Anonymous wrote:If you are happy, your kids will be happy.

Nope, mine did not thrive after divorce.

But ARE you happy? Or are you just as miserable now as you were when you were married to the jerk?

Time heals all wounds.

Anonymous wrote:The power of positive thinking. Sometimes the world is depressing and negative things happen. Better to face them than focus so much on telling a positive story and feel the constant strain of cognitive dissonance.

+1

Totally agree that "self esteem" and being focused on building it all the time isn't the answer to most problems.

The best reasoning on this, I heard on this one time on Oprah has stayed with me for almost 20 years, and it's something like, "go ahead and look at yourself and ask yourself, what are the things I have low self-esteem about? And you know what, there might actually be some valid things. What can you change?". That's what people should ask themselves, and not just blindly feel that they are more awesome than they reallly are.

"tell the universe what you want and it will give it to you."

Damn The Secret... it's turning everyone into nutjobs...

Protecting the Gift/The Gift of Fear. Any adult male who is kind to your child or shows a glimmer of friendliness is a child molester, and "your gut" will guide you to believe that your neighbors are sociopaths, murderers, and evil people.

Anonymous wrote:The Rules.

The Rule are excellent.

The higher the self-esteem the better (i.e. happier, more successful adult).

The power of positive thinking. Sometimes the world is depressing and negative things happen. Better to face them than focus so much on telling a positive story and feel the constant strain of cognitive dissonance.

Anonymous wrote:The Rules.

I read that book for giggles and there were a few things I agreed with. Dating isn't therapy. Once you become very close it's fine to share things, but talking about your issues and traumas on the first date or first few months of dates is scary.

I also agree with the idea of getting to know someone before you have sex. If you've build a relationship and trust and caring, the person is more likely to disclose if they have an STD for one thing. One night stands have turned into relationships, but it's not that likely. Not knocking 1 night stands, just saying if you are looking for lasting love, not a great choice.

Anonymous wrote:"always trust your gut."

sorry, but some people's guts just aren't rational.

So true.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My cousin is morbidly obese. She is 43. She told me last year that she was sexually abused.

So were a lot of skinny people.

I am sorry your cousin had to deal with that.

To the other poster, this is true. Among those with eating disorders (obesity and anorexia)there is a higher incidence of sexual abuse though having an ED does not mean you have definitely been abused.