Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate it when people think that having kids means they can never go on vacation again. You can still go on vacation, even to exotic places, with your children!! They actually travel very well when they're tiny and breastfeeding, and you can stick them in a carrier or backpack while wandering a city or hiking or whatever.

Newsflash: A "babymoon" is a romantic vacation that a couple takes to focus on their relationship before the baby arrives and requires large amounts of their attention. Travel with children is not a "babymoon." I'm not opposed to travel with kids, but that is an entirely different type of trip, and not responsive to OP's post.

Newsflash: You're missing the point. I was replying to the people who said "oh we definitely took a babymoon because we're not going to be able to take a vacation again for 18 years".

Anonymous wrote:To the PPs who've traveled extensively with kids:

That's excellent for you. Not everyone can afford extravagant trips once they have children, and not every trip is well-suited to including children. It can take more than organization to keep costs down, depending on where you go.

If you're traveling with a baby, then you don't have to pay for an extra airplane seat or hotel room. Nor do you have to pay for food, if you're nursing. Where are the extra costs, PP?

I have no problem calling it a babymoon because I never had a honeymoon. And frankly who cares what it's called? I don't believe it's "baby industry consumerism". I won't be having a babyshower (nor did I have a bridal shower or party). There's an industry around everything, an advantage to planning early is avoiding rip offs.

And sure, regardless of baby coming we could use a trip....But, when you have other financial needs (IVF was ours), it's difficult to rationalize planning a vacation when you might need more than one cycle and those costs add up. And 11:08 specifically called out my thread. I'm not pregnant enough to plan a vacation?

Many people here seem to suffer from "I did this, look how easy it was". Everyone is different. Everyone has different circumstances. My 2-week European honeymoon / post-latest deployment vacation got spent on IVF. My situation isn't normal, but it also isn't that rare on these boards.

So, I apologize if clicking on my thread annoyed people.

jindc wrote:

Anonymous wrote:11:08 - couldn't agree with you more! Absolutely cringe at the word. I can't believe the whole baby moon thread has gotten so long, especially since it was started by a person who is not even out of their first trimester!!!!!!

I'm sorry I offended you with my 10 1/2 week pregnant self and desire to ensure I'm allowed to take time off work and that my DH's military duty doesn't conflict with the days I'm allowed off in order to us to finally take a vacation, just the two of us, after years of family/friend obligations, wars, and inability to afford being away just the two of us.

Because of that post, I found a site more suited to our interest/price point than where I originally had looked at, so it was very helpful. Especially since many places book up in the high season (same goes for Europe, folks).

Not all of us have unlimited resources to include time off or bosses/jobs that allow us flexibility in time off - if you have such a luxury, you are very fortunate but should understand that many of us do not.

To be fair, I think many of us are responding to the question specifically asked in the title of the thread: "If you had a babymoon/will go on a babymoon, how long were you married/a couple?"

I have no problem with couples taking time to themselves. It sounds like you and your husband could use a trip alone, regardless of baby coming. So, plan your trip! Have a blast! I'm just tired of it all being wrapped up in baby-industry consumerism.

Anonymous wrote:Married 7 years, together for 8.5.

And we didn't know the words babymoon or push present at the time. It made sense to us to do both. We also took a trip before #2. #1 came along and we had a great time picking out cute things for the baby at the little shops. I don't see anything wrong with traveling and recognizing that it will be harder to do with an infant so you plan a big trip right before you have one. By the time our kids were 18 months old, they were traveling, too.

Anonymous wrote:11:08 - couldn't agree with you more! Absolutely cringe at the word. I can't believe the whole baby moon thread has gotten so long, especially since it was started by a person who is not even out of their first trimester!!!!!!

I'm sorry I offended you with my 10 1/2 week pregnant self and desire to ensure I'm allowed to take time off work and that my DH's military duty doesn't conflict with the days I'm allowed off in order to us to finally take a vacation, just the two of us, after years of family/friend obligations, wars, and inability to afford being away just the two of us.

