I am Mormon and feel tremendous pressure to "give" 10%. It is tracked and every member called in for a tithing settlement each December to make sure we're in good standing.

If you do not pay tithing, you can't enter the temple. Huge reprucussions if you need to attend a family member's temple wedding. I almost did not get to attend my sisters wedding one year until I could come up with another $3,000 to reach the status of full-tithe payer. I could've lied and still gotten in, but that is not who I am.

OP here - I'm generic Christian, but my husband comes from a more fundamentalist background (we're both very liberal now, but I guess the 10% thing was hammered into him). I'm finding some interesting stuff about how "tithing" as its commonly referred to today (i.e. 10%) came about in the church in the eighteenth century, and giving 10% of your earnings is not actually biblical in the sense that the Bible doesn't specifically command this. 10% just seemed like a good starting place, I guess, but we'll be reassessing. Thanks!

Yes we do tithe as we pay off debt.
Do what you can and ask the Lord to lead as you grow in faith to increase your tithing amount to the full 10% if that is what you endeavour to do.

Anonymous wrote:I grew up Catholic and still go to church. I never feel pressured to add to the donation basket and usually I let my son throw in a dollar or two. 10%?? What religion are you OP?

Probably Christian. My SIL is Southern Baptist and devoutly tithes. I'll never forget- I was at her house one weekend and she and my MIL got in a huge fight because SIL and BIL were behind on their ($600/month with only 10 years to go) mortgage and the bank had sent them a letter saying they were beginning foreclosure procedures. And on the fridge was a check written out to their church for 10% of what her husband brought home that week.

I grew up Catholic and still go to church. I never feel pressured to add to the donation basket and usually I let my son throw in a dollar or two. 10%?? What religion are you OP?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nope! We don't give anything except on Easter and Christmas.

Agree. I refuse to give on a regular basis because, despite my love of being Catholic, I hold a strong moral objection to the Church's incredible legal bills brought about by the monsters who preyed on children for so many years, and their continued insistence on handling this issue poorly. So you get no cash from me.

I volunteer my time when able, and donate concrete goods to specific charity. Tithing is a crock. God doesn't care about money.

+1
I go to church to worship. I do not care if there's a new million dollar sound system installed and I'm not going to break my back to pay for it.

I know this is something to take up with individual parishes, but I always get annoyed that the lights are ALWAYS ON in church, even in broad daylight! I'm just thinking how "Heck, I'm not paying that electric bill!!"

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nope! We don't give anything except on Easter and Christmas.

Agree. I refuse to give on a regular basis because, despite my love of being Catholic, I hold a strong moral objection to the Church's incredible legal bills brought about by the monsters who preyed on children for so many years, and their continued insistence on handling this issue poorly. So you get no cash from me.

I volunteer my time when able, and donate concrete goods to specific charity. Tithing is a crock. God doesn't care about money.

+1
I go to church to worship. I do not care if there's a new million dollar sound system installed and I'm not going to break my back to pay for it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I believe if you find it in your family's budget to tithe, the Lord will provide you even more.

And I believe that if you leave your bills under your pillow at night, the Bill Fairy (little-known cousin to the Tooth Fairy) will pay it for you!

That's the great thing about faith...we each have our own and get to believe what we want to believe.

And I've been pretty darn blessed thus far. Here's hoping you are as well!

Anonymous wrote:Nope! We don't give anything except on Easter and Christmas.

Agree. I refuse to give on a regular basis because, despite my love of being Catholic, I hold a strong moral objection to the Church's incredible legal bills brought about by the monsters who preyed on children for so many years, and their continued insistence on handling this issue poorly. So you get no cash from me.

I volunteer my time when able, and donate concrete goods to specific charity. Tithing is a crock. God doesn't care about money.

This is one of the reasons we've never joined a church. It is too expensive. We give to the charities we pick and we give in the amounts we can afford. I do not think it makes you a better Christian to give 10% of your income to a church.

Anonymous wrote:Honestly op, you ,ake a lot of money. Tithing shouldn't be that huge of a burden, imo. You need to talk to a planner, or even just spend some time reading/listening to dave ramsey or suze orman. Get rid of at least one car, get a klunker or take metro, whatever. Get cheaper housing. There are ways you can downsize your budget and things like food are negotiable. Negotiate exactly what you buy...avoid prepackaged processed stuff to save money. Consider an organic delivery service to keep you out of the store and to bring you fresh healthy foods. Downsize you cell plan to something cheaper...look into virgin mobile or if you seldom use the phone get some cheap throw away phone. Get rid of cable and use netflux or hulu for less than $10/mo. Call around for insurance quotes to see if you can lower that cost. But i think you can probably tithe and still make it. And rememver malachi 3:10. If you pay it, God will help you.

OP here. Malachi 3 is not directed at the common person, but the priests of Israel and sons of Levi. Plus, it is OT law. I have taken a Dave Ramsey course, we have only one car, metro is inaccessible, can't afford to move (we own). No cable. Life insurance is $65/month, through a carrier recommended by Dave Ramsey, which is pretty reasonable. We don't buy a lot of pre-packaged, but also don't buy much organic. We can make it, just can't get ahead.

Anonymous wrote:I believe you should give 10% of your take home after living expenses

OP here - I think we're going to try something like this. I'm thinking 10% on takehome-minus-debt. That way it can increase as we knock off our debt.

Honestly op, you ,ake a lot of money. Tithing shouldn't be that huge of a burden, imo. You need to talk to a planner, or even just spend some time reading/listening to dave ramsey or suze orman. Get rid of at least one car, get a klunker or take metro, whatever. Get cheaper housing. There are ways you can downsize your budget and things like food are negotiable. Negotiate exactly what you buy...avoid prepackaged processed stuff to save money. Consider an organic delivery service to keep you out of the store and to bring you fresh healthy foods. Downsize you cell plan to something cheaper...look into virgin mobile or if you seldom use the phone get some cheap throw away phone. Get rid of cable and use netflux or hulu for less than $10/mo. Call around for insurance quotes to see if you can lower that cost. But i think you can probably tithe and still make it. And rememver malachi 3:10. If you pay it, God will help you.

OP here. Do you live in DC 15:11? I am also amazed at the amount of money we earn and burn through, but it is what it is. We can "survive" on $8100, but can't get ahead. A very rough budget for us:

$3200 - house/utilities/life insurance
$2000 - childcare
$1800 - student loans, credit card debt, car payment/insurance/gas/parking (minimum payments on all)
$800 - food/household goods like TP, paper towel, laundry detergent, etc
$900 - tithe

That leaves a grand total of $300 for all extras - clothing, diapers, toiletries, haircuts, etc. Survivable? Sure. Manageable? Yes. But very difficult to save extra. The first three big ticket items are fixed costs - we cannot reduce them by cutting corners, etc.

We are obviously house-poor. I know that is the problem, but moving is not an option right now.

Anyway - not the point of my post, but just wanted to show that it's possible for $9,000 (or $8,100) to not stretch all that far.

Thanks to everyone for your input and feedback - we'll be examining our budget again this week.

I believe you should give 10% of your take home after living expenses