Anonymous
Post 07/21/2013 14:49     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You stay together


WHAT!?! It does not work that way. If someone wants out...they are going to leave you and get a lawyer to help them do so. It might not be fair but its how it is.

Why the hell would you want to stay with someone who wants to divorce you?




<anonymus> Maybe they want to torture you
Anonymous
Post 06/19/2012 22:28     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
I worked as an attorney counseling domestic violence victims in Montgomery County, MD. A client, who was divorced, explained that her ex had sole custody of their child, and she paid child support, though her income was very low. I asked her how this had come about. She responded that he had filed for divorce, but she didn't want it, so she ignored and never responded to the documents served upon her. In short, wishing doesn't make it so. And ignore a court at your peril!

The above posts about being "stuck" and unable to divorce a spouse simply aren't true. If a divorce is contested it will just take longer than an uncontested one, regardless of the jurisdiction. But no one can force you to stay married if that's not what you want.
Anonymous
Post 06/14/2012 07:43     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My husband's ex wife was like this. She wasn't demanding in terms of nickel and diming him on child support or assets- they worked out a number, and she took what she wanted and he kept the rest- but she just REFUSED TO SIGN forever. Like, over 2 years. Filed the papers, they agreed to everything... and then she literally held onto them for the next 2.5 years, always with an excuse why she wouldn't get the signed papers filed and the court date set. When she finally decided she was "ready" they actually had to re-sign newer versions of the same papers because everything had been signed years before. Got a court date, judge dissolved it in 10 minutes flat and that was that, but boy, she just would not sign for the longest time. I'm sure my DH could have fought with her harder on it but he didn't want to piss her off or making the divorce contentious so he just let her hold out as long as she wanted and went about his life. She's a very strange bird, that one.


So what's the word I'm looking for? Compassion?


Don't catch your meaning- you feel compassion because you've been in a similar situation, or you think I should be showing compassion for her?


I think there by the grace of God may go you. So let's not name call until you actual get to the death do you part point. 2 years from now the next may be posting the same about you.


Ah, I see. Well, let me clarify: she is a strange bird in many ways, this not being the sole reason I think that. And I fully admit I'm not exempt from the possibility of divorce down the line but if someone doesn't want to be married to me, I have enough pride and self worth not to force them to remain married to me for years, even as we live apart and AS a divorced couple already, just because I can.
Anonymous
Post 06/14/2012 07:40     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:To 16:27: you say "time starts when you can prove that you two have not been living as man and wife." I am sure this has specific meanings. What is the definition, and what constitutes proof? TIA!


Sleeping apart in seperate locales. Sleep in the same house and the court finds out technically they have to start the clock again.
Now as a former solo prac I'm all for giving help when it's need for free but you missy need to go pay for a consult- even if it's a reduced fee one.


Laws vary by state. Under certain circumstances in VA, a legal separation can occur with both parties living under the same roof. You need to go get a real consultation, OP.
Anonymous
Post 06/13/2012 22:27     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My husband's ex wife was like this. She wasn't demanding in terms of nickel and diming him on child support or assets- they worked out a number, and she took what she wanted and he kept the rest- but she just REFUSED TO SIGN forever. Like, over 2 years. Filed the papers, they agreed to everything... and then she literally held onto them for the next 2.5 years, always with an excuse why she wouldn't get the signed papers filed and the court date set. When she finally decided she was "ready" they actually had to re-sign newer versions of the same papers because everything had been signed years before. Got a court date, judge dissolved it in 10 minutes flat and that was that, but boy, she just would not sign for the longest time. I'm sure my DH could have fought with her harder on it but he didn't want to piss her off or making the divorce contentious so he just let her hold out as long as she wanted and went about his life. She's a very strange bird, that one.


One day you will be her.

Your husband has already proven his (lack of) commitment level.

He can leave one there is a 50% chance he can leave another






What are you talking about? This was before we were together.
Anonymous
Post 06/13/2012 22:25     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
Anonymous wrote:To 16:27: you say "time starts when you can prove that you two have not been living as man and wife." I am sure this has specific meanings. What is the definition, and what constitutes proof? TIA!


