Anonymous wrote:It seems to me that there's a difference between a remark that stereotypes about an ethnic group, and a remark that simply states the obvious -- that they dress modestly. If the husband had said that the outfit makes them look moneygrubbing or pushy or bagel-eating, okay that would be inappropriate. But modesty is the focus of how Orthodox Jewish women dress. They cover their bodies and their hair. Why would it be insensitive to state that?

Because it wasn't a simple observation about clothes that Orthodox Jews wear. He was making fun of those clothes.

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I guess I should clarify that when my husband said HOT, he was being sarcastic. Because I made a really unattractive outfit even more unattractive. Sort of the opposite of a strip tease. I just kept piling on more hideous clothing. We just joke around like that.

Do you want a relationship medal? I think now you are mocking. And, how much hideous clothing do you own? Maybe you need a makeover if you have that many bad outfits to "pile" them on.

It seems to me that there's a difference between a remark that stereotypes about an ethnic group, and a remark that simply states the obvious -- that they dress modestly. If the husband had said that the outfit makes them look moneygrubbing or pushy or bagel-eating, okay that would be inappropriate. But modesty is the focus of how Orthodox Jewish women dress. They cover their bodies and their hair. Why would it be insensitive to state that?

Not offensive to me. I tell my mother all the time that her outfits make her look too Hasiddic and that it's okay to show off her elbows and knees.

point is, a husband should be able to say offensive things (not that this was) to his wife. who gives a $%^? you shouldn't edit yourself to your spouse.

Maybe your friend has a sexual fetish for Orthodox Jews and she thinks you were making fun of her.

"It just got more conservative in here"? That's hilarious. Your mistake was apparently choosing the wrong audience to retell this to.

One of my best friends is an Orthodox Jew and sometimes she'll tease me about how Orthodox I'm looking that day in a particular outfit (I'm not Jewish).

Granddaughter of an orthodox rabbi. I don't care and I know he would have laughed. But he doesn't represent all orthodox Jews.

Maybe if pepole laughed a bit more at things that make us different - there would be less hate and anger.

Ortho Jew. I could care less! A PP is right, much more important things to worry about.

OP here. I guess I should clarify that when my husband said HOT, he was being sarcastic. Because I made a really unattractive outfit even more unattractive. Sort of the opposite of a strip tease. I just kept piling on more hideous clothing. We just joke around like that.

Maybe it was the "Hot?" the fact that he was sexualizing a group of women that dress conservatively for the express purpose of NOT being sexualized? That's all I can think of.

But I wish people would stop saying, "I'm X, and I don't find it offensive." Just because you belong to the ethic/cultural/racial group doesn't mean you speak on behalf of all of the members of that group. And just because you feel a certain way about a topic doesn't mean every other Jewish person will feel the same way.

Anonymous wrote:Her Orthodox cousin wouldn't care. She would blow it off. We Jews have bigger things to worry about.

uh

Just b/c you're a Jew doesn't mean you know my friend's Orthodox cousin.

She WOULD care . . .

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Any orthodox jews around to hear the remark? No? Then your friend needs to relax. And you need to keep in mind that your friend is clearly the PC police.

BUt I'm sure the DCUM PC Police will be by shortly to write you a citation as well.

I agree that it wasn't that offensive, but the reasoning of PP is totally off. So long as no gays are around you can make gay jokes, for example? By the way, the term "PC police" is pretty ignorant.

But it wasn't a joke. It was true. What's the big deal?