Never. DS has no interest in sports.

OP, does your kid even want to play soccer?

Anonymous wrote:My DS was very shy of direct confrontation in soccer when he was 8. Now that he 10 he is much more confident with the ball and dribbles forward and scores frequently. He is still shy of certain positions (like goalie) but we have a great coach who has been very patient with him. Main thing, never shout harsh criticism from the sidelines--( get in the game...really?!I see coaches doing this and it turns my stomach.

And in addition parents should not coach at all. The coach is there to do that. Yelling "run over there", "get downfield", etc are all no-no's that i notice many parents do.
"Good play! " "way to go" "good ball" are all fine. More post play vs pre play.

I think your boy is doing fine. He is playing in an age-appropriate way, although not the way you would prefer. He's fine.

OP, my DS has some executive functioning issues and if your son has attention issues he's more at risk for these as well. It can affect more than just the classroom--soccer has a lot of moving parts--teammates, the ball, and people yelling things from the sidelines. It may not be that he's not "coachable," rather he may do better at sports that fragment his focus less. (swimming, track)

I'd say if he enjoys it then keep playing. If his performance is causing a lot of tension with the other players or coach, maybe try finding a team that's more laid back/recreational.

Anonymous wrote:My DS was very shy of direct confrontation in soccer when he was 8. Now that he 10 he is much more confident with the ball and dribbles forward and scores frequently. He is still shy of certain positions (like goalie) but we have a great coach who has been very patient with him. Main thing, never shout harsh criticism from the sidelines--( get in the game...really?!I see coaches doing this and it turns my stomach.

Just want to say our coach shouts positive encouragement she is awesome! I've heard opponent coaches that yell negative stuff--not detailed instructions like: spread out Ducks! or Cover the center, Ducks! is fine. Just randomly yelling: Stop quitting, Johnny! Get in the game, Johnny! is just really negative.

Goalie will be great until about 10 yrs old, when the goals triple in size. Then it won't work unless he's really focused and athletic.

Definitely second the executive function or ADD aspect. Could be -- the kids who were the spaciest early on on the soccer team were later diagnosed with exec function and/or ADD or ADHD, to a one, including mine.

My DS was very shy of direct confrontation in soccer when he was 8. Now that he 10 he is much more confident with the ball and dribbles forward and scores frequently. He is still shy of certain positions (like goalie) but we have a great coach who has been very patient with him. Main thing, never shout harsh criticism from the sidelines--( get in the game...really?!I see coaches doing this and it turns my stomach.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To my non-expert ear, it sounds like a developmental or possibly executive function kind of issue.

I have no idea what this means. Are you suggesting that a 2d grader who doesn't always pay attention during a soccer game has an executive function problem, or simply that as he gets older this is likely to resolve itself? Because I think the former is ridiculous.

Um, did you read the OP's post? I'm suggesting that a kid who can't exercise executive function sufficient to control his participation in the game --- to the extent that he is at the wrong end of the field and acting in ways that are noticably atypical --- may have a slight developmental or executive function difference. But you weren't really looking to understand, were you?

Actually I did read OP's post and I read your post and I was looking to understand if that's what you meant (as opposed to, say, if you meant that it was an issue related to the stage of development the OP's kid is in).

I guess I fundamentally disagree about what constitutes "acting in ways that are noticeably atypical." I've spent a lot of time at 2d grader soccer games and I can tell you that not really paying attention to what's going on at all times-- or being on defense when the team is on offense, or vice-versa-- is not "noticeably atypical".

I do admit that it bugs me when people assume that 2d graders who aren't acting like little mini adults at all times have developmental or executive function problems.

OP here - interesting observations, thanks for sharing, but very different from mine. perhaps the rest of his teammates all happened to be more mature or coachable than a typical U8 player, because he really is the only one who acted like that at every game. yes, some games he's better, but at others you'd hear his name being called every minute he's on the field... yeah it's a bit uncomfortable and perhaps made it looked worse than it did.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To my non-expert ear, it sounds like a developmental or possibly executive function kind of issue.

I have no idea what this means. Are you suggesting that a 2d grader who doesn't always pay attention during a soccer game has an executive function problem, or simply that as he gets older this is likely to resolve itself? Because I think the former is ridiculous.

Um, did you read the OP's post? I'm suggesting that a kid who can't exercise executive function sufficient to control his participation in the game --- to the extent that he is at the wrong end of the field and acting in ways that are noticably atypical --- may have a slight developmental or executive function difference. But you weren't really looking to understand, were you?

Actually I did read OP's post and I read your post and I was looking to understand if that's what you meant (as opposed to, say, if you meant that it was an issue related to the stage of development the OP's kid is in).

I guess I fundamentally disagree about what constitutes "acting in ways that are noticeably atypical." I've spent a lot of time at 2d grader soccer games and I can tell you that not really paying attention to what's going on at all times-- or being on defense when the team is on offense, or vice-versa-- is not "noticeably atypical".

I do admit that it bugs me when people assume that 2d graders who aren't acting like little mini adults at all times have developmental or executive function problems.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:To my non-expert ear, it sounds like a developmental or possibly executive function kind of issue.

I have no idea what this means. Are you suggesting that a 2d grader who doesn't always pay attention during a soccer game has an executive function problem, or simply that as he gets older this is likely to resolve itself? Because I think the former is ridiculous.

Um, did you read the OP's post? I'm suggesting that a kid who can't exercise executive function sufficient to control his participation in the game --- to the extent that he is at the wrong end of the field and acting in ways that are noticably atypical --- may have a slight developmental or executive function difference. But you weren't really looking to understand, were you?