Anonymous wrote:OP here. The only people telling me to chill are here on this board. Most people around me, except for the friends going through the same thing right now, have no idea that we are going through the admissions process this year. My point was that I am expressing my stress here on this board so that I DON'T have to talk to anyone else about it IRL, except for DH and one close friend.

OP what grade is your DC in or going to be in?

OP here. The only people telling me to chill are here on this board. Most people around me, except for the friends going through the same thing right now, have no idea that we are going through the admissions process this year. My point was that I am expressing my stress here on this board so that I DON'T have to talk to anyone else about it IRL, except for DH and one close friend.

Mother of 4. 2 in college and 2 in high school.

OP: I assume that this is your first "big ticket" admission and, hopefully, decision. It is understandable that you are stressed.

But keep things in perspective. This single decision does not chart your DC's course in life. You will make thousands of decisions over the course of their lives that will have impact - some of them you choose to make and others you will be forced to make. I have found that a lot anxiety about this issue is pride and fear that someone else does not "share the same opinion" of your child that you do. But this is just ONE decision.

Although I do have to agree with PP on one point. The college waiting process is 100x more agonizing!! IMO, it is because the DC is stressing out too. In K, they do not care either way - its parental stress. In college, you will be managing your stress and your kid's.

GL.

Anonymous wrote:It's not easy to reverse. You have to either go through the admissions process again or put your child in a public school that may be far less than ideal. You have to pull your child out of a place s/he's gotten to know and away from his/her friends. You have to deal with the fact that you just spent $30K per year on something you feel wasn't worth the price.

I'm guessing that those of you calling OP crazy or telling her to relax haven't been though the admissions process recently.

I'm PP and I've done it. I had a child at a "big 3" school that turned out to be a poor fit. I know there are plenty of families in that position that stick it out because of the prestige or whatever, and from what I can see that is a much, much tougher road than transferring to a school that is a better fit. My DC started thriving very quickly after the transfer. Mentally it may seem daunting but it truly isn't and if you are resistant to making necessary changes mid-stream because you've convinced yourself that its too difficult, or that once you make a decision you have to stick with it for some kind of ridiculous reason, you really do your child a disservice.

Unless you have a child with special needs, and I don't get the sense that OP is in that situation, it matters far less than the competitive parents on these boards make it seem. I never called OP crazy. I have been through the process recently. I agree that its stressful, but only as stressful as you allow it to be. OP is so freaked out that everyone around her -- colleagues, family, friends -- are telling her to chill. You don't get the sense she needs to chill?

Here's the "suck it Maret" post:

I am only able to provide insight on rejection and wait list letters from each of the big 3. They were regular business size envelopes. Single page letters. We have gotten: Sidwell rejection, STA waitlist, GDS waitlist, Maret waitlist, we've even received the quite rare Maret rejection. Some think they don't exist but I can assure you that they do. Luckily that kid is now Ivy bound. Suck it Maret.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not easy to reverse. You have to either go through the admissions process again or put your child in a public school that may be far less than ideal. You have to pull your child out of a place s/he's gotten to know and away from his/her friends. You have to deal with the fact that you just spent $30K per year on something you feel wasn't worth the price.

I'm guessing that those of you calling OP crazy or telling her to relax haven't been though the admissions process recently.

And how do you know, this would not happen in your first choice, to-die-for-school? There is no need to stress over K - it will be all right no matter which private school you end up in.

Second PP is absolutely right -- it can and does happen with first-choice schools. There is no pure play here, so don't sweat it. And, while I haven't gone through the private school admissons process in some time, I have gone through the college admissions process 2X in the past 5 years with one more to go. From that perspective, I can tell you that if you're this stressed out over kindergarten, you're heading into a world of train wreck craziness in 12 years. And if that doesn't help, check out the "suck it Maret" poster on the "what does a letter from the Big 3 look life?" thread. At the very least, it'll give you a good laugh.

Please come back and share, OP, what course of medications you ended up on when your child is shut out from your prized choice of school.

You should be stressed, OP. This decision will chart your kid's future. What if you choose wrong? What if your kid doesn't get in anywhere? You can't underestimate how important this is.

Anonymous wrote:Do not calm down, relax or try and stop obsessing.

Figure out where you put the cigar cutter and cigars. Take the boxster out very late tonight when all the traffic has died down, head up to your favorite road, put all the windows down and wind through the gears a few times. Perhaps pull up on one of the overlooks on mulholland (oops, meant the GW, seem to be channeling my youth), and think how short the time is between you stressing about there school, and them stressing about their first job/girl/life.

Obsess all you like. You've earned it. Wallow in it.

Gag. This is a joke, right?

Anonymous wrote:It's not easy to reverse. You have to either go through the admissions process again or put your child in a public school that may be far less than ideal. You have to pull your child out of a place s/he's gotten to know and away from his/her friends. You have to deal with the fact that you just spent $30K per year on something you feel wasn't worth the price.

I'm guessing that those of you calling OP crazy or telling her to relax haven't been though the admissions process recently.

And how do you know, this would not happen in your first choice, to-die-for-school? There is no need to stress over K - it will be all right no matter which private school you end up in.

WOW one of the pp's is freaking out over her kids "K" acceptance???

What the hell are you nutjobs going to be like when your snowflakes dont get into the college YOU want? There are so many stresses in life and this is what you choose to do to yourself and your child.

Find a good therapist now.

It's not easy to reverse. You have to either go through the admissions process again or put your child in a public school that may be far less than ideal. You have to pull your child out of a place s/he's gotten to know and away from his/her friends. You have to deal with the fact that you just spent $30K per year on something you feel wasn't worth the price.

I'm guessing that those of you calling OP crazy or telling her to relax haven't been though the admissions process recently.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She never said it was irreversible! She said it was "possible, not easy, to reverse".
I empathize as I am on pins and needles waiting to hear from K schools and wondering if the letters will arrive Saturday or Monday etc etc and being cautiously optimistic.

And she's wrong. It isn't that difficult to reverse and switch schools and this decision is NOT do or die.

Uh, yes it is.

Because?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She never said it was irreversible! She said it was "possible, not easy, to reverse".
I empathize as I am on pins and needles waiting to hear from K schools and wondering if the letters will arrive Saturday or Monday etc etc and being cautiously optimistic.

And she's wrong. It isn't that difficult to reverse and switch schools and this decision is NOT do or die.

Uh, yes it is.

Anonymous wrote:She never said it was irreversible! She said it was "possible, not easy, to reverse".
I empathize as I am on pins and needles waiting to hear from K schools and wondering if the letters will arrive Saturday or Monday etc etc and being cautiously optimistic.

And she's wrong. It isn't that difficult to reverse and switch schools and this decision is NOT do or die.