Anonymous wrote:OP, if you're going to get shit from the church authorities if your ex doesn't show up ... maybe you need a new church home.

Oh please!

OP is saying it is the norm (as it should be) that both parents attend. It will be obvious to her son that his father chose not to come even if he doesn't say anything about it.

What you tell him is not so important. He's going to have to make is peace with his father being an a-hole.

Lots of great strong men grow up without having the dad they deserve. Just one of life's curve balls is all.

I understand why you are upset but just let it flow. I think your boy will be just fine.

OP, if you're going to get shit from the church authorities if your ex doesn't show up ... maybe you need a new church home.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. His godparents will be there so maybe they can come up with us too.

I think that's a great plan, OP. Good luck.

OP here. His godparents will be there so maybe they can come up with us too.

Is there a grandfather or uncle or special male in his life who can be there?

I would say, "Daddy couldn't come. I don't know why, but next time you talk to him, you can ask him. It's okay to be sad or angry or not feel anything at all about it. Whatever you feel is okay, and it's okay if your feelings about it change."

Anonymous wrote:I don't see first communion as worth a plane ticket.

My ex must have written this. That is just like saying your child isn't worth your time or money.

Anonymous wrote:No, it is a First Communion. The thing is, my church expects both parents to be there. Not an unreasonable expectation really.

I didn't read everything but is there a male figure in his lite that could stand in? A family friend or uncle?

I don't see first communion as worth a plane ticket.

No, it is a First Communion. The thing is, my church expects both parents to be there. Not an unreasonable expectation really.

Is this baptism? Are you LDS? Talk to your bishop. He will help....

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the OP. I am sure I will have to do the explaining as his father rarely calls and I am sure he won't answer my call after the event is over. My own father was just like this so I know the feelings my son will have as he gets older. I will try to be as matter of fact about it as I can.

Well, it obviously didn't bother you so much since you married your father. Why not get him into counseling so he can make better life decisions that you did?

Bitch

Yes, we were married.

Anonymous wrote:There are a fair number of men who have remarried, have infants or toddlers, and don't stay connected with the first set of children. Same as 30 years ago. So he won't be the only one. And this will come up again and again. He'll get used to it, but should talk about it a bit.

Im sorry, but how sad is that? What an awful thing for a little boy to have to "get used to."

OP, you didn't say but were you ever married to this man? Was a divorce involved?