Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:you people are so lazy. if you don't want to do it then don't. no one is forcing you. if your DC doesn't bring in a flower and sees all the other kids doing it.... i don't care. the pta's organize these things because left to their own devices most parents forget or send in a bunch of junk. so the friendly reminder - gift card day - is really a message - 'don't be so cheap, go get a gift card and send it in on wednesday or we know you'll forget about it'.

Thanks, but I can remember to be appreciative on my own terms. Frankly I find your post rather patronizing.

Amen sister! The whole notion of forced teacher appreciation is patronizing. Good teachers get appreciation-plenty of it. I know because not only did i used to teach, but many in my family taught before this whole idea of forcing people to show gratitude artificially ever existed.

One more thing...teacher's get appreciated. They get showered with material things and lovely cards during the holidays and end of year and there are plenty of parents volunteering and doing other things to show appreciation.

This is not sorority hazing. No need to force or guilt trip people into kissing the ground the teacher walks on. I have yet to meet a parent who when pleased doesn't show appreciation. Yes, we show appreciation to specials teachers too. If you make a positive difference in my child's life I can assure you I will make sure you know it.

Most people are appreciative. To 20:51 I think you are the one attributing negative intentions to people. You assume we are too stupid to know how to show appreciation in a way we find meaningful.

I taught years ago before I had kids. I was not a fan of teacher appreciation week. The cards people wrote to me mid year and end of year meant more to me than any gift, let alone "forced appreciation." Most of my colleagues could have done without teacher appreciation week. I felt so sad for all the parents who spent money and time baking something special when most of the faculty was either on a diet, had food allergies or was diabetic. So much ended up in the teacher's lounge.

It's not as simple as "if you don't like it, don't do it." Would you want your kid to be the only one not participating? What about the parents with financial constaints?

I am a warm fuzzy sentimental type of person and if I think a teacher is amazing, she/he will know it. I will write long thank you notes and give gifts at the holidays. I will volunteer. I will ask what supplies are needed in the classroom so I can donate. When I adore a teacher I find it mildly annoying to have people tell me when and how to show appreciation, but when a teacher stinks, I find it downright obnoxious to force this on people.

Yes, yes I know..stop complaining and join the PTA. People work so hard, blah, blah. Guess what? I work really hard too at home and outside the home and I do plenty for the school.

[quote=Anonymous]I don't understand the level of anger this all generates on both ends. I fall in the camp of people who think there is not enough you can do for a good teacher -- volunteer in the room, send extra supplies, leave cookies in the lounge, etc. On the other hand, I also never want a child whose parents choose not to participate, or who cannot participate, to feel left out. I can see how it would be stressful to parents who are short on time and money to continually be asked to chip in.

It seems to me that there is often an assumption that the volunteers who come up with the ideas for teacher appreciation are trying to make everyone else's life harder or somehow "one-up" other people. I think it is more likely that they are trying their best to involve as many people as possible and do something nice on a very limited budget. Organizing a group effort is difficult at the best of times and you can never please everyone. Many people like to contribute to a group gift or effort (organized days) because it does not require original thought and smaller contributions can have a big impact. Others are indignant that someone dared to ask for any contribution of time or money.

I think people need to avoid attributing the worst motive to the people who take the time to organize these efforts. We should all do our best to shower our children's teachers with help and appreciation on a daily basis. They get to spend more time with our kids than we do. Let's face it, even with the most well-behaved kids, that is not always easy. If you have spent any time in your kids classrooms lately, you have seen that managing 25-30 different personalities with their own moods, needs, and wants is no easy task. A happy teacher helps make happier students. If knowing that people cared enough to try to show appreciation with a flower makes the teacher's day a little happier, mission accomplished.

Finally, if you take issue with "forced" appreciation, what would you suggest as an alternative? I bet the other parents would love it if you want to volunteer to be in charge of organizing the effort next year. I would love to hear ways to get all the kids and families involved in building teacher morale without "bothering" anyone.

[/quote]

I'd bet money I know who this poster is.

I don't understand the level of anger this all generates on both ends. I fall in the camp of people who think there is not enough you can do for a good teacher -- volunteer in the room, send extra supplies, leave cookies in the lounge, etc. On the other hand, I also never want a child whose parents choose not to participate, or who cannot participate, to feel left out. I can see how it would be stressful to parents who are short on time and money to continually be asked to chip in.

It seems to me that there is often an assumption that the volunteers who come up with the ideas for teacher appreciation are trying to make everyone else's life harder or somehow "one-up" other people. I think it is more likely that they are trying their best to involve as many people as possible and do something nice on a very limited budget. Organizing a group effort is difficult at the best of times and you can never please everyone. Many people like to contribute to a group gift or effort (organized days) because it does not require original thought and smaller contributions can have a big impact. Others are indignant that someone dared to ask for any contribution of time or money.

I think people need to avoid attributing the worst motive to the people who take the time to organize these efforts. We should all do our best to shower our children's teachers with help and appreciation on a daily basis. They get to spend more time with our kids than we do. Let's face it, even with the most well-behaved kids, that is not always easy. If you have spent any time in your kids classrooms lately, you have seen that managing 25-30 different personalities with their own moods, needs, and wants is no easy task. A happy teacher helps make happier students. If knowing that people cared enough to try to show appreciation with a flower makes the teacher's day a little happier, mission accomplished.

