Anonymous
Post 01/23/2013 11:53     Subject: Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
OP, I just want to say that I am proud of you for reaching out to get counseling help. You deserve that. And your stupid wife should pay the co-pays.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2013 11:49     Subject: Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
Anonymous wrote:These charge on a sliding scale.

The Behavior Therapy Center of Greater Washington
White Oak Professional Park
11227 Lockwood Drive, Silver Spring, MD
[Metro: Silver Spring, plus a Metrobus ride]
301.593.4040
http://www.behaviortherapycenter.com

The Center Clinic
(Affiliated with the George Washington University)
2300 M Street NW Suite 910 [No Metro train station nearby]
202.994.4937
http://www.gwu.edu/~cclinic/

Community Counseling Services Center
(Also affiliated with the George Washington University)
2134 G Street NW Room B11 [Metro: Foggy Bottom]
202.994.8645
http://neighborhood.gwu.edu/discovergw/communitycounsel.cfm

The Eugene Meyer III Treatment Center
(The Washington School of Psychiatry’s Outpatient Clinic)
5028 Wisconsin Avenue NW [Metro: Friendship Heights]
202.537.6050
http://www.wspdc.org/mTC.htm

The Women’s Center– DC and Vienna, VA
(Individuals & Couples -- Men are welcome, too)
1025 Vermont Avenue NW [Metro: McPherson Square]
202.293.4580
133 Park Street NE, Vienna, VA 22180 [No Metro nearby]
703.281.2657
http://www.thewomenscenter.org/


OP Here.
Thank you for going to the trouble of compiling this list for me. I appreciate it. I'm looking at these places as they may be cheaper than my insurance copays in the long run.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2013 11:49     Subject: Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
Anonymous wrote:OP, whether you marriage can be saved or not nobody knows. But be good to yourself-exercise, sleep, and eat well. No matter what your wife is, you're still somebody's dad.


Agreed. And given your wife's obvious and very serious character flaws, that child is going to need you more than ever to the be the stable and dependable one. Don't let your love for your child be chipped away because of this.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2013 11:47     Subject: Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Churches have counseling groups so this might not be a bad way to go for more support. Another marriage problem facilitated by Facebook......where the past never completely goes away.


Yup. Facebook has already broken up 4 of my friends marriages. In all four cases, the wives left them to be with ex-high school or college boyfriends.


I just do not get this. I would never, ever reconnect with any of the guys I dated in HS and college. There were good reasons we broke up and I never think about them or expect them to be better/different. This is just lame beyond belief.

OP, I've no suggestions to add to the above other than to say I am sorry this is happening to you. It must suck knowing that your wife has so very little respect for you. I don't blame you for being angry and hurt. I hope your wife is reeling and will realize the extent of her flaws and her betrayal and be able to change for the sake of your family.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2013 11:41     Subject: Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Churches have counseling groups so this might not be a bad way to go for more support. Another marriage problem facilitated by Facebook......where the past never completely goes away.


Yup. Facebook has already broken up 4 of my friends marriages. In all four cases, the wives left them to be with ex-high school or college boyfriends.


OP Here.
Same here. We had plenty of mutual friends who broke up because of Facebook. The funny thing is that she and I used to talk about that very thing and had a "no exes" policy when it came to FB friends. It was her idea, not mine. Apparently she went back on it a long time ago because she's friends with all of them now.


Facebook does not create cheaters, it facilitates cheating. You are a click sway from contacting someone for which you had feelings. When in the course of history has a tool like that been out there that has this ability?
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2013 11:35     Subject: Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
OP, whether you marriage can be saved or not nobody knows. But be good to yourself-exercise, sleep, and eat well. No matter what your wife is, you're still somebody's dad.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2013 11:33     Subject: Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Churches have counseling groups so this might not be a bad way to go for more support. Another marriage problem facilitated by Facebook......where the past never completely goes away.


Yup. Facebook has already broken up 4 of my friends marriages. In all four cases, the wives left them to be with ex-high school or college boyfriends.


OP Here.
Same here. We had plenty of mutual friends who broke up because of Facebook. The funny thing is that she and I used to talk about that very thing and had a "no exes" policy when it came to FB friends. It was her idea, not mine. Apparently she went back on it a long time ago because she's friends with all of them now.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2013 11:30     Subject: Re:Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
Anonymous wrote:You need to be in joint counseling now. stat. Do you have health insurance? can you find someone who takes your insurance? if not, do you have a faith? someone of the clergy you can go to jointly? You probably should see someone on your own too--perhaps someone else on this board can help you with that, but what strikes me is that your wife is still 'trying to be friends' with this guy. If she wants to save the marriage, she has to cut off all contact ASAP, you need to explore things in counseling together and she needs to figure out why this fantasy/escape is so powerful to her.

