OP,

You did the right thing. Maybe your niece was reaching out to get another adult involved, I hope she's not too upset. Good luck.

That took a lot of courage, OP. I hope your nephew gets the help he needs.

OP, you did the right thing and I hope it works out for everyone. I know it took a lot of bravery to do what you did and I'm sure that your niece, nephew and brother are thankful that you stepped in to get your nephew the help he needs. Best of luck to you and your family.

Op here. I told my niece what I had to do and why. She is 22 and going through her own issues she can't have this over her head. Talked to my brother last night. We will see what next steps are. Thanks everyone your advice was very valuable. So sorry the the posters who have dealt wiTh this.

In our family, our nephew has had a continuing problem with oxy. If his younger brother had come to me about it, there is no way I could keep his confidence. Not only does he need rehab and continuing care, he's come close to OD'ing six times in the last year. If his parents hadn't been involved, I'm 100% sure my nephew would be dead by now.

Heroin is a big problem and, as everyone has said, he isn't likely to beat this addiction alone. Tell your niece that this is a matter of life and death (and it really is) and that you have to tell your brother. Yep, the sh*t is going to hit the fan, but her brother needs help that she can't provide.

Good luck. This is a terrible problem for any family to face.

Is your niece an older sister or a younger one?

I think that if you're dealing with another adult, saying "You can tell or I can" is reasonable. If you're dealing with a younger teen, then I think you need to sit down, explain to her why you're worried and go together, or simply let her know and go in her stead. She's already done a very brave thing in telling you, and I totally think stepping in and saying "you did a great job by telling an adult, we'll take it from here", is reasonable.

Anonymous wrote:This is not a confidence that you can keep. Frankly, if you were my sister and you kept this information from me, this would cost us our relationship.

You do not have a moral obligation to keep a confidence about an adolescent's drug use from a parent. Especially a family member. You can and should explain to your niece why you are not going to keep the secret, but it is not a confidence that can be kept. Someone's life and health is at stake.

I would not give her the option of doing it herself, since she obviously has refrained from doing so.

I agree, but I would let the niece know first that you are telling and give her a chance to at least say her piece first to her parents - then you talk to your brother too. Then you might want to go to Al-Anon yourself (for friends and family of addicts - its a great support group). In my experience with addicts, it could take a few 30-day or 90-day programs to get sobriety to finally stick. Usually addicts have to hit their bottom before they decide to make a life change. And in my opinion, your nephew will need a sponsor in AA or NA and regular meeting attendance. Don't forget to pray if you believe in that. Good luck!

some secrets are not meant to keep- unsafe secrets for example. Tell your niece you must tell the dad, she can do it with you if she wants, but you are going to have to. You are the adult one in charge in this situation, you absolutely have to say something.

You have to tell your brother. You can call the niece first and explain why you're doing it, but it needs to be done...ASAP!

I have a close friend who lost his brother to a heroin overdose. He was 21.