Finally, if you take issue with "forced" appreciation, what would you suggest as an alternative? I bet the other parents would love it if you want to volunteer to be in charge of organizing the effort next year. I would love to hear ways to get all the kids and families involved in building teacher morale without "bothering" anyone.

I don't understand the level of anger this all generates on both ends. I fall in the camp of people who think there is not enough you can do for a good teacher -- volunteer in the room, send extra supplies, leave cookies in the lounge, etc. On the other hand, I also never want a child whose parents choose not to participate, or who cannot participate, to feel left out. I can see how it would be stressful to parents who are short on time and money to continually be asked to chip in.

It seems to me that there is often an assumption that the volunteers who come up with the ideas for teacher appreciation are trying to make everyone else's life harder or somehow "one-up" other people. I think it is more likely that they are trying their best to involve as many people as possible and do something nice on a very limited budget. Organizing a group effort is difficult at the best of times and you can never please everyone. Many people like to contribute to a group gift or effort (organized days) because it does not require original thought and smaller contributions can have a big impact. Others are indignant that someone dared to ask for any contribution of time or money.

I think people need to avoid attributing the worst motive to the people who take the time to organize these efforts. We should all do our best to shower our children's teachers with help and appreciation on a daily basis. They get to spend more time with our kids than we do. Let's face it, even with the most well-behaved kids, that is not always easy. If you have spent any time in your kids classrooms lately, you have seen that managing 25-30 different personalities with their own moods, needs, and wants is no easy task. A happy teacher helps make happier students. If knowing that people cared enough to try to show appreciation with a flower makes the teacher's day a little happier, mission accomplished.

Finally, if you take issue with "forced" appreciation, what would you suggest as an alternative? I bet the other parents would love it if you want to volunteer to be in charge of organizing the effort next year. I would love to hear ways to get all the kids and families involved in building teacher morale without "bothering" anyone.

Thanks, but I can remember to be appreciative on my own terms. Frankly I find your post rather patronizing.

oxymoron.

Anonymous wrote:I love the idea of a single flower to fill a whole vase brought in from all kids. What I hate are the parents who buy an entire $20 bouquet from WF (or the like) and make the rest of the kids feel bad.

And that's the thing: You have people (example: on this thread) who say Oh, you don't like it? Just don't do it then and quitcherbitchin.
And your kid is the one who doesn't bring something and there are the kids who do a ridiculous amount of "appreciation."

I love the idea of a single flower to fill a whole vase brought in from all kids. What I hate are the parents who buy an entire $20 bouquet from WF (or the like) and make the rest of the kids feel bad.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you never seen a school full of children each walking in with single flowers and then putting them in a vase on the teacher's desk? It's heartwarming. The tulips from gardens mixed with the buttercups from the lawns and azelas trimmed from bushes. I am a teacher. I love it.

That's heartwarming. But honestly, not every kid lives amongst a garden oasis.

The buttercups are mostly from the school lawn, along with some dandelions. The children pick as they come in.

Anonymous wrote:Have you never seen a school full of children each walking in with single flowers and then putting them in a vase on the teacher's desk? It's heartwarming. The tulips from gardens mixed with the buttercups from the lawns and azelas trimmed from bushes. I am a teacher. I love it.

That's heartwarming. But honestly, not every kid lives amongst a garden oasis.

Have you never seen a school full of children each walking in with single flowers and then putting them in a vase on the teacher's desk? It's heartwarming. The tulips from gardens mixed with the buttercups from the lawns and azelas trimmed from bushes. I am a teacher. I love it.

Anonymous wrote:

so the friendly reminder - gift card day - is really a message - 'don't be so cheap, go get a gift card and send it in on wednesday or we know you'll forget about it'.

I'm happy to get a gift card and would appreciate a reminder. But I really don't want to do things like baking a treat or bringing a flower from my garden. I don't have a garden, and I don't bake, not even for my own family. I am happy to give something, but it makes me feel uncomfortable that a lot of the things "suggested" are really out of character for me. I would prefer a reminder to do something, without specific orders as to what that has to be.

I jsut send a donation to the PTA for the pool. I do send a flower in because the kids LOVE to give them to the teachers. I have a yard but sometimes it's not the right time of year for good flowers in my yard. I try and buy a couple bouquets from Costco or the grocery store. My kids take in one and then I take the rest to the morning assembly room to give to the kids who don't have one, particularly the low income kids. I always feel so bad for them because they feel bad when they can't do those things. I definitely don't bake.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:you people are so lazy. if you don't want to do it then don't. no one is forcing you. if your DC doesn't bring in a flower and sees all the other kids doing it.... i don't care. the pta's organize these things because left to their own devices most parents forget or send in a bunch of junk. so the friendly reminder - gift card day - is really a message - 'don't be so cheap, go get a gift card and send it in on wednesday or we know you'll forget about it'.

wow. And all this post does is makes me want to wash my hands of the whole thing!!!

WEll, I think a poster on here might have some extra hand towels for you to dry them with!

so the friendly reminder - gift card day - is really a message - 'don't be so cheap, go get a gift card and send it in on wednesday or we know you'll forget about it'.

I'm happy to get a gift card and would appreciate a reminder. But I really don't want to do things like baking a treat or bringing a flower from my garden. I don't have a garden, and I don't bake, not even for my own family. I am happy to give something, but it makes me feel uncomfortable that a lot of the things "suggested" are really out of character for me. I would prefer a reminder to do something, without specific orders as to what that has to be.