Sleeping apart in seperate locales. Sleep in the same house and the court finds out technically they have to start the clock again.
Now as a former solo prac I'm all for giving help when it's need for free but you missy need to go pay for a consult- even if it's a reduced fee one.
Anonymous
Post 06/13/2012 22:23     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My husband's ex wife was like this. She wasn't demanding in terms of nickel and diming him on child support or assets- they worked out a number, and she took what she wanted and he kept the rest- but she just REFUSED TO SIGN forever. Like, over 2 years. Filed the papers, they agreed to everything... and then she literally held onto them for the next 2.5 years, always with an excuse why she wouldn't get the signed papers filed and the court date set. When she finally decided she was "ready" they actually had to re-sign newer versions of the same papers because everything had been signed years before. Got a court date, judge dissolved it in 10 minutes flat and that was that, but boy, she just would not sign for the longest time. I'm sure my DH could have fought with her harder on it but he didn't want to piss her off or making the divorce contentious so he just let her hold out as long as she wanted and went about his life. She's a very strange bird, that one.


So what's the word I'm looking for? Compassion?


Don't catch your meaning- you feel compassion because you've been in a similar situation, or you think I should be showing compassion for her?


I think there by the grace of God may go you. So let's not name call until you actual get to the death do you part point. 2 years from now the next may be posting the same about you.
Anonymous
Post 06/13/2012 22:17     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
Still asking ...
Anonymous
Post 06/09/2012 17:15     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
To 16:27: you say "time starts when you can prove that you two have not been living as man and wife." I am sure this has specific meanings. What is the definition, and what constitutes proof? TIA!
Anonymous
Post 06/08/2012 22:22     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:My husband's ex wife was like this. She wasn't demanding in terms of nickel and diming him on child support or assets- they worked out a number, and she took what she wanted and he kept the rest- but she just REFUSED TO SIGN forever. Like, over 2 years. Filed the papers, they agreed to everything... and then she literally held onto them for the next 2.5 years, always with an excuse why she wouldn't get the signed papers filed and the court date set. When she finally decided she was "ready" they actually had to re-sign newer versions of the same papers because everything had been signed years before. Got a court date, judge dissolved it in 10 minutes flat and that was that, but boy, she just would not sign for the longest time. I'm sure my DH could have fought with her harder on it but he didn't want to piss her off or making the divorce contentious so he just let her hold out as long as she wanted and went about his life. She's a very strange bird, that one.


One day you will be her.

Your husband has already proven his (lack of) commitment level.






What are you talking about? This was before we were together.
Anonymous
Post 06/08/2012 16:31     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
Anonymous wrote:My husband's ex wife was like this. She wasn't demanding in terms of nickel and diming him on child support or assets- they worked out a number, and she took what she wanted and he kept the rest- but she just REFUSED TO SIGN forever. Like, over 2 years. Filed the papers, they agreed to everything... and then she literally held onto them for the next 2.5 years, always with an excuse why she wouldn't get the signed papers filed and the court date set. When she finally decided she was "ready" they actually had to re-sign newer versions of the same papers because everything had been signed years before. Got a court date, judge dissolved it in 10 minutes flat and that was that, but boy, she just would not sign for the longest time. I'm sure my DH could have fought with her harder on it but he didn't want to piss her off or making the divorce contentious so he just let her hold out as long as she wanted and went about his life. She's a very strange bird, that one.


One day you will be her.

Your husband has already proven his (lack of) commitment level.




FBO
Post 06/08/2012 16:27     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
No idea about MD but in VA it isnt about whether or not the divorce is contested.

If you have no kids, you must wait 6 months before filing for divorce.

If you do have kids, you must wait one year.

Time starts when you can prove that you two have not been living as man and wife.
Anonymous
Post 06/08/2012 02:40     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
So when exactly did her husband turn into an asshole, after DC3? or she chose not to see the reality of things? NP here by the way.
Anonymous
Post 06/07/2012 23:28     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
That's not fair. She may be from a different area or country, got married young and had kids early. She said she has daughters that she has raised. Maybe a job that she could get was less than daycare for a couple of kids. It's not easy. Maybe her husband turned into an asshole over the years and takes his anger out on her. It can be depressing living with someone like that. Not everyone is as lucky as you, BITCH.
Anonymous
Post 06/04/2012 10:41     Subject: if one half of the couple doesn't want divorce?
"don't get me started on women's issues, but in my case, it is still a man's world and I am still living in an unhealthy, dead marriage because my husband refuses to "give" me a divorce."

Maybe if you got a job instead of letting a man support you you wouldn't fee that it is a "man's world."