I have kindergarten twins and we do one per week per kid. There are parents who do more and many that do none at all with school friends.

Basically there's a huge range and it varies by class, by family, by school, etc. My daughter is in a class this year where 75% of the girls' families do no play dates. The parents all work full time and never come to any school events. They're just quieter people who keep to themselves. Last year, the girls' parents in her class were largely social butterflies so we all got our kids together frequently (and still do to some extent).

I have kindergarten twins and we do one per week per kid. There are parents who do more and many that do none at all with school friends.

Basically there's a huge range and it varies by class, by family, by school, etc. My daughter is in a class this year where 75% of the girls' families do no play dates. The parents all work full time and never come to any school events. They're just quieter people who keep to themselves. Last year, the girls' parents in her class were largely social butterflies so we all got our kids together frequently (and still do to some extent).

We try to have at least once a week but with DC' extracurricular activities it can be pretty hard. Besides, I'd rather spend our weekends as a family and not with school friends.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My K-er is rarely invited for play dates. I don't really care though because I'm insanely busy and we just don't have the time. Older DC is invited all the time but I never reciprocate and I explain each time that I'm asked that I just can't make it work. I've hosted play dates maybe 8 times in he last four years. Between work, after school activities, weekend activities, etc... I'm overwhelmed. We don't have sitters or nannies and my DH and I both work like dogs. Play date shmay date.

You have a lot of "I" statements.

"I" sure do because "I" need to preserve my sanity. "My" children have plenty of friends and they are very social but "I" am not willing to run myself ragged all for the sake of pretending that playdates will make a huge big difference in whether or not my children are happy and well adjusted. "I" don't measure my children's worth by the number of playdates or friends that they have. "I've" overheard tons of idiot parents gloat about how popular their children are because they get invited on so many playdates. "I" think it is a vapid and stupid measure of your DC's childhood; especially when "I'd" much prefer to spend quality time at home with "my" family (when we get some very rare downtime).

Anonymous wrote:My K-er is rarely invited for play dates. I don't really care though because I'm insanely busy and we just don't have the time. Older DC is invited all the time but I never reciprocate and I explain each time that I'm asked that I just can't make it work. I've hosted play dates maybe 8 times in he last four years. Between work, after school activities, weekend activities, etc... I'm overwhelmed. We don't have sitters or nannies and my DH and I both work like dogs. Play date shmay date.

You have a lot of "I" statements.

We do 1-2 a month and reciprocate.

My K-er is rarely invited for play dates. I don't really care though because I'm insanely busy and we just don't have the time. Older DC is invited all the time but I never reciprocate and I explain each time that I'm asked that I just can't make it work. I've hosted play dates maybe 8 times in he last four years. Between work, after school activities, weekend activities, etc... I'm overwhelmed. We don't have sitters or nannies and my DH and I both work like dogs. Play date shmay date.

Rarely during the week but regularly on the weekend. Pretty much every Saturday and maybe half of the Sundays. Sometimes we do a progressive playdate so both sets of parents get some free time. And sometimes we do a big playdate with multiple children that is really an excuse for parents to get together. Most playdates are with classmates or friends from our old daycare who live in our neighborhood.

I do most of the play dates..most moms at our school work and I think it makes it easier for them and I am happy to play this role. My advice..set up the play dates and don't worry about who is asking you..it will drive you crazy. If your kid is having fun..all that matters!

We usually have two or three a week. Two are with kids who go to different schools. One is usually with a kid from ds's class. FWIW, I am a SAHM and the other moms work. I never care about reciprocity! I know they are busy and have weekend family time.

Is this a public vs. private thing?

I'm surprised at how few playdates your kids go on.

My DC is in public kindergarten and I have to limit her to two playdates during the school week, b/c I think more is excessive and we have to fit other things in.

Yeah, all the time. I feel like a social secretary. We stick to weekends, though, except for his very best friends.

We end up with multiple invitations every weekend. If I'm extending the initial invitation and someone else calls to invite DD over, I'll just invite the child to join in.

"hard" not had...sorry for typos...

My youngest has 2 older siblings and I LOVE it when he is invited to friend's homes, but it is very had for me to reciprocate because I am shuttling the older ones around to activities after school. I have been at home this year, but will soon be returning to work full time, and then it will become even harder. When my oldest was young, I was always happy to host and didn't worry about reciprocity. I guess this is my way of saying, don't take it personally if your child isn't invited back. Life can get complicated.