Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 13:57     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Please share your tips to save money.

I SAH with our 2 children. DC1 is starting school in the fall 4 mornings per week. We rent in the suburbs.

After 10 years with this company DH finally had enough. He is tired of the way they're treating him (they complain when he asks for sick days - never had to before we had kids but now it's more frequent) they're not family friendly at all, no respect for his career (his salary is 30% lower than market average, no respect for his personal time (gets calls at all hours at night and over the weekend where he had to loging to fix stuff) it got to the point that he said he could not do something his manager yelled saying "get your wife to drive so you can join us" talking about a conference call happening during his vacation. We were driving cross country and DH was driving when he got this call.

Anyway, we have no debt. Our monthly bills are rent, health insurance, groceries, gas, utilities and now DC's school. I just got a deal with our cable service so we're paying 50% less there.

DH's company pays for phone and half of our health insurance so we're waiting to see how this will work during his break.

What are your tips?


Why is DH taking more frequent sick days now that you have kids? You SAH, so it's not like they are picking up daycare germs. I WAH and I've had to take sick leave ONCE for my toddler (she had roseola). Since she's at home with a nanny she doesn't bring home germs, and neither of us (or DH) get sick.

Honestly, someone being paid 30% under market is probably performing 30% under market. There's no reason a stellar employee wouldn't move in 10 years. There's also no reason that the breadwinner in a family should leave a job when the complaints are relatively minor (really? I've been asked to take a conference call while driving to vacation, and switched with DH. How is this an issue?) unless the breadwinner has another job lined up. The economy is bad. You and your DH need to get real about whether he has performance issues that are holding him back, or whether he should leave when he provides your only means of living.


Dr. Phil is in the house people! It's time to get real! OP -- what you say?
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 13:54     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

Anonymous wrote:Please share your tips to save money.

I SAH with our 2 children. DC1 is starting school in the fall 4 mornings per week. We rent in the suburbs.

After 10 years with this company DH finally had enough. He is tired of the way they're treating him (they complain when he asks for sick days - never had to before we had kids but now it's more frequent) they're not family friendly at all, no respect for his career (his salary is 30% lower than market average, no respect for his personal time (gets calls at all hours at night and over the weekend where he had to loging to fix stuff) it got to the point that he said he could not do something his manager yelled saying "get your wife to drive so you can join us" talking about a conference call happening during his vacation. We were driving cross country and DH was driving when he got this call.

Anyway, we have no debt. Our monthly bills are rent, health insurance, groceries, gas, utilities and now DC's school. I just got a deal with our cable service so we're paying 50% less there.

DH's company pays for phone and half of our health insurance so we're waiting to see how this will work during his break.

What are your tips?


Why is DH taking more frequent sick days now that you have kids? You SAH, so it's not like they are picking up daycare germs. I WAH and I've had to take sick leave ONCE for my toddler (she had roseola). Since she's at home with a nanny she doesn't bring home germs, and neither of us (or DH) get sick.

Honestly, someone being paid 30% under market is probably performing 30% under market. There's no reason a stellar employee wouldn't move in 10 years. There's also no reason that the breadwinner in a family should leave a job when the complaints are relatively minor (really? I've been asked to take a conference call while driving to vacation, and switched with DH. How is this an issue?) unless the breadwinner has another job lined up. The economy is bad. You and your DH need to get real about whether he has performance issues that are holding him back, or whether he should leave when he provides your only means of living.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 13:23     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

It's chipotle lady. period.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 13:21     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

Anonymous wrote:Well, but she's probably thinking the same thing I am, which is that OP sounds like a bit of a princess, is being unrealistic, and should get off her butt and get herself a job. (NP here, btw)


You may have missed that this is not an easy thing to do these days...
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 13:20     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

Well, but she's probably thinking the same thing I am, which is that OP sounds like a bit of a princess, is being unrealistic, and should get off her butt and get herself a job. (NP here, btw)
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 13:17     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

I second PP -- totally uncool to make this more personal and put in those unhelpful, judgmental remarks.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 13:16     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

Anonymous wrote:OP, I know you.
Therefore no advice, but sympathy.



Tell us more! I'm home today (new job starts next wed) and am bored out of my mind! I need something gossipy.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 13:15     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

Hey-- PPs who *may* know OP-- enough with the personal details and especially the "just get your act together". Not cool.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 13:14     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP, I know you.
Therefore no advice, but sympathy.


I agree. If your DH has quit his job, and won't even be looking for work for another four months, your just turned two-year-old does not need to go to that special montessori school 4 days a week. No matter how rough it is at home with the four-month old. Paying this tuition is going to bit you in the butt. You are going to need that savings! We all know now that you spend too much time on DCUM. Just get your act together. You can do this.


What is going on in this thread?
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 13:11     Subject: Re:DH is taking unpaid vacation

Sounds like he is on furlough. Lots of those going around in this economy.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 12:50     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

Anonymous wrote:OP, I know you.
Therefore no advice, but sympathy.


I agree. If your DH has quit his job, and won't even be looking for work for another four months, your just turned two-year-old does not need to go to that special montessori school 4 days a week. No matter how rough it is at home with the four-month old. Paying this tuition is going to bit you in the butt. You are going to need that savings! We all know now that you spend too much time on DCUM. Just get your act together. You can do this.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 12:20     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

Anonymous wrote:Have your husband meet with a recruiter that speicalizes in his field and go from there. Yes, it's a tough job market, but companies are always looking for hard working people. From the sound of your post seems like your DH specializes in IT. Tons of jobs out there!


I agree. It is always difficult to find hard workers.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 12:15     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

OP, I know you.
Therefore no advice, but sympathy.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 12:02     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

How old is DC1? You can probably forgo preschool this year in lieu of free programs at the library, community center, book store, toy store, etc.
Anonymous
Post 08/27/2012 11:47     Subject: DH is taking unpaid vacation

Your DH is taking unpaid vacation b/c he's used up all his vacation, sick and personal days? If so, he sounds depressed which isn't surprising b/c his work sucks. If he has to take unpaid leave - he's already missed a lot of work and he will get fired. He really needs to be looking for a new job. You should be too. Sorry.