Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again. As far as the college experience, I'm talking about learning to live away from home and managing on your own, getting exposed to a new city/town ... I'm not talking about partying. That could happen wherever they go.

For me, moving away was part of growing up. I guess I see it as an important part of that transition to adulthood.

And yet, many people become adults without ever leaving their hometown. My dad never left his home city, but he got a job, got married, raised kids, etc. Moving from NOVA to Charlottesville isn't really that big of a change, anyway. It's what, 60-90 minutes away? Plus, you have no idea what tuition will be, what acceptance rates and patterns will look like, etc., in a few years. Better stay where you are happy than uproot your life for a big what-if.

Well, sure, but depending on the person that is kind of limiting. I grew up outside of Philadelphia and couldn't wait to experience a different place. I went to school in New England and studied abroad on scholarships; it was fantastic. I couldn't imagine why so many of my classmates went to school in Philly (they could have afforded to go anywhere so it wasn't the money) and then stayed there, without ever exploring. Fast forward 10 years, I returned to Phillly for a job and loved it; I definitely could have made a life there if that had worked out. But I'm glad I had the opportunity to live elsewhere and travel. Of course not everyone has that opportunity, but if you do, I should think you'd want to take advantage of it.

Anonymous wrote:OP here again. As far as the college experience, I'm talking about learning to live away from home and managing on your own, getting exposed to a new city/town ... I'm not talking about partying. That could happen wherever they go.

For me, moving away was part of growing up. I guess I see it as an important part of that transition to adulthood.

And yet, many people become adults without ever leaving their hometown. My dad never left his home city, but he got a job, got married, raised kids, etc. Moving from NOVA to Charlottesville isn't really that big of a change, anyway. It's what, 60-90 minutes away? Plus, you have no idea what tuition will be, what acceptance rates and patterns will look like, etc., in a few years. Better stay where you are happy than uproot your life for a big what-if.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another exception in VA is if a parent works in VA and pays VA state income taxes then your child can get in-state tuition. You would need to do this at least a year in advance. That might be easier then moving your whole family.

If you live in MD and work in DC, you do not pay VA income tax, due to tax reciprocity agreements between the states. Besides, the proof of residency in VA usually includes that the person has RESIDED in VA for a year.

§ 23-7.4:2. Eligibility for in-state or reduced tuition for students not domiciled in Virginia; tuition grants and in-state tuition for members of the National Guard.


A. Students who live outside the Commonwealth and have been employed full time inside Virginia for at least one year immediately prior to the date of the alleged entitlement for in-state tuition shall be eligible for in-state tuition charges if such student has paid Virginia income taxes on all taxable income earned in the Commonwealth for the tax year prior to the date of the alleged entitlement. Students claimed as dependents for federal and Virginia income tax purposes who live outside the Commonwealth shall become eligible for in-state tuition charges if the nonresident parents claiming them as dependents have been employed full time inside Virginia for at least one year immediately prior to the date of the alleged entitlement and paid Virginia income taxes on all taxable income earned in the Commonwealth for the tax year prior to the date of the alleged entitlement. Such students shall continue to be eligible for in-state tuition charges for so long as they or their qualifying parent is employed full time in Virginia, paying Virginia income taxes on all taxable income earned in the Commonwealth and the student is claimed as a dependent for Virginia and federal income tax purposes.

Extremely high standard to meet, and the Commonwealth is going after people claiming to be instate and suing for out of state tuition, even in ridiculous circumstances. It is never, NEVER easy to get residency, I can't imagine it will get easier


http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/the-state-of-nova/post/va-law-forces-gmu-to-reject-daughter-of-homicide-victim-10-year-virginia-resident-for-in-state-tuition/2013/03/01/fe2cc998-8117-11e2-a350-49866afab584_blog.html

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/local/wp/2013/05/07/george-mason-drops-appeal-navy-vet-stephanie-kermgard-wins-in-state-tuition-case/

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again. As far as the college experience, I'm talking about learning to live away from home and managing on your own, getting exposed to a new city/town ... I'm not talking about partying. That could happen wherever they go.

For me, moving away was part of growing up. I guess I see it as an important part of that transition to adulthood.

"Managing on your own" while someone else is footing the bill doesn't prepare one for adulthood. College is one big bubble, and not at all similar to adult life, quite the opposite. it's even less similar than living with parents where at least you need to adapt to the person who holds the purse (something that will be happening to the rest of one's life).