Because of that post, I found a site more suited to our interest/price point than where I originally had looked at, so it was very helpful. Especially since many places book up in the high season (same goes for Europe, folks).

Not all of us have unlimited resources to include time off or bosses/jobs that allow us flexibility in time off - if you have such a luxury, you are very fortunate but should understand that many of us do not.

Married 7 years, together for 8.5.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:11:08 - couldn't agree with you more! Absolutely cringe at the word. I can't believe the whole baby moon thread has gotten so long, especially since it was started by a person who is not even out of their first trimester!!!!!!

I also find it utterly ironic that this forum is full of threads dissecting the minutia of TTC and infertility issues in great detail, indicating a feverish desire to get pregnant, but also this burning need to get your last hurrahs in before the baby comes. Such a bi-polar group of folks.

Oh, FFS. You do realize it's possible both want children and also realize that there are trade-offs that come with having kids, right? Time alone with your partner being one of the major ones. It's not bipolar (and please, enough with the offensive slang), it's being able to have a balanced view of reality and wanting to enjoy some of the aspects of life that will change most dramatically after you have children, while being excited for them all the same.

And to the PP you quoted: why are you so douchey as to criticize someone for being excited to plan her babymoon? The OP of that thread stated clearly that she and her husband need to plan their leave well in advance.

11:38 here - just to clarify I'm NOT talking about this thread. I'm talking about the other 4 page thread on baby moons.

Anonymous wrote:11:08 - couldn't agree with you more! Absolutely cringe at the word. I can't believe the whole baby moon thread has gotten so long, especially since it was started by a person who is not even out of their first trimester!!!!!!

I also find it utterly ironic that this forum is full of threads dissecting the minutia of TTC and infertility issues in great detail, indicating a feverish desire to get pregnant, but also this burning need to get your last hurrahs in before the baby comes. Such a bi-polar group of folks.

11:08 - couldn't agree with you more! Absolutely cringe at the word. I can't believe the whole baby moon thread has gotten so long, especially since it was started by a person who is not even out of their first trimester!!!!!!

Anonymous wrote:We've been together 10 years, married 5, due this summer. We take a beach vacation every April, and we're doing the same this year. Yes, it might be our last trip alone for a while, but I don't see it any differently than the trip we take every other year. Baby or no, it's important for us to be alone, without extended family, away from work and home, at least once a year. Next year it will be a family trip with just the three of us.

I hate "push presents" far more than I hate "babymoons." Both terms can be retired, IMO.

Glad I'm not the only one who feels this way.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate it when people think that having kids means they can never go on vacation again. You can still go on vacation, even to exotic places, with your children!! They actually travel very well when they're tiny and breastfeeding, and you can stick them in a carrier or backpack while wandering a city or hiking or whatever.

True, but it kind of puts the kabash on nightlife.

I found pregnancy put way more of a kabash on nightlife than kids (don't get me wrong, they do not help that aspect!).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate it when people think that having kids means they can never go on vacation again. You can still go on vacation, even to exotic places, with your children!! They actually travel very well when they're tiny and breastfeeding, and you can stick them in a carrier or backpack while wandering a city or hiking or whatever.

True, but it kind of puts the kabash on nightlife.

Oh, because when you're pregnant you're enjoying a rocking good nightlife? Okay. When I was PG I was exhausted and fell asleep on the couch at 8pm every night. I wasn't out still partying it up with my DH and my friends, rocking the clubs and throwing back cocktails.

We've been together 10 years, married 5, due this summer. We take a beach vacation every April, and we're doing the same this year. Yes, it might be our last trip alone for a while, but I don't see it any differently than the trip we take every other year. Baby or no, it's important for us to be alone, without extended family, away from work and home, at least once a year. Next year it will be a family trip with just the three of us.

I hate "push presents" far more than I hate "babymoons." Both terms can be retired, IMO.