I'm so sorry. So painful. Maybe this will lead to some serious discussions and change in your marriage so that it will ultimately be strengthened but not without a lot of painful work. Also, can you take a day or two off from your child, have your wife stay home? Maybe a little time on your own would be helpful. see a friend, family, etc.


OP Here.

She wants to go to couples therapy, but I first need to figure out if I even want to continue a relationship with her. That's why I'm looking for individual counseling. I checked with my insurance and they will cover the visits. I was surprised because I used to work for Blue Cross in another state and we didn't cover couple's therapy or marriage counseling. We only offered a 20% discount on approved providers, so I assumed it was like that across the board.

Now she says she'll cut off contact with him even though she'll "always love him, but isn't in love with him." I don't believe you can be ready to leave your family Saturday morning and three days later have a complete change of heart, but I guess that's what the therapy is for. She may take a few days off, but I don't really have anywhere to go if she did.
Anonymous
Post 01/23/2013 11:22     Subject: Re:Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
Anonymous wrote:So, so sorry OP. Do not leave the home. Stay with your daughter.

You may find some good advice from other husbands who have been in your situation at www.survivinginfidelity.com

If you can't get to counseling right away, at least you will find some help on the forums on that site.


OP Here.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!
I normally detest self help and "support groups," and always felt like I could handle stuff on my own, but in this situation I needed something and when I wrote this yesterday I felt like I was losing my mind. I spent the rest of the day on that site and it helped SO MUCH! Of course, I'm not "whole" but my emotions feel manageable (at least right now). So thank you again.
Anonymous
Post 01/22/2013 23:28     Subject: Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
I am so sorry OP. The worst thing about this is that she was willing to leave your child. What kind of woman abandons their child?

I hope that you get all the help you need. You can survive this.
Anonymous
Post 01/22/2013 22:43     Subject: Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
Women's center and meltzer clinic at GW.
Anonymous
Post 01/22/2013 22:40     Subject: Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
These charge on a sliding scale.

The Behavior Therapy Center of Greater Washington
White Oak Professional Park
11227 Lockwood Drive, Silver Spring, MD
[Metro: Silver Spring, plus a Metrobus ride]
301.593.4040
http://www.behaviortherapycenter.com

The Center Clinic
(Affiliated with the George Washington University)
2300 M Street NW Suite 910 [No Metro train station nearby]
202.994.4937
http://www.gwu.edu/~cclinic/

Community Counseling Services Center
(Also affiliated with the George Washington University)
2134 G Street NW Room B11 [Metro: Foggy Bottom]
202.994.8645
http://neighborhood.gwu.edu/discovergw/communitycounsel.cfm

The Eugene Meyer III Treatment Center
(The Washington School of Psychiatry’s Outpatient Clinic)
5028 Wisconsin Avenue NW [Metro: Friendship Heights]
202.537.6050
http://www.wspdc.org/mTC.htm

The Women’s Center– DC and Vienna, VA
(Individuals & Couples -- Men are welcome, too)
1025 Vermont Avenue NW [Metro: McPherson Square]
202.293.4580
133 Park Street NE, Vienna, VA 22180 [No Metro nearby]
703.281.2657
http://www.thewomenscenter.org/
Anonymous
Post 01/22/2013 22:38     Subject: Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
I am sorry OP. Check out the surviving infidelity website. There is a Just Found Out section with many people who can relate to your situation. sometimes it is good to know you aren't alone even though it doesn't change the pain you feel.

Your wife definitely only wanted back because he said no. The fact she denied that shows she still isn't willing to be honest. She is still in lala land.

Take care of yourself. eat, sleep, drink (water).
Anonymous
Post 01/22/2013 22:10     Subject: Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
Anonymous wrote:OP, not sure where you work, but many employers have confidential employee assistance programs that provide referrals for short-term counseling. Might this be an option for you?


Op is a stay at home dad.
Anonymous
Post 01/22/2013 20:49     Subject: Wife is cheating. I need free or deeply discounted therapy. Please help.
The experiences of this OP are indicative of how selfish an affair can be. If you are unhappy in your marriage, get out. But don't break another person's spirit and and have them feel like inadequate crap. What gives you the right to do this to another person who exchanged vows with you? How selfish can a person be?