NP here. I disagree with this as too broad a statement. It all depends on the situation. My oldest kid goes to an out of state school. She has scholarships and such and we pay the difference with her tuition. But she has to work to pay her rent and buy her groceries. So we are "footing" her education bill and she is managing her "living" bill. My second oldest is on athletic scholarship and she EARNS every penny. Not every college experience involves the parents footing the entire bill. I told my kids that if they wanted to go out of state, they had to have skin in the game. They have done that and they are learning life management. Frankly, I know very few familes with kids in college and the parents are paying the full freight.

I personally appreciated the opportunity to experience another part of the country for college. I definitely think it was part of my "education" to go away from home. It had nothing to do with partying.

That said, I don't think it is a necessity, and it may be a luxury I won't be able to provide for my own children.

We live in VA and have/will have saved enough for our kids to attend VA state schools. We won't have enough money to send them anywhere they want, unless they get merit aid. (We won't qualify for enough financial aid to bring the cost of many private schools down to the cost of in-state public.) And while I am okay with my kids taking on a modicum of debt to attend college, I am not okay with their mortgaging their future to do so.

So they may HAVE to go to school in-state, however much I or they would like the chance to experience another part of the country, and so I am glad that I live in a state (VA) with good state options. That said, I think MD had pretty good state options as well, and I don't know that I would move to VA solely because of college. As for alternatives to UMD, don't forget about St. Mary's, which I've heard great things about.

I know it is nice to be able to think about sending kids wherever they want to go, to their dream schools, but the reality is that this is not a viable option for many, many families, and I don't think parents should necessarily feel bad if it isn't. My kids have had almost zero input into their educational choices thus far. They go to school where we have told them to go. If they have limited choices for college, is that really such a disservice?

Anonymous wrote:I live in Montgomery County and really like it, MS- age kids are happy in good schools, we like our house ...

but I keep looking at in-state tuition for very good Virginia universities and comparing it with our more limited options in Maryland. Aside from UM College Park, I don't know that there are really attractive options. And even College Park isn't ideal -- so large, and not really far enough away from home to constitute what I consider a real college experience.

Contrast that with Virginia options ... UVA, William and Mary, Virginia Tech, and JMU ... they all seem so much better. And the difference between in-state and out-of-state tuition is so significant. I could pay my kids' tuition in state without any issue at all.

Would you move just to get in-state tuition in Virginia?

Are you even familiar with MD state colleges. You have a wide range of choices: Frostburg State, Morgan State, Salisbury State, St. Mary's, Towson, UMBC, UMES, Coppin State, Bowie State.

I think once you get past the VA flagships, which if you move to Fairfax will be hard as hell to get into, they are really all in there together.

We have three children and paid their in-state tuition at three Virginia schools: VT, JMU, & UMW (Mary Washington in Fredricksburg). I attended George Mason (GMU) and DH was ROTC at VT. I feel very fortunate that everyone is gainfully employed in their field and we have no college loan debt. All of us loved our college experiences. Only the VT Aerospace Engineer was tempted to try out of state at Georgia Tech where he would have had to pay the difference himself. In the end, he opted to stay in-state and out of debt. He now works in Seattle at Boeing.

If you move to Virginia, welcome! We wish you all the best.

Anonymous wrote:OP here again. As far as the college experience, I'm talking about learning to live away from home and managing on your own, getting exposed to a new city/town ... I'm not talking about partying. That could happen wherever they go.

For me, moving away was part of growing up. I guess I see it as an important part of that transition to adulthood.

"Managing on your own" while someone else is footing the bill doesn't prepare one for adulthood. College is one big bubble, and not at all similar to adult life, quite the opposite. it's even less similar than living with parents where at least you need to adapt to the person who holds the purse (something that will be happening to the rest of one's life).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Another exception in VA is if a parent works in VA and pays VA state income taxes then your child can get in-state tuition. You would need to do this at least a year in advance. That might be easier then moving your whole family.

If you live in MD and work in DC, you do not pay VA income tax, due to tax reciprocity agreements between the states. Besides, the proof of residency in VA usually includes that the person has RESIDED in VA for a year.

§ 23-7.4:2. Eligibility for in-state or reduced tuition for students not domiciled in Virginia; tuition grants and in-state tuition for members of the National Guard.


