DH's best friend from HS...has been in and out of state prison, and most recent federal prison...DUI/DWI's, violated probation, pawned a stolen handgun (among other things)...he is an addict (alcohol for sure, not sure what else). It took DH a long time to let go, but we cut ties about a year ago. We do think he is a good person who has a bad, bad problem...but we have a family to protect. This guy has lied to us so many times and it is really hurtful to my DH (a very trusting and forgiving person). We pray that this man makes a full recovery from his disease...but the damage has been done and there are consequences for his actions.

I have two who went to jail for murder.

The first was the nicest kindest soul I ever met. He shook his baby and it resulted in the child's death. We traded letters and stayed in touch. I honestly was in denial about it at first: I always knew that he had to be responsible, but I couldn't reconcile how he could have done it on purpose. I always assumed it was some horrible accident. Then I had kids and I understand alot better how he could have been pushed that far. Ironically it was at that point I stopped having any contact with him because I finally accepted that it wasn't an accident. I had a baby who was a colicky nightmare, she'd screamed for HOURS, slept horribly (which meant I didn't sleep), if she was quiet and I gave her to someone else or put her down would start screaming again, and I STILL wouldn't dream of shaking her. How could he do that? He's out now. We don't talk.

My other friend murdered the mother of his children, while his oldest watched, because she wanted to move away to a place with better job prospects. I hadn't spoken to him in a year when it happened, and I'm not interested in getting back in touch.

My brother for felony (breaking into people's cars and stealing checks and forging checks), etc. he was doing drugs at the time. I even think he stole my car radio. He went to prison for 1 year, visited him and still in touch years later. He never really turned his life around, never got a degree, is a Dad to my nephew (not a great one, but tries), works for my other brother (who is loaded $$), we all love him and try to help him as best we can. something just doesnt work right in his mind...we love him the best we can

Anonymous wrote:I have two friends in for first degree murder. I support one completely as I experienced what lead to the killing. The other I can't support at all and he knows this. The first one I visit often, the second I send cards on all the holidays.

Wow, what lead to the killing? Was this an abused spouse?

Anonymous wrote:Friend convicted of DUI after a major accident that put two people in the hospital. Another friend for downloading stuff on the Internet. Both were remorseful and good people. Visited both in jail until they got out, donated some spending money for their prison accounts. Sometimes friendship means accepting the imperfections of that person and treating them as you would wish to be treated.

"stuff"? I wonder could that stuff have been kiddie porn? I am not sure that I would call that an imperfection.

Yes, two. A cousin who went in on felony drug charge. I am not actively avoiding him ber we were not close to begin with so not much has changed. We are friends on facebook but that is about it.

A half brother who has been in and out on various drug charges (not too major since he is never in for more than a year). I avoid him like the plague bc he is just bad news. Did I mention that he has 10 kids by abt 5 different women.

DH's uncle: child pornography and inappropriate contact with a minor. He got a lessor sentence for turning on his co-horts. I refuse to have any contact with him or allow my children to have contact with him. DH's family is pissed and accuse me of be homophobic. Sexual orientation is not the issue. Abusing children is.

DH had a college friend who turned out to be a sociopath: pathological liar, rapist and beater of two women, as far as we know he is in jail, but he is from a rich family, and this happened about 20 years ago. Maybe he's out there again, but we're not looking for him!

Anonymous wrote:Yes. A little boy I babysat for in college, and loved dearly, grew up to be an 18 year old boy who opened up the WRONG video on Limewire and then was dumb enough to forward it to a friend, saying WTF??? Blammo...interstate trafficking in child pornography. Before everyone jumps in to scream "DENIAL!", the forensic exam of his computer fully supports the facts as reported -- no other evidence to speak of for additional child pornography, no suspect search terms, etc. It's also why he got an unusually light sentence in federal prison -- 3 years, well below the minimum under the sentencing guidelines. His parents are devestated. I write to him, send him packages and books, etc, and hope to visit him this year if I can. His institution is located in another part of the country so it's difficult.

Wow. That is unbelievable. And so sad.

I have two friends in for first degree murder. I support one completely as I experienced what lead to the killing. The other I can't support at all and he knows this. The first one I visit often, the second I send cards on all the holidays.

College friend...crack cocaine/assault on mother/DUI. Used to write letters, but not anymore because she got herself back in jail. Very sad. Good person. Addiction sucks.

Another person. White collar embezzlement. More an acquaintance, so no letters, although was invited to his party when he hot out if jail.

Yes. A little boy I babysat for in college, and loved dearly, grew up to be an 18 year old boy who opened up the WRONG video on Limewire and then was dumb enough to forward it to a friend, saying WTF??? Blammo...interstate trafficking in child pornography. Before everyone jumps in to scream "DENIAL!", the forensic exam of his computer fully supports the facts as reported -- no other evidence to speak of for additional child pornography, no suspect search terms, etc. It's also why he got an unusually light sentence in federal prison -- 3 years, well below the minimum under the sentencing guidelines. His parents are devestated. I write to him, send him packages and books, etc, and hope to visit him this year if I can. His institution is located in another part of the country so it's difficult.

I'm the PP with the DH's friend convicted of rape.

The dinner was a sort of send-off put together by his parents in the event that he did get jail time. I guess they meant it more as a "support Joe" dinner. Joe did not think there was any chance he was going to jail. I was getting all my info. from DH who was getting his info. from Joe. When I got to the sentencing hearing the next day (DH was trying to be supportive and I was just tagging along), I realized that Joe was in serious denial b/c wife was saying through tears that she didn't mean for anything bad to happen to Joe (which I don't think she would have said if she was really the knieving vixen that Joe portrayed), and the presentence report recommended something like 10 years. At that point, I realized that Joe was in denial b/c he had dismissed the presentence report (at least to those of us at the dinner).

No presents were exchanged b/c at the time of the dinner he was making plans for the disposition of his property (maybe he was just pretending like it wasn't going to happen, but still admitting to himself that it was possible???? I don't know.) When the sentence was given, we watched him get cuffed and taken away after giving his wallet and watch to his parents. This was a 40 yr. old guy. Not the kind of guy you would expect to go to prison.

Good news for him -- he met a woman while he was in prison, when he got out, I think they got married. Don't know what has happened to him. We wish him well.... from a distance.

As an aside, when he got out and wanted to visit us, I was kind of freaked. He slept in the basement, but I put a whole bunch of toys in the hall in front of my 2 yr old DD's room so that he would trip on them and make a lot of noise (just in case he came upstairs). DH thought I was overreacting, but I didn't know this guy! I slept better knowing I had cobbled together an alarm system.

Friend convicted of DUI after a major accident that put two people in the hospital. Another friend for downloading stuff on the Internet. Both were remorseful and good people. Visited both in jail until they got out, donated some spending money for their prison accounts. Sometimes friendship means accepting the imperfections of that person and treating them as you would wish to be treated.

Yes. Brother 10 years for drugs. Little contact and I feel guilty