This is ridiculous. Very few 3 yr old are able to wipe properly. I have been a licensed in home daycare for 15 yrs and was wiping until they are able to which is between 4-5 yrs old. No one ever questioned my actions. I however had an almost 5 yr child who came to my after school program with bits of poop in her underwear more than once and we had to throw undies away and give her a shower, and her mom started leaving spare underwear with me since the school would not touch it and the poor kid wore her poop on her half day if she happened to have an accident.

My kid is in a daycare so they are licensed to wipe and change diapers. Kid is 3.5 and potty trained for a whole. She NEVER poops at school and her poops are like 95% of the time clean with no residue. Shes an oddly fastidious kid. My oldest child on the other hand is the opposite.

Do daycares and preschools have different licensing requirements? I’m pretty certain most daycares will help your child.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think ours helps them wipe. My DD doesn't wipe great and sometimes has a bit of redness. I just keep reminding her to check the toilet paper and keep wiping until it comes back clear.

Oh this would be a recipe for many 3/4 year olds to use up a full roll of toilet paper every time they go. Not saying it's wrong (obviously you want them to learn to clean their butts) but this wouldn't work with most kids because they aren't very physically adept at wiping at this age. So either they'd not reach far enough and be like "oh look, it's clean!" when really they didn't even get to the part that needs wiping, or they'd wipe over and over but because they aren't coordinated enough to do it well, it won't come back fully clean until like the 11th wipe. And now you have a toilet clog, yay.

Yeah, fair. At home I help her wipe and thankfully most of her poops seem to be solid enough there isn't much wiping to do. And if they're not we use wet wipes but I emphasize throwing them in the trash NOT the toilet

It's a liability thing, they're not supposed to. Just keep working with your kid, OP.

Sadly my 5 year old (Pre-K) has this problem too. He's been getting "diaper rash" (he doesn't wear diapers) from it.

His solution is to poop at home where he can use my babywipes. He always throws baby wipes in the trash can. He makes sure to sit on the toilet for at least 5 min in the morning and then after school too.

At a certain age, the daycare staffing ratio and rules do not allow for diapering or assistance with toilet hygiene. It’s not something the teachers are doing to be lazy. It’s part of the state regulations and license requirements.

Anonymous wrote:I don't think ours helps them wipe. My DD doesn't wipe great and sometimes has a bit of redness. I just keep reminding her to check the toilet paper and keep wiping until it comes back clear.

Oh this would be a recipe for many 3/4 year olds to use up a full roll of toilet paper every time they go. Not saying it's wrong (obviously you want them to learn to clean their butts) but this wouldn't work with most kids because they aren't very physically adept at wiping at this age. So either they'd not reach far enough and be like "oh look, it's clean!" when really they didn't even get to the part that needs wiping, or they'd wipe over and over but because they aren't coordinated enough to do it well, it won't come back fully clean until like the 11th wipe. And now you have a toilet clog, yay.

I think this is a regulation thing. If it is a class where they are required to wear underwear, I don't think they can wipe butts.

A few things:

- Is your kid regular? Can you help him get regular? A lot of kids just magically never poop at school -- they poop after school. I have a kid who probably pooped at school maybe 10x between age 3 and 6. I am certain it started with her being wary of using the potty on her own at school after potty training (she'd do it, but she was a reluctant potty trainer anyway) and holding poop to some degree. But eventually it was just her schedule which made it easy.

- Does your kid have "clean poops"? Diet can impact this a lot. If your kid has very sticky poops, maybe look into dietary changes that might help with this, as it will make everyone's life a lot easier for YEARS to come. I wiped butts until age 5, and then you have this transition stage where they do it but they are still not great at it. If their poop comes out clean, it helps a lot with keeping things from getting gross during this phase. Because guess what, 7 year olds are generally not super conscientious about this even though they are physically more capable.

- If your kid isn't bathing nightly, now is the time to start. And also for them to learn about the "quick bath/shower" where they don't necessarily wash hair but they clean all the their dirty bits, including a butt that is not being wiped very well at school.

Anyway, yeah, very few preschools are wiping kids butts, the logistics of this are not reasonable, plus there's a reason they choose to go into preschool age instead of 0-3 where changing diapers/wiping butts is just a part of the job.

I don't think ours helps them wipe. My DD doesn't wipe great and sometimes has a bit of redness. I just keep reminding her to check the toilet paper and keep wiping until it comes back clear.

Yes, our daycare helps kids wipe in the 3-4 classroom.

That is the requirement of potty trained kids in lots of preschools, the ability to wipe themselves.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think there's a difference between daycares and preschools here, both for reasons of licensing/insurance and just culture. My son is in a 3s class at a daycare (young 3s, but all potty trained) and the teacher still wipes - if the kids let her. I think sometimes DS hops off the potty, flushes, and pulls on his clothes without mentioning he pooped as well as peed.

Not sure about other states, but in Maryland it’s the same regs for preschools as it is for daycares.

My kid went to a half day preschool when she was 3 and they had no potty training requirement. Many kids were still in diapers at the beginning of the year. My child didn't consistently use the bathroom until close to 4 and they were patient and supportive with the long process.

Anonymous wrote:I think there's a difference between daycares and preschools here, both for reasons of licensing/insurance and just culture. My son is in a 3s class at a daycare (young 3s, but all potty trained) and the teacher still wipes - if the kids let her. I think sometimes DS hops off the potty, flushes, and pulls on his clothes without mentioning he pooped as well as peed.

Not sure about other states, but in Maryland it’s the same regs for preschools as it is for daycares.