Anonymous wrote:This is OP.....


http://youtu.be/RUFT35S7Jb4

Let us guess . . . you're one of the girls who enjoys being mean?!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure you will consider this mean, OP, but that's not why I'm writing it. It just strikes me as odd when people come on here asking everyone to be nice when that is clearly not the character of this particular message board. Who are you that you expect everyone else to change just to make you comfortable? We can check with Jeff but I really don't think the mean posts are written by a few disgruntled people. I think a lot of people like DCUM the way it is. Nobody has a gun to your head to read the mean posts, or to even come on here at all. (Once you've been on here a while you will be able to tell pretty quickly whoch threads are likely to get snarky.). There are thousands of other message boards if this one is not right for you. But coming on here and expecting something different from what it is seems either very naive or very entitled, or both.

This.

NOPE. The mean spiritedness detracts from the purpose of DCUM. It's intended to be a support forum from what I see. So how does snarkiness help? One can write to vent about their struggle with weight loss and can expect to be called a cow. One can write and grieve about their deceased child and be told to stop being whiney. That's what DCUM threads can turn into. So how is that helpful? Yes, the mean posts are often times written by people who are angry.

Genuine curiousity: Where do you see this? How do you glean this "intention?" I just looked at "About DCUM" and don't see this theory validated at all.

I've found that I get the most out of DCUM if...

1. I assume the vast majority of writers are good folks

2. A very small minority of the good folks just stick their foot in it now and then

3. The very, very, very small minority of truly snarky folks just happen to be prolific and

4. I know what I came here for: useful insight. (So I ignore the rest.)

Took me awhile to arrive at #4, but, finally! Works for me!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am half assuming that someone will post something mean in response to my post. Please resist the urge. Just for Memorial Day?

The problem with DCUM is it's frequented by very smart and witty people whose smarts and wit are often laced with snark and cutting humor because, well, that's who they (we) are. They (we) also have strong opinions, and being D.C., most of us are former debate champions, law review editors, or the like. Yes, it would be nice if they (we) could check ourselves more often. But it's hard denying who we are. And, it's also liberating to truly let loose every once in a while.

Yuck, you are so full of yourself, I need to vomit

Every post includes both support and snark. The anonymity has allowed me to respond honestly to topics that in real life I might feel forced to bite my tongue about. I've seen numerous threads that have been highly supportive and provided its OP courage in dealing with personal issues.

I love DCUM! Thanks Jeff for providing us this forum.

I've only been visiting this forum for a few weeks. I am still amazed at how nice and positive people are, considering that pretty much everybody posts anonymously. People are very generous with their support and opinions when they see somebody in need of help.

I also visit a couple of forums where everybody has to register an ID to post. Over time, IDs develop reputation, as well as personal grudges. Many discussions are hijacked by personal feud. Even worse, "Nice" IDs register new IDs just to fight nasty. The fights in those places are a lot worse because of the bad history of the IDs, and languages are a lot fouler. About once a week, a forum admin has to come out to kill IDs, block IPs ... generally performs house cleaning.

So I think we have a good thing going here Maybe a local forum like this is nicer because people actually live close to one another and might bump into one another.

I never considered DCUM to be a support forum. I enjoy the entertainment of the snarkiness. It's a nice escape. Yes, I often am snarky too. Most people get support from friends and family, not anonymous Internet people. There are lots of support forums for parents all over the web. I don't use DCUM for that purpose. Sorry.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure you will consider this mean, OP, but that's not why I'm writing it. It just strikes me as odd when people come on here asking everyone to be nice when that is clearly not the character of this particular message board. Who are you that you expect everyone else to change just to make you comfortable? We can check with Jeff but I really don't think the mean posts are written by a few disgruntled people. I think a lot of people like DCUM the way it is. Nobody has a gun to your head to read the mean posts, or to even come on here at all. (Once you've been on here a while you will be able to tell pretty quickly whoch threads are likely to get snarky.). There are thousands of other message boards if this one is not right for you. But coming on here and expecting something different from what it is seems either very naive or very entitled, or both.

This.

NOPE. The mean spiritedness detracts from the purpose of DCUM. It's intended to be a support forum from what I see. So how does snarkiness help? One can write to vent about their struggle with weight loss and can expect to be called a cow. One can write and grieve about their deceased child and be told to stop being whiney. That's what DCUM threads can turn into. So how is that helpful? Yes, the mean posts are often times written by people who are angry.

Personally, I'm more offended by the Pollyannas.

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure you will consider this mean, OP, but that's not why I'm writing it. It just strikes me as odd when people come on here asking everyone to be nice when that is clearly not the character of this particular message board. Who are you that you expect everyone else to change just to make you comfortable? We can check with Jeff but I really don't think the mean posts are written by a few disgruntled people. I think a lot of people like DCUM the way it is. Nobody has a gun to your head to read the mean posts, or to even come on here at all. (Once you've been on here a while you will be able to tell pretty quickly whoch threads are likely to get snarky.). There are thousands of other message boards if this one is not right for you. But coming on here and expecting something different from what it is seems either very naive or very entitled, or both.

This.

This is OP.....


http://youtu.be/RUFT35S7Jb4

Anonymous wrote:I am half assuming that someone will post something mean in response to my post. Please resist the urge. Just for Memorial Day?

Why are you stalking this message board on Memorial Day? I still think you need a new hobby.

Anonymous wrote:You set your aim too high. Next time aim for one hour or one thread with no mean posts.

And 06:00 you are hilarious and you don't even realize it. I love it when people on this forum go on these masturbating love fests about the people of DC who frequent this board.

Yes, that poster was quite amusing with the association of snarkiness with intelligence and wit--not to be confused with intelligence, kindness, and tactfulness.

You set your aim too high. Next time aim for one hour or one thread with no mean posts.

And 06:00 you are hilarious and you don't even realize it. I love it when people on this forum go on these masturbating love fests about the people of DC who frequent this board.