I told my husband and he said he would have said he was gay to the cows came home if it meant he could sleep over in a girl "friend"

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like to think that my "gaydar" is functional but this guy did not read gay to me at all.

No, your gaydar isn't functional. It identifies people who you think are gay. But there are gay people who do not act the way you think gay people act, and there are also non-gay people who do act the way you think the gay people act.

Ok well I know gay teens, and he doesn't act like them. Call it my stereotyping, but there are certain cues that read "not gay" to me.

OP, you are issuing certain cues that read "dumb ass" to me.

To each his own.

lol I'm 32 and I still sleep with friends. Not even a big deal. Mom why do you care what we think if you were comfortable with it?

Anonymous wrote:People really freak out about some crazy things here...my teenage daughter has her female friends sleep over all the time and they are almost always sleeping together in her queen size bed - unless there are too many of them and they all sleep in the basement on inflatable mattresses. Nothing wrong with that and I personally think it's weird that parents (especially the PP who hasn't allowed it since age 7 years) think that it is wrong to allow same bed sleeping for same-sex friends. It makes me think they are a little "fire and brimstone" in their outlook on the world....

BUT - I would be careful about the "gay" friend sleeping with your daughter, OP. I agree with the PP that there is plenty of experimenting happening with teens. Your daughter may be absolutely telling you the truth, but be prepared to find out something different.

THIS!!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like to think that my "gaydar" is functional but this guy did not read gay to me at all.

No, your gaydar isn't functional. It identifies people who you think are gay. But there are gay people who do not act the way you think gay people act, and there are also non-gay people who do act the way you think the gay people act.

Ok well I know gay teens, and he doesn't act like them. Call it my stereotyping, but there are certain cues that read "not gay" to me.

It is absolutely your stereotyping.

Anonymous wrote:you got played, mom

+1

People really freak out about some crazy things here...my teenage daughter has her female friends sleep over all the time and they are almost always sleeping together in her queen size bed - unless there are too many of them and they all sleep in the basement on inflatable mattresses. Nothing wrong with that and I personally think it's weird that parents (especially the PP who hasn't allowed it since age 7 years) think that it is wrong to allow same bed sleeping for same-sex friends. It makes me think they are a little "fire and brimstone" in their outlook on the world....

BUT - I would be careful about the "gay" friend sleeping with your daughter, OP. I agree with the PP that there is plenty of experimenting happening with teens. Your daughter may be absolutely telling you the truth, but be prepared to find out something different.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like to think that my "gaydar" is functional but this guy did not read gay to me at all.

No, your gaydar isn't functional. It identifies people who you think are gay. But there are gay people who do not act the way you think gay people act, and there are also non-gay people who do act the way you think the gay people act.

Ok well I know gay teens, and he doesn't act like them. Call it my stereotyping, but there are certain cues that read "not gay" to me.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Once you hit middle school you do not share a bed and girls and boys do not share the same sleeping room (Like if all the boys are in the basement or the loft the girls are in the opposite... and the dog barks if you walk around).

This assumes that everybody is heterosexual.

Everybody does not have to be heterosexual we just need to make sure all but 1.

I always shared a bed when I slept over with a very close female friend. We just slept. And we did this through high school and once when we were backpacking in Europe together and only a king bed was available.

my first roommate in college slept with her best friend who was a gay guy. I walked in on them. He was most certainly gay, but also experimenting.

And they didn't inhale, either.

Anonymous wrote:Once you hit middle school you do not share a bed and girls and boys do not share the same sleeping room (Like if all the boys are in the basement or the loft the girls are in the opposite... and the dog barks if you walk around).

This assumes that everybody is heterosexual.

Anonymous wrote:I like to think that my "gaydar" is functional but this guy did not read gay to me at all.

No, your gaydar isn't functional. It identifies people who you think are gay. But there are gay people who do not act the way you think gay people act, and there are also non-gay people who do act the way you think the gay people act.

We have a beach house so we deal with how to dole out the beds on many occasions.

Once you hit middle school you do not share a bed and girls and boys do not share the same sleeping room (Like if all the boys are in the basement or the loft the girls are in the opposite... and the dog barks if you walk around).