on occasion some happy endings but more often than not, serious regret and pain over hurting those you claim you love. You could really do damage to your kids and your husband. Not to mention I think I read he is married too? So, its two families you will devastate all for a roll in the hay, so not worth it.

If you really don't think you love your husband anymore, that is a totally separate issue and one you really need to be truthful about. It is so normal to think or even fantasize about being with someone else when you have been married so long. I saw an old college flame at a recent reunion who if possible got even better looking than when I dated him AND hes not married, and believe me if I wasn't married, I would have been all over him but the thought never corseted my mind, I just admired from afar

Have fun in your mind and play out all the scenarios you want/ need to but honey don't act on it...you will likely regret it for the rest of your life.

Want to exchange #s?

You are being a selfish whore/bitch. How would your husband feel if he knew? There is your answer.

Could be a good decision if your husband finds out, you get divorced, and it turns out to be an improvement for you to be on your own after all. But you'd have to go through a lot of pain to get there. I think the pp who suggested divorce first is right. That way you can do it on your own time and have (some aspects of) it under control.

So, so not worth it. You'll regret it OP, but you probably already know that. And it could cost you your spouse, marriage, family (etc).