A. Students who live outside the Commonwealth and have been employed full time inside Virginia for at least one year immediately prior to the date of the alleged entitlement for in-state tuition shall be eligible for in-state tuition charges if such student has paid Virginia income taxes on all taxable income earned in the Commonwealth for the tax year prior to the date of the alleged entitlement. Students claimed as dependents for federal and Virginia income tax purposes who live outside the Commonwealth shall become eligible for in-state tuition charges if the nonresident parents claiming them as dependents have been employed full time inside Virginia for at least one year immediately prior to the date of the alleged entitlement and paid Virginia income taxes on all taxable income earned in the Commonwealth for the tax year prior to the date of the alleged entitlement. Such students shall continue to be eligible for in-state tuition charges for so long as they or their qualifying parent is employed full time in Virginia, paying Virginia income taxes on all taxable income earned in the Commonwealth and the student is claimed as a dependent for Virginia and federal income tax purposes.

OP here again. As far as the college experience, I'm talking about learning to live away from home and managing on your own, getting exposed to a new city/town ... I'm not talking about partying. That could happen wherever they go.

For me, moving away was part of growing up. I guess I see it as an important part of that transition to adulthood.

Anonymous wrote:So your kids have to go to a state school? That's awfully limiting. What if they want to go to Pennsylvania, or Massachusetts, or California? Or what if they would prefer a smaller college?

In other words, no WAY would I move for this reason.

This may be what we can realistically afford.

I went to an expensive private college but my entire tuition bill for 4 years was $40K. (Dating myself, I know.) Now two kids in private college is $350K. We have a good HHI and have saved some, but I just can't see how that's realistic.

Certainly I will encourage them to apply and it's possible that they will get scholarships, etc. But I'm trying to make sure we have a reasonable plan B.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I live in Montgomery County and really like it, MS- age kids are happy in good schools, we like our house ...

but I keep looking at in-state tuition for very good Virginia universities and comparing it with our more limited options in Maryland. Aside from UM College Park, I don't know that there are really attractive options. And even College Park isn't ideal -- so large, and not really far enough away from home to constitute what I consider a real college experience.

Contrast that with Virginia options ... UVA, William and Mary, Virginia Tech, and JMU ... they all seem so much better. And the difference between in-state and out-of-state tuition is so significant. I could pay my kids' tuition in state without any issue at all.

Would you move just to get in-state tuition in Virginia?

Right, because they won't be able to party all day without parental supervision? My kids are going to attend college from home. There, I said. I am from Europe, and it's very common there, and both DH and I did it. I find American approach to college ridiculous, parents paying tens of thousands of dollars to have immature persons attend party schools (pretty much all schools, compared to where I went to college) thousands of miles away. No, thanks.

I don't get the emphasis on the "college experience" either. I thought people go to college for an education, not an experience. It is just such a bizarre way of looking at such an expensive investment to me and I'm not sure uprooting kids from their support systems and communities is that good for them either.

My daughter may or may not attend college from home but thankfully the conversation is centered on her specific interests in majors and not "experience."

By the time today's young kids are ready for college, who knows if a.) the in-state tuition deal will have been defeated or b.) if online college courses (Coursera, etc.) will be fully accredited and all the rage.

Plan all you want, OP. but you won't know where your kids will wind up until they go through the process. Life has a way of kicking you in the teeth. So live where you all will be happy and deal with the college stuff later.

Anonymous wrote:I live in Montgomery County and really like it, MS- age kids are happy in good schools, we like our house ...

but I keep looking at in-state tuition for very good Virginia universities and comparing it with our more limited options in Maryland. Aside from UM College Park, I don't know that there are really attractive options. And even College Park isn't ideal -- so large, and not really far enough away from home to constitute what I consider a real college experience.

Contrast that with Virginia options ... UVA, William and Mary, Virginia Tech, and JMU ... they all seem so much better. And the difference between in-state and out-of-state tuition is so significant. I could pay my kids' tuition in state without any issue at all.

Would you move just to get in-state tuition in Virginia?

Right, because they won't be able to party all day without parental supervision? My kids are going to attend college from home. There, I said. I am from Europe, and it's very common there, and both DH and I did it. I find American approach to college ridiculous, parents paying tens of thousands of dollars to have immature persons attend party schools (pretty much all schools, compared to where I went to college) thousands of miles away. No, thanks.