Anonymous wrote:

Wow. I guess I have a lot to learn, then. I would never deny a request to borrow my pen if it was going to be used to quickly sign a form, right next to me, by someone who was not going anywhere (because in line at customs).

I probably never would deny that kind of request either because I wouldn't have a pen on me that I would be worried about losing or breaking. But I do have a Waterman fountain pen that means a lot to me that I would not lend, even for a few minutes standing in line. You just never know what could happen. And I think that's the big thing people are trying to say...the man said the pen was important to him, and that should be enough for the other person (or anyone listening in) to accept the answer graciously.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again - even if you think I was an asshole for saying something to the man, do you think that the man was being a bit of one, too, in not allowing someone to borrow his pen under those circumstances?

No, as PPs have already explained--it's ok to politely decline. it doesn't make you an asshole, under these or any circumstances.

Wow. I guess I have a lot to learn, then. I would never deny a request to borrow my pen if it was going to be used to quickly sign a form, right next to me, by someone who was not going anywhere (because in line at customs).

I appreciate the honesty of your responses.

Well that's fine. Would I lend someone my pen? Sure. But I certainly wouldn't berate someone for not lending out a pen, FFS. At most I would internally roll my eyes.

OP, you must go through the day exhausted if you get so morally outraged about minor incidents.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again - even if you think I was an asshole for saying something to the man, do you think that the man was being a bit of one, too, in not allowing someone to borrow his pen under those circumstances?

This was not a life or death situation, OP. Perhaps he was inconveniencing the people who asked for the pen. He was being a bit inflexible, sure. But has been pointed out multiple times in this thread, it is his perogative to politely decline. Why in the world would that make him an "asshole"? You are weird, OP.

I didn't say it made him an asshole. I did say that I thought it was an asshole-ish thing to do. (Yes yes, I get that everyone thinks that he wasn't acting like an asshole, and that I'm the asshole, and weird, etc. so you don't have to post that again.)

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again - even if you think I was an asshole for saying something to the man, do you think that the man was being a bit of one, too, in not allowing someone to borrow his pen under those circumstances?

No, as PPs have already explained--it's ok to politely decline. it doesn't make you an asshole, under these or any circumstances.

Wow. I guess I have a lot to learn, then. I would never deny a request to borrow my pen if it was going to be used to quickly sign a form, right next to me, by someone who was not going anywhere (because in line at customs).

I appreciate the honesty of your responses.

That is fine -- but you seem to expect everyone to behave just like you do... otherwise they are assholes.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Even if it was an expensive pen, did he really think that the young men were going to break it during their 2 minutes of use while standing right next to the pen-owner?

Does it matter?

What if the borrower had dropped the pen on the floor, and a few of the jewels had broken off and rolled into a vent? Who was going to pay for that?

Or what if he was a spy, and using the pen meant getting injected with lethal poison? Should he still have given it to them?

Ha! This is truly fresh perpective!

OP, you know what that say? You should only lend stuff that you don't care to see ever again. Personally, I don't own any pens that are of any significant value, monetary or otherwise, but some people do, and it is their right to safeguard their possessions. Nothing wrong with that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here again - even if you think I was an asshole for saying something to the man, do you think that the man was being a bit of one, too, in not allowing someone to borrow his pen under those circumstances?

No, as PPs have already explained--it's ok to politely decline. it doesn't make you an asshole, under these or any circumstances.

Wow. I guess I have a lot to learn, then. I would never deny a request to borrow my pen if it was going to be used to quickly sign a form, right next to me, by someone who was not going anywhere (because in line at customs).

I appreciate the honesty of your responses.

Anonymous wrote:OP here again - even if you think I was an asshole for saying something to the man, do you think that the man was being a bit of one, too, in not allowing someone to borrow his pen under those circumstances?

This was not a life or death situation, OP. Perhaps he was inconveniencing the people who asked for the pen. He was being a bit inflexible, sure. But has been pointed out multiple times in this thread, it is his perogative to politely decline. Why in the world would that make him an "asshole"? You are weird, OP.

Anonymous wrote:Even if it was an expensive pen, did he really think that the young men were going to break it during their 2 minutes of use while standing right next to the pen-owner?

Does it matter?

What if the borrower had dropped the pen on the floor, and a few of the jewels had broken off and rolled into a vent? Who was going to pay for that?

Or what if he was a spy, and using the pen meant getting injected with lethal poison? Should he still have given it to them?

Anonymous wrote:OP here again - even if you think I was an asshole for saying something to the man, do you think that the man was being a bit of one, too, in not allowing someone to borrow his pen under those circumstances?

I guess someone needs to spell it out for you.

N-O

The man politely refused to lend his property to someone else. We do have the right to say no to requests, and it does not make us assholes if we're polite.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It absolutely was asshole-ish what you did, OP. Actually, no "ish" about it - you acted like an asshole.

Wait, that's not what you meant? Urk. Make that clueless asshole.

Okay, thanks, I get it, no need to be so hostile.

No, OP, you don't get it. You posted a second time in this thread to try to get us to agree with you.

Anonymous wrote:OP here again - even if you think I was an asshole for saying something to the man, do you think that the man was being a bit of one, too, in not allowing someone to borrow his pen under those circumstances?

No, as PPs have already explained--it's ok to politely decline. it doesn't make you an asshole, under these or any circumstances.

Anonymous wrote:If it was a Montblanc pen, he could have easily spent several hundred dollars on it. You were the asshole, OP. Not him.

http://www.montblanc.com/

Wanted to add: I used to regularly lend out pencils with my name on them in high school. Theoretically, those fellow students were also 'right there' to give me the pencils back. Never happened. For at least 2 years after I graduated high school, there were still pencils floating around with my name on them.

Anonymous wrote:Even if it was an expensive pen, did he really think that the young men were going to break it during their 2 minutes of use while standing right next to the pen-owner?

It doesn't matter. It's the pen-owner's right to say no, especially if he was polite. I had a friend ask to borrow my double stroller. I said no, with no explanation. I don't owe her the use of my stroller, or even any explanation.

Anonymous wrote:OP here again - even if you think I was an asshole for saying something to the man, do you think that the man was being a bit of one, too, in not allowing someone to borrow his pen under those circumstances?

No, I don't. It is a personal choice and he made a decision. You need to realize your behavior was inappropriate and you made an ass of yourself. Maybe it is time to evaluate how you deal with people?

Anonymous wrote:It absolutely was asshole-ish what you did, OP. Actually, no "ish" about it - you acted like an asshole.

Wait, that's not what you meant? Urk. Make that clueless asshole.

Okay, thanks, I get it, no need to be